Another Monday is here which means it’s time for the Super Dumb Bros. to fire up their Nintendo Switches and play some damn video games! This week, Matt & Chris continue their journey through the Telltale game The Walking Dead, and then play some RiffTrax: The Game with viewers! Yes!!!!

Transcript: Two souls stranded in a barren wasteland. Oh, Rhino, let me sing. Oh, keepers of the cool. Oh, masters of the past. I seek thy catalog. Eight hundred number. Eight hundred four three two O O two O. It's a free call. It's a free catalog. With catalogs in hand, I wander through these sacred decades. Be it rock and roll, country, rhythm and blues, comedy children's fair or the unravished home video oh fair rhino oh sweet rhino oh virtuous rhino when old age shall this generation waste thou shalt remain the bastion of taste rhino rocks my world eight hundred four three two oh oh two oh Some surprising news from Big Sur Water Bands. No down payment. No payment for six months, partner. No interest for six months, mate. Now get the bedroom you've always wanted and don't pay a thing till summer. Best of all, we haven't raised our everyday low prices to bring you this offer. Could we make it any easier to buy a waterbed? No way, Jose. Big Sur Waterbeds, America's largest. It's the night on everyone's mind. This could affect half the continental United States. The night they warned us about. Now we're starting to see some problems. Help me! What if they're right? We have to start evacuations. The survival of buildings comes down to one man. I have complete faith in you. Ken Olympe in an NBC motion picture event. Y-II-K, the movie. NBC Sunday in two weeks. Hey, New York. Hey, New York. New York, New York. What's up, New York? I love New York. Hey, New York. You're watching the WB. The WB. You are watching. Whoobie. You're watching. The WB. Wobby. You're watching. The WB. What's with the singing frog? The WB. Don't you wish you lived on TV? You're watching. You're watching. The WB. Channel Eleven. Eleven. Eleven. Eleven. Channel Eleven. Eleven. Channel Eleven. Eleven. Channel Eleven. Channel Eleven. We are the ones to watch. Susie! Mama! Susie, you're gross! Look at me! I'm a big girl now! Time for your bottle! Mommy, I'm too big for a bottle! Let's play a game! A guessing game! What's this? Is it my sippy cup? You really know! Yahoo! She really grows! Hugs and kisses! Love and gross Susie really knows! And she grows! Batteries not included! Now, from Ingham. Chicken. Chippies. Crispy potato crumbs on the outside. Chicken on the inside. And they're absolutely delicious. Look for chicken chippies hiding in supermarket freezers. Watch Zelda become a legend on your Nintendo Entertainment System. Zelda! After-Rocks! Which way to go? Good times! P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P- New for two thousand seventy eight. PlayStation nine's new electronic spores tap straight into your adrenal gland. PS nine has improved retinal scanners. A mind control system. Holographic movie surround vision. and telepathic personal music. The ultimate just got better. PlayStation nine, teleport yours today. Gadgets are turning up everywhere, even at McDonald's. A leg that's really a flashlight, an arm that's really an extendable grabber. Inside every two-ninety-nine hamburger Happy Meal you buy, your kids get their own gadget based on the real Inspector Gadget from Disney's new movie. Each gadget is its own gizmo. Put them all together and they create one colossal crime fighter. Excuse me, sir, do you have the correct time? Why, yes, then I do. Did somebody say McDonald's? color sun squad with fairy blue groovy grape and bubble gum unprotected kid alert try sunblock that's fun block cool colors cool who are your cool friends banana boat whoa easy open capri sun now that's cool Capri Sun. Easy open, liquid cool. Coming at ya. Capri Sun by the pitcher. So whenever you want, you can make as much as you want. All-natural Capri Sun drink mix. First in draft, easy walk. Parents in bed, but it's just eight o'clock. That's why they taught you, you should always knock. Any ragu has grown enough stuff. Yeah, the ragu has been through enough. A long day of childhood calls for America's favorite pasta sauce. And action. Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? Again, please. Again? Again. Aren't thou bored? Yeah. Step into a Slim Jim. Turn to the spice. That baby juicy taste. Need a little excitement? Step into a Slim Jim. Hey, how about some Zoom Ball? Once you've played Zoom Ball, life seems a bit slower. Zoom Ball's the fastest glide you've ever tried. It's there and back in less than a second. Zoom Ball from Pressman. Hi, it's me, the Sound Playground guy. I'm having an emergency, an emergency moving sale. That's right, we're moving everything in stock. Everything must go. Every TV, VCR, microwave oven, every car and home stereo, air conditioner, and compact disc player. Drop what you're doing, come in now, and save like never before during Sound Playground's moving sale. See, I told you, we're moving everything. Are you ready for Hulkamania? It's you and Adonis. Looking good. Nobody beats Macho Man. You can get right in the action in the ring with Wrestling Superstars figures. The big names are here and they're ready. It's corner to corner excitement. Match your moves against the other guy. Have your own WrestleMania with all your favorite figures. Because you're in the ring with the WWF Wrestling Superstars figures. Figures ring and cage sold separately. Assembly required. It's a grand toy. I can beat anyone. What do you say, boy? What's the time? Slime time! What's the time? Slime time! These slimy-rigging creatures have some interesting features. They tell the time and sight that you'd even scare the teacher. What's the time? Slime time! What's the time? Slime time! Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. They're ugly, ugly, ugly, and they tell the time and slime time. Toad watch, snake watch, bat watch. What's the time? Slime time! Slime time watches sold separately from Hasbro. Last night, I journeyed backwards in time to the medieval world of Dark Tower. In this amazing game, I had to find three keys, lay siege to the tower, and defeat the enemy within. Each move was a challenge. The computer kept track, giving me secret information. Pictures, sounds, surprises. Then, ahead of my opponent, I made my move. The battle was joined. And I was victorious. Dark Tower. It's new for your kids. Laser light, laser light, it's Black Star. Defender of right, be ready to fight the evil overlord. Laser light, the ice castle is a mysterious place. He might meet the Lavalock face to face. Laser light, laser light, it's Black Star. From Galoom. Fox Kids, there's this magical realm where Irish myth lives, where four brave knights battle invincible odds. We must defend the people of Cairns. Some of which are real, and others merely illusion. This is entertainment. Catch epic adventure with the Mystic Knights of Ternanoke, today at four-thirty, right here on Fox Kids. Say listen, we're gonna do a little skateboard surfing today. Are you with me? Put everything on! Here we go! Out in California where the kids are cool, they got a way to get loose when they get out of school. Skateboard surfing. Skateboard surfing. Tell your ma, tell your pa, skateboard surfing's not against the law. Up in Mendocino, down in Monterey, Sacramento, San Diego, even L.A. Skateboard surfing. Skateboard surfing. Tell your ma, tell your pa, skateboard surfing's not against the law. Attitude to show your style You gotta be yourself Once in a while Skateboard surfing Skateboard surfing Tell your ma Tell your pa Skateboard surfing's not against the law Up in Mendocino, down in Monterey, Sacramento, San Diego, even L.A. Skateboard surfing, skateboard surfing. Tell your mom, tell your pa, skateboard surfing's not against the law. You gotta show your attitude and show your style. You gotta be yourself once in a while. Skateboard surfing. Skateboard surfing. Tell your mom, tell your pop, skateboard surfing's not against the law. Now remember when you're out there skateboarding or surfing, cover up everything. Wear a helmet. Cover your nose. Cover your toes. Knee pads and elbows. We want you around for a long time. Have fun. Remember. Yes. Skateboard surfing's not against the law. it's built to take shock enough plutonium to blow up all of new york and staten island for about four miles from the missile base boy bands were not so cute back then are they what hoodlum farmers a jeep no less come on let's juvie it up oh so it does work it's really too bad there's no possible way the jeep could drive around that car hey get that car out of the way It's a gang of rival nuclear scientists. What are you nuclear proliferating against? What do you got? You ruffians, don't you know science always triumphs? Isn't it like a jet to bring a knife to a nuclear war? They could drive around. Stop! There's a bomb in that case! Yeah, yeah! Nice Beatles cover. Coming soon to Weird and Wonderful Wednesday Watchalongs. I like this idea. Well, speak up. What do you want to say? I've come to claim the twenty pounds reward for Frankie McPhillip. Frankie McPhillip? Thank you. Oh, it's troubleshooting. Here we go. At first, some people report feeling the pulsation more in certain areas or more on one side of their face than the other. They become concerned the system may not be operating correctly. Again, assuming you are using enough gel, this is not unusual with one side of the face being more sensitive. This all definitely seems like a weird sex thing, right? Yeah, yeah. What if you used it on a different part of your body? I know. Someone is definitely auto-erotic asphyxiated. Yeah, before. Do you think anyone's doing more than one wife? I wonder. Some people might. It amazes me when we get at the end of class, I'll see people's paintings and how much extra things that they've put into their painting. You know, they get all these extra... Did you start yesterday? You know, it's... I don't know how they do it so... We do sometimes get paintings in advance if a student knows they can't make it, but they want us to show their work. We've had that happen a couple times. Ah, okay. I just love the wrestling theme. on the sand and uh and I still have memories of that of them like ah I'm getting sand in their eyes but that was just too much going on in the painting to get it done in this amount degree of another on the sunday late series great it's the world of the supernatural I haven't wanted to fast forward anything yet yeah suspenseful I have a feeling about that girl not anything she's done yet but something she's going to do something evil See Baffled, Sunday night at eleven thirty on four. Baffled. Nobody expects the Ironside Inquisition. Yeah, watching him walk around and do nothing is so much more interesting than seeing the killings by the monster. Will he walk into another room? Or stay in this room? Oh, my God, the suspense is killing me! Ay, ay, ay. I've got his cataracts. Oh, damn, marriage agrees with me. Oh, now I can't do the harp. Oh, Groucho, mirror scene. Well, that was a productive afternoon. This is like a real estate video. My dinner with Andre didn't have this many indoor scenes. Oh, there we are. Hello, everybody. Hello, hello, hello. hello hello hello hello hello hello hello hello hello is it us you're looking for oh yes is it see it in your eyes is it us you're looking for maybe perhaps we are are we gonna is one of you gonna be a blind lady who makes a creepy bust of us in your pottery class uh You never know. Guys, everyone's loving the new dumb emojis. Oh, cool. And someone, I don't know who started this, but there's something called Gigantify where you can make a giant emoji in the chat. I think you have to cheer. Use some of your bits to cheer in the chat. I've never sounded older in my life than just saying it. Put some cheers in the chat. Use your bits to cheer. This is getting like that Star Trek episode where they met the alien that can only speak in like metaphors and everything they said just made no sense if you weren't from their culture. And it was like, you know, like Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra and like everything they said was a reference. If you had told Mew like ten years ago that someday you would say use your bits in the chat to cheer, you'd be like, what the fuck does that even mean? So you can't tell here on StreamYard, but this Roddy McDowall emote is gigantic on Twitch. Oh, okay. It's a huge Roddy right there in the chat. Now, is it like JPEG quality, or is it kind of like... It looks pretty good. Okay. I mean, it looks pretty high-res, and we got all of them. We even have Big Ed in there, Matt. I don't know if you saw that earlier. Oh, yeah. We now have a Big Ed emote. For a split second, me and my girlfriend have been watching Twin Peaks a lot lately. When you said the Big Ed emote, I was picturing like a Big Ed Hurley who owned the gas farm in Twin Peaks. And I was like, what a random one person to have an emote of. But no, the better Big Ed who has no neck and uses mayonnaise in his hair. Yes. Oh, yes. But yeah, you can subscribe on Twitch. That'll get you all those emotes. And while we don't support Bezos or Amazon or Twitch, really, at all, you can also... It's a fun little perk there. Use your free Prime Twitch sub you get every month on our Twitch channel. then you're really sticking it to the man but you can also head to dumb industries.com super dumb bros and watch completely ad free in our super dumb bros super club right at our website there um and uh Oh, we should say what we're playing tonight, right? Have we even said what show this is? I get lost sometimes. Yeah, this is sort of our laid-back kind of show, so we need to think of a better intro here. But this is Super Dumb Brothers. This is our show where we get together every Monday, and we kind of just celebrate having survived the first day of the week together. It's very chill, very laid-back. We're just going to be playing some video games. Chris is going to be playing through more of the Walking Dead Telltale game tonight. yes we're continuing last week uh he had there was a lot of pillow based uh plot yes um and that I'm gonna need you let a lady die and a man who looked like the neighbor from office space like fought you or something I don't know jackie b raises a good point I feel like every show is pretty laid back No, some of them we have a big outline and, you know, and I have assembled clips to play at different intervals. And this is like, we just like show up. Well, I mean, we got to set up the video game and everything. Sure. And decide what we'll play and everything. How can should we be seeing a commercial break in the club no that means you're just watching we just embedded and now I'm remembering why we stopped embedding the twitch channel on the main page because people go there and think that they're watching in the membership which is you're not you're watching it on twitch just embedded on our website but if you head to the memberships drop down and hit the super club then that'll bring you right to the super club that's where it's ad free and you still get the twitch chat there I got two turntables and a microphone. And if you are looking to also contribute in a fun little way, we're always doing our live donation shout-outs. I was thinking today, there's a lot of fun TV-themed songs that are out there, and maybe I'll do some of those in my characters. Of course, there's a place for a prompt, so if you have a very specific scenario, which some of y'all are getting very specific with these scenarios. Yeah, I like it. It's kind of an interesting development, but if not, I will break out my characters and do a variety of theme songs for you. So that's what I'm feeling. But yeah, so we're just going to play some Walking Dead. We're going to hang out. We're going to talk. Anything new and exciting going on with you right now, Chris? um let me think what did I do I babysat over the weekend oh yeah oh we discovered my nephew's favorite pastime is just saying hi to people outside the window over here because I live on the second floor of a pretty busy street in queens uh he loves just saying hi and then hiding And then just he giggles for, you know, twenty minutes and then does it again. Nice. For a second, I thought it was like it was like, well-natured, like he was like an old southern lady. I'm like a rocking chair on a porch, just like say. But he's he's essentially doing like the the greeting version of ding dong ditching. Yes. We discovered he liked doing this a few weeks ago. And then this is the first time we had him over since then. And it was like, as soon as his dad dropped off, like left, the first thing he wanted to do was just run up to them. And he's like, let's go say hi to people outside. We just did that for like a half hour. um kids are kind of you know they're a lot of work but also you can kind of easily abuse them at times oh yeah and it's great too it's just so harmless we're just saying hi to people and he's like is this illegal and I'm like no you can say hi to people if you want he's seven years old by the way At worst, somebody's just going to be like, what? Nobody's just going to be hurt or anything. Maybe they'll think they had an encounter with a ghost. There's a lot of foot traffic here, so it's kind of perfect for him. He can just see someone coming. He says hi. The person looks up, and then he's like, I totally got him. Yeah. That's great. That's, like, my niece's favorite game last time I was down is something that she dubbed Heads in the Couch, and all it is is just me picking her up and kind of, like, shaking her and then just, like, throwing her at a couch from, like, two feet away. Yeah. And we will do that for, like, twenty minutes. Oh, yeah. That's great. I used to play a game where I would throw one of them out the window, and I wouldn't actually throw them out the window. I would just kind of pretend, like, I was like, all right, time to throw you out the window. And then I'd pretend like they were falling, and I'd go like, eh. I kind of miss being small enough that somebody can just like pick you up and just do goofy like that you know like I know I get those people that fetishize like a giant ladies you know now I think after having this discussion do you know about those types of people that white wait say that again like their sexual fetish is being with like a giant lady Like a giant? Like a Jack and the Beanstalk-esque giant, but it's like a lady and, you know, and like being like a teeny tiny person, you know, not also being a giant, but like being like a teeny little person that she like carries around. And sometimes it's very sexual, but sometimes it's just like, they just feel safe being with a, if a giant lady was just in charge of them. I think they just watched way too much Muppet Babies as a kid. And there's just this weird fetish they've developed. Just giant legs and a voice you can't even see the person they're so big. Oh, yeah. Anyway. We'll be having more witty banter like that throughout the night, too. So stick around for that. We have a couple of donations here already. So let's see. We got our first donation from Jackie B. Thank you so much, Jackie B. Jackie, thank you. Oh, and I completely forgot. It's St. Patrick's Day. Oh, yeah. I'm wearing my green hoodie. Oh, that's not green. That's like neon yellow. It's green. I'm counting it as green. That is not green. I have my blue light on here. It's pretty green. I have a stick now that I'm going to use to point to Matt. That is not green. That is yellow. You were just trying to start conflict. You were... But that's the kind of thing that would get you pinched. I mean, I'm not wearing green. You should be pinching me, really. Yeah, you're being awfully judgy for someone who didn't even try. But that's not green. It's just not green. It's yellow. It's like yellow-green. It's like halfway there. It's neon. Rushmore Yankee nailed it. It's highlighter. Anyway, St. Patrick's Day. I don't know. I don't own a lot of green clothing. It's an issue. I guess I need to rectify it. I don't think I do either. Yeah, let's change that. Let's become more green. It ain't easy being green. It ain't easy being cheesy. Okay, anyway. What do you think is harder, being green or being cheesy in the terms of it ain't easy? Cheesy, for sure. Being cheesy sounds like I think we should all strive to be more cheesy. yes it can't hurt but just okay he seemed like he was on cocaine or something he seemed like a cool guy anyway jackie says happy saint patty's day uh could we get a little rainbow connection in your favorite impression voice and go thank you for all the dumbness well thank you jackie b and happy saint patrick's day Yeah, happy St. Patrick's Day. Thank you. Let me... Can you do rainbow connection? Yes, I can. I'm just making sure I don't screw the words up. We've got another couple of really good ones coming up here. Okay, cool. Okay, so I think I can make this work as Gollum, probably. It's like... So here we go. This is for you, Jackie. This is Gollum singing Rainbow Connection. Why are there so many songs about rainbows? And what's on the other side? Rainbows are visions, but only illusions. And rainbows have nothing to hide. So we've been talking that was great hey matt look I got a windshield wiper that sucks I'm moving into prop comedy in case anyone hasn't figured that out. Yeah, you're going to open for Carrot Top. Thank you so much, Jackie B. Thank you, Jackie. That was great, Matt. Well done. We have another one here. It was a little pitchy, dog, if I'm going to quote Randy Jackson of American Idol fame. A little pitchy, dog. Once I get my voice a little warmer, I think we'll be cooking with gas. I love Randy Jackson. I quote him quite a bit. Yeah. Whenever, you know, I'm like, it's alright, it's alright. I wouldn't say it's the bomb. Or when he's like, it's a no-for-me dog. I say that like at least twelve times a day. It's a classic. I say a lot, Seacrest out. I miss, does Ryan Seacrest still do that? That's a great exit phrase, just to be leaving someplace randomly and be like, Seacrest out. Out? Yeah, American Idol coined a lot of good catchphrases. Yeah. We should have an American Idol night on Mystery Hour. can we do that could we pull that off I know they definitely had like compilation episodes of like the worst singers and maybe we could have one of those be an option for something soon like an intermission or something yeah yeah I used to watch a lot of american idol and that was like the show like I was on board man that was those first four or five seasons yeah I was always on board for like the first couple episodes because I just want to watch like the losers embarrass themselves and then once it became like good people I was kind of just like okay just let me know at the end on the news who won forklift yes it is still a thing except it's not on fox anymore I just discovered this it's on it's been on abc for like the past four years oh weird so it was the last american idol that anybody like really gave exactly I know like I think lionel richie's one of the judges now oh yeah there's a terrifying ad with him where he's like coming out of like a dressing room mirror at like a lady and he looks like he's like candy man or something yeah it's all strange uh we have another donation here this one comes from spirocyte thank you so much spirocyte spirocyte thank you and spirocyte thank you thank you thank you has requested carl singing the theme song from cheers oh that's good carl from sling blade singing the theme song from Cheers. Uh, okay. So, uh, I don't, it's kind of hard to say when you're, when you're doing Carl Spiro side, but I can try to, to talk you through something that might help you take your mind off your troubles. So, because I know that making your way in the world today takes everything you got and taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot. Wouldn't you like to get away? Wouldn't you like to get away? Wouldn't you like to get away for all those nights when you got no lights, the check is in the mail, and your little angel hung the cat up by its tail, and your third fiance didn't show? You know, and sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad that you came. You want to be where you can see, you know, just that our troubles are all the same, and you want to be where everybody knows your name, and they got that potted meat and them biscuits and gravy. How responsible would you say the sitcom Cheers is in someone's alcoholism just deepening worse and worse? Because they have that song in their mind. It's such a fun, whimsical time. I know. It's like, yeah, let's go down to the bar and get tanked. Isn't it funny and cute that these people are at the bar so often that an entire sitcom can revolve around them where they never leave the bar, really? Is that even a thing now? Because, God, like... When I drank, I used to spend so much money on beer, but in this economy, I can't even imagine. Do people still just hang out at bars all night? I mean, I don't know. I haven't been to a bar in quite some time. I go every once in a while. I live in kind of the part of Park Slope where there's like a ton of bars all around me. And I'll occasionally like on a Saturday night, like go out and have like a drink or two because it's I don't drink at home anymore, but I do like to just go out and drink and to feel social, you know, and exactly. And I understand band playing, you know, but I don't like the people who hang out enough to like where the bartenders know who they are. Like, like, I mean, like the people there kind of go like and kind of know who I am a little bit. Yeah. Well, I have. I mean, I've had quite a few locations that I, you know, I understand the cheers mentality of wanting to go where everyone knows your name. One hundred percent. But, you know, in the grand scheme of things, it's probably not the best situation to go to the same bar every single night and spend every waking hour there. I did date a girl briefly, and I'll tell you who it is after this broadcast. But like she because you remember her. But, like, she was, like, a regular at this bar, and we would, like, I would go to hang out with her, and she just always, like, when we, you know, got together, she would take me up the street to this bar, and we would spend, like, three hours there, like, every night, and she had, like, just this massive bar tab of, like, a couple hundred dollars. I'm like, good God. Yeah. Like, it's nuts. Yeah, not every night. Multiple times. Exactly. That's kind of where I landed. I was never, like, a bar fly, but I, you know, there's quite a few places I used to frequent. Yeah. and still would honestly but I you know the pandemic happened and then yeah well and you don't drink anymore too it's like I don't know yeah I do I don't really drink anymore but I do think it's fun to have like yeah a drink or two at a bar every once in a while it's gonna be a long one it's gonna be a long one yeah we're gonna it's uh you know we're just we're just uh we're just chilling up here we're just uh yeah let's go ahead and get walking dead fired up Well, let's do one more because this one involves both of us. Oh, yes. We have a couple more here. Let's do this one. This one comes from Teresa E. Oh, thanks so much, Teresa. Teresa, thank you. Teresa says, hi, guys. Please have Columbo interview Alfred about who is the Batman. Oh, I haven't done Alfred in a while. Good pick. Why don't you be Alfred crying at the grave and then I'll interview you at the grave. Excuse me, sir. I know this is a very sensitive time and I'm sorry to bother you at such an important moment. You seem very upset, but I just have to ask you, this Batman fellow you keep referring to, who might that be? Don't know who the Batman is. What is your name? What is your jurisdiction? Are you one of Harvey's boys? Uh, no. My name's Lieutenant Columbo, LAPD. Well, Lieutenant Columbo, I know a little bit about law enforcement. I once followed a gang of gym thieves in the jungle, and I saw a boy with a ruby the size of a tangerine. And then I burn the village down. So I'm aware of your line of work, but I don't know who the Batman is. I can't tell you who the Batman is. All I can tell you is if you ever have the chance to be the Batman, don't be the Batman. Please don't be the Batman, Lieutenant Columbo. And you see, that's the thing. You seem so upset about this Batman fellow, but you don't know who he is. I just find that a little, I don't know. It's a little odd, don't you think? Well, I mean, we can all be sad about the Batman. I was sad about Princess Diana. I don't know her personally, but she was England's Rose, and I don't think Elton John's going to write a song about the Batman. All right, well, how about I just throw some names out there, and if one of them's the Batman, you just tell me is the Batman. No, no, no comment. Okay, how about Elon Musk? Is Elon Musk the Batman? Yes. Well, there we go. Well, thank you, sir. That was it. Now, if you excuse me, I have to go back to warning. Morning, Master Bruce. I mean, Master Batman. I mean... Just to be clear. Goodbye. The Batman is dead, correct? Yes. All right. Thank you, sir. Just one more thing, sir. Oh, my God. This is really embarrassing, and I hate to bring it up to you, but I wouldn't be able to go back to my boss if I didn't ask you, sir. Are you sure Elon Musk is the Batman? A hundred percent. He was a friend of Master Bruce Wayne, who also coincidentally died at the same time. Well, that explains that. Thank you, sir. Okay. Thank you. I feel like that gif of Bart Simpson bringing out the at least he tried cake should have happened there. Thank you, Teresa. You're very sweet. We appreciate your support. All right, let's get into some Walking Dead, everyone. Yeah, let's get into it. It's a rough start to the week. Your eyes look a little puffy there. That's because I was rubbing them a lot because I was doing the Michael King. Oh, because you were crying. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. yeah please don't be the batman please please don't be the bat all right here we go please don't be the batman please don't be the batman we need to make up more cheerleading cheers for various things in life we do I live by those things don't you know like uh you know like uh Store brand cereal is just as good. I said store brand cereal is just as good. Uh, what one do we leave? Okay. Three, ten. That's one. Don't be anxious about your bank account. Don't be anxious about your bank account. If your cousin James hasn't gone bankrupt yet, then you're probably fine. Then you're probably fine. The various mantras I tell myself to get through the day, but just turned into cheers. I forget where we left off. I think we got to the back alley and I got the keys from that zombie. You shot the zombie with a pillow and you have a screwdriver now, I think, so you can stab the zombies with the screwdriver, I believe. Oh no, is it putting me... Oh my god, it didn't save it. Oh no. Well, some of y'all will get like a previously on here. We can go a titch long tonight. It's fine. I'm feeling real loosey goosey. Yeah, but we covered a lot of ground. Unless I'm just misremembering. This is... Maybe we're okay. We might be okay. We're like the Bates Motel. I just remember us starting in the hotel, so I don't know. We've been in this hotel for a minute. Meanwhile, on the David Lynch Highway. Yeah, okay. This is good. We're ahead. Yes, and Chris is going to be playing, so I will be manning the chat and generally just yapping at y'all tonight. Turn this up a little bit. I think I need to go. Oh, so this is Glenn's origin story, I guess? Again? Shut up! Because, yeah, because Glenn is the one who finds Rick at the beginning of the Walking Dead comic. Which I've been rereading those Walking Dead omnibuses. My library app has them all right now. And those first couple are pretty good. You gotta do what you gotta do. I never really cared for the show, but the book is pretty good for a long while. Yeah, I've heard that. And it just kind of went on too long. Did you check the glow box? I swear I saw it. Have you ever built dungeons where you Are you hearing like eight thousand voices talking at once? Yeah. Is that because there's like police in the background or something, right? So weird. It seems like they're just being a little loud for the zombie apocalypse. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, it's like... Yeah, there's supposed to be just, like, general chatter in the background, but it sounds like there's, like, uh... You, like, have schizophrenia. No problem. Voices in your head. We have to take care of each other. Yeah, we do. You said you wanted kids once. Uh, I did. Yeah. Well, she's not your daughter, so you can't treat her like she is. I'm gonna carry your baby. Yeah, I know that. But you can take care of her. Hell, maybe better than a father even could. Thanks, Kitty. I got your back, pal. I forgot to say our co-op game. Oh, yeah. Are we going to do a vote on it? Yeah, we're going to play a Jackbox game, but one of the other ones beside the t-shirt one. Not that that game's not good, but we feel here at the Super Dumb Brothers that we could use the variety. Yes. We'll put that poll in the chat in just a few minutes. What is going on with The Walking Dead show right now? How many of them are there right now? There's movies now. Is it still on? I don't even know. I don't know if The Walking Dead proper is still on, but there's weird prequel stuff. There's a show about the Daryl guy, and then there's a movie, I think, with Rick and the Michonne lady. Yeah, I see all the Subway ads and stuff, but I don't know. I know it's stupid. We just met. I mean, it's probably just a survivor thing. I really liked her. Yeah, I'm trying to think. You'll be alright. Yeah, I know. Anyway, I'd rather be alone, I think. I understand. Wait, Lee? What is it, buddy? How did you choose? I mean, we both needed you. You picked me. The game wouldn't let me choose the lady, or choose you, because... Yeah, I guess it doesn't matter. I just wish you would have picked her. It gave me the illusion of choice, like the Final Destination III DVD that supposedly let you choose your own adventure with who lived and who died, but it didn't actually work, so... It was just watching the movie, but with, like, cute little menus in between every death. Oh, man, check this out. The Doomatron had this minigun on his shoulder. It's all, like, pow, pow, pow. Walter Matthau? Uh, Danny says all I know about modern Walking Dead is there was a Rat King zombie I heard, where zombies in the mass grave fusing became a centipedish zombie. Spyro Sy said there was a Daryl spinoff and new one, The Ones Who Live. Is that what replaced Fear the Walking Dead? Is Fear the Walking Dead still on? I feel like I'm having a stroke when I talk about these things. How many shows can you have off of? Thanks. I know I need to be tough. I'm just sad. I know it doesn't make any sense, but it's how I used to talk to my mom and dad. And now they're gone. It's gone. Maybe we can find you another one. I'll just keep this one, I guess. Lee, come here for a second. Let me go deal with this. Oh, man. Clementine, another thing. Go talk to this allegory for a racist guy from... She's fine. Fine, huh? She's got a great ass. Well, just fuck you, Lee Everett. That's right. I know who you are, and I know you're a killer. Will you go near my daughter or step out of line once? And so will everyone else. I know who you are. This is creating quite the dramatic tension in our storyline. But if anything happens to my daughter or that little girl you've got with you, you watch your ass. No. Everyone is talking at the same time. It's driving me crazy. Aw, shucks. I hope that's the sound of us winning this thing. Me too. This Motorin's pretty damn defendable. We block off the entrances with some cars, keep someone on watch, we can stay here until the military rolls through. I actually agree with that plan. Me too. We got beds, we got water, and most importantly, we got light. There are worse places to call home. Yeah, you're right. You know, guys, I think it's going to be okay. It's gonna be great. That's how, like, everybody feels right now. We're just standing in this zombie parking lot, just like, it's gonna be okay. um kaija blue walking dead queen the original show is over dead city which is maggie and negan uh daryl dixon and the ones who live are commissioned fear is over okay so there are currently going like three shows is that the end of the chapter you and forty six percent of players lied you and four percent of players chose sean so I'm pretty middle middle of the road here I guess yeah everybody's real split I also like this country just split vote on everything right all right should we start the next chapter yeah fire the next one up I didn't know how many of them you had I think I got them all feels like such a waste having all because like I don't know these are fine but it's you know it's it's not the kind of thing that I could see myself getting super lost in that I would have to play all of them though I do keep thinking about getting that batman one kai just says dead city is intriguing because they hate each other so much but have to work together season two is coming soon wow I mean, it is a good, if you're going to, I guess, build a franchise, it's a good, it's the best kind of version of the zombie story that's been told so far. All right, so Daryl and Carol end up in Europe. How did they get to Europe? By boat? That seems like, that seems pretty far-fetched. How did they get to Europe? They take the boat from Jason Goes to Manhattan that transports him from Crystal Lake to, like, the Atlantic Ocean. If you haven't seen the movie, Jason goes to Manhattan. Very little of it takes place in Manhattan. Most of it takes place on a boat, and he gets on this, like, cruise ship because there's a boat in Crystal Lake, and he just gets on it and kills everybody. And then from there, he finds another boat in the Atlantic Ocean somehow and then gets over there and starts killing kids. Danny says Norman Reedus once cussed at them at a bar. Nice. Whoa. What did Herman say? Get out of my way. I'm Norman Reedus. I'm Norman. Get out of my way. You know how people just announce their name like that? Yeah. I'm Norman. I'm Matt. Get out of my way. Get out now. Get out of my way now. I don't even, I don't even know what Norman Reedus sounds like. I've never understood. I've never really understood the, the appeal of him. Maybe it's just because I just know a lot of greasy Southern men. And I guess, I guess I kind of am one. Uh, it's a. All right. New chapter. Here we go. New chapter. Blue Eyed Lady, just the chapter was over. But, you know, it takes a lot of people to make these games. It's the next chapter, like the Dr. Dre song. Yes, the next chapter. Is that what it's called? The next episode. Oh, it's the next episode. I'm sorry. I had a complete stroke right there. The next chapter. Just chill for the next chapter. It sounds cooler. I don't know. I think it's an improvement. As you can tell, I'm very immersed in hip-hop. So just chill to the next chapter. I like that. What is going on here? Hit zombie. Gotcha. Damn. What'd they get this time? Looks like a rabbit. Well, that's another meal lost. Is that Jared Fogle? It is. I still can't believe we went through all that commissary food in three months. I'm the only one happy about the downfall. I watched a documentary about Subway's downfall in the past, like, ten years. Oof. It's bad. Well, yeah. They've had it recently too because they... Their tuna's not tuna, apparently. There's no trace of tuna found in their tuna. I was going to bring up that they recently had a sandwich endorsement deal with this guy. Oh my god, I can't remember what his name is, but he's like a live streamer and he's got like a handlebar mustache and sunglasses. And a look that's completely different from my mustache and sunglasses look. But it's a, what's that guy's name? It's a... do you think kenny's having any uh live stream this is gonna bother me I have to between the lack of food and kenny and lily google this things are getting pretty tense back at the motor and What is that guy's name? Anyway, but there was, like, they had an entire sandwich named after a live streamer, and I think that that's crazy that we live in a world where a live streamer can have an official sandwich at Subway. But then it turned out that he was, like, chatting with underage girls on an app, so they had to basically send out, like, a cease and desist and tell people to just, like, trash all the standees and everything, like, immediately, and they'd already sank a bunch of promotion into it and everything. It's a... What is... Doctor Disrespect. Thank you, Crankor. Yeah, that's who it is. God, I was about to, like, lose my mind if I couldn't figure that out. Allegedly, I have to say, you know, it's, uh... Don't come after us. But it is true that they, you know, they dropped him as a spokesperson. There's actually, like, a great livestream of his where you can see, like, he's playing Red Dead Redemption, then he, like, looks at his phone, and then he just goes, like, stone-faced, and he's just, like, riding a horse in a circle around in the field. Like, you can tell he's got the news that he was being dropped from something, and he's just in shock. I love that. Shit! Was that Kenny? I don't know. Come on! You bastards. Spyrocyte says, what about the Dummering? It's a Subway sandwich. Chris, if we had a signature Subway sandwich, what would you want to go on it? I'm a real chicken kind of person, so as long as there's like chicken, cheese, and ranch dressing, those are all my favorites. Yuck. That'll be your sandwich. That'll be the Matt Subway sandwich. That'll be the Ichabod. Mine'll be the Colombo. It's just a... Maybe some bacon. Like an Italian sub. It's a bacon. With some chili over it. Interesting. Cranker says chicken feet and flip-flops. The faces keep getting weirder on these characters. Oh yeah, because your dad was special forces, that means that you have authority on how to personally get someone out of a bear trap. I think he was bitten. I think that's probably like one of my biggest weird fears is like somehow stepping in a bear trap I know it would never happen to me but uh why do people said bear traps well let's see you gotta trap bears somehow you know and a bear's big enough to just like you know murder you so why do you have to trap them okay Oh, how do I? What the? Hey. Yeah, it's so humane that this thing clamps around their leg and basically breaks it. You might as well just kill them at that point. I don't know. I don't think I've ever seen footage of a bear in a bear trap now that I think about it. It's always just used in a horror context because it's terrifying. Oh, I had to cut his leg off. I feel like a lot of times with bears these days, they just have cage situations and Bear traps are one of those things that movies made me think I'd have to worry more about like quicksand or being in the Bermuda Triangle, but I did nearly almost get lost in the Bermuda Triangle as an adult. I went on a... I was working for a science non-profit and they had this company trip where it's like they took all of us to Bermuda and I went on a jet ski tour of the Bermuda Triangle and because I was bad at jet skiing I fell behind the group and they kind of all got really ahead of me and I could barely see them in the distance and for a minute I thought I was about to get lost in the Bermuda Triangle. It seems very on brand. I can only go so fast because they're doing like a hundred on these things. Or I think we were all supposed to do like fifty. I think I'm exaggerating a little bit. Everybody's doing like fifty, but I was getting to about like twenty and that felt like I was going too fast. And they start skipping off the waves, the jet skis, and it was just all making me anxious, but yeah, my ass almost got left, because yeah, the tour guide, he took us to this place where there's literally, like, a ship that's, like, wrecked, it's like this old ship, and he gives it all of you, like, bread at the beginning, he jokes, like, this is your bread for if you get lost and you need to survive, ha ha, but then you get to the ship, and the bread is actually for you to drop it in the water pieces of it, and all these fish come out of the old wrecked ship, but after that, everybody just, like, zooms off into the distance, and I'm trying to keep up, and I'm like, I think I might need the rest of this bread, actually, like he said at the beginning. And, uh, but I eventually just trusted my gut and kept sailing towards the pinpricks on the horizon, and I caught up to them, and that's how I didn't get abandoned in the Bermuda Triangle at age... twenty-seven or something. Spiros I says two dudes I now have enough for a meme it's only Monday well good that Bermuda trip is also the reason why I don't think I can ever drink Gosling's rum ever again because there's just an open bar there and I guess like I don't know if like Gosling's was like sponsoring the resort or if it's just like the official rum of Bermuda or something but it's a we drink a lot of it I went on a booze cruise where it was literally just like an open ship thing. This guy that looked like Zach Galifianakis just told us about a variety of different goslings, lickers, and got us all tanked on the boat. It was a good time. Yeah. Ooh, Jaypo makes a good point. Any sandwich for Matt would be open-faced in honor of his feet. You know what? I do think that that is witty, so I accept your... your situation. Oh my god, my mom makes a great open-faced hamburger. Maybe I would do, like, that kind of recipe where it's, like, a piece of toast and then, like, cheese melted and then the burger. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm just, like, I've completely... You're talking about sandwiches. Come on, Lily. These are people. People trying to survive just like us. We've got to stick together to survive. The only reason you're here is because you had food. Enough for all of us. But that food is on the line. You had all your Subway sandwiches, Jared. And I don't suppose you guys are carrying any groceries, are you? Um, no. Why is your posture so bad? Welcome to the family, kid. Come over here and see what I drew. What? No, I... Fuck off, kid. You know, you like to think you're the leader of this little group, but we can make our own goddamn decisions. This isn't your own personal dictatorship. Your own personal. Ironic that this guy definitely would have voted for Trump. Yeah. But now that it's running out, suddenly I'm a goddamn Nazi. Lily's right. This group needs someone to be a leader or we're all going to fall apart. Actually, I voted for Gary Johnson. Great. Way to take sides, Lee. Look, they're here now. We can't change that. So, what do you want to do? They can stay until Katja finishes working on that guy. Then they have to go. I don't care what condition they're in. They have to get on out here. I don't see any of you stepping up to make the hard decisions. My girl's got more balls than all of you combined. Dad, please. Why don't you go help Mark with the walls? Sweetie, show him your balls. Got twelve of them. Balls of steel. We have all these Hot Pockets. Luckily, if they eat this Hot Pocket, it'll give them diarrhea, and then they can just eat the diarrhea. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. Four food item for ten hungry people. Oh, man, those cheese and cracker combo things, those were the jam when I was a kid. I want the crackers. The ones I really liked were the ones that came with, like, the wider cracker, and they all had, like, the little plastic thing that you used as, like, a tiny knife to put the cheese on top of it. Or should I give the food to? Got to be the kids, right? I think you should just eat both of them. What if I did that? Just cram it all in your face, just right in front of everybody. Where's your hat? I don't know. Can you help me find it? All we have are these Mr. Beast feastables for you to eat on. I had it a couple days ago. I promise. If I find it, I'll let you know. Thank you. Okay, Clint. I've got to take care of some things. Why don't you go back to playing with Duck for a while? Okay. Okay. Who's this little inbred boy? Where did he come from? Speaking of Sling Blade, he looks like the little boy. I like the way you talk. Oh my god. Oh god. He looks like the fucking dummy from Goosebumps. Can I eat it myself if I wanted to? Just cram it all in your face. Here, Clem. You need something to eat. uh oh you've also got other food that you can get apples thank you thank god no honey that was the last one oh don't get greedy enjoy it you deserve it eat the food how about this guy there's two pieces of food left you're not gonna feed the little hillbilly boy I gave him. I gave him the crackers. Oh, you did? Okay. He fed Hillbilly LG over there. I found this bull penis out in the parking lot. It's yours. Keep the last piece for myself. Yeah. Fuck them. Uh-oh. Bad move. Oh, you're a bad person because you didn't go full, like, savior mode on everybody. If you get sick, you can't look after people. You have to stay strong as well. You have to take care of your own oxygen mask before you assist others. I don't have a choice. Lee, Kenny, I know I ran out of food before. Hey, it was a tough time. Yeah, fuck that guy. That's what a real man does. Thanks, Kenny. Actually, I ate them all. I guess some people aren't going to be happy with your choices. Also, his name is Kenny, which is the most stereotypical, like, red... Oh, yeah. I fed the children and then myself. That guy kind of looks like Rodney Dangerfield a little bit. The white hair guy. Got a problem, man. Words getting out that you want to leave the motoring. Man Dog says it's going to be like the Oregon Trail. They're all going to die of starvation. Got room for me and Clem in there. Listen, I got to look out for my family. I got to know that whoever I take with me is going to be. This guy looks like a like a roadie for like Brooks and Dunn. You left Duck in danger twice. Well, the RV ain't even working yet, so there's no point in talking about it right now. Now, back when I was loading amps for the Allman Brothers, I learned a thing or two about surviving out here in the wilderness. I know that it is. I'm taking my family. Danny said, they took our gerbs. Yeah, it's that guy. They took our gerbs. This looks like an indie album cover. It does. I need a man. Did you watch Ozark? I saw clips, but I didn't really watch it, watch it. There's a character that multiple times throughout the season went, I want a baby. I just know about the one girl who says fuck five thousand times. Yes, I messed up the poll. I wrote Jackbox, but I meant Quiplash. Let me fix that. If you voted for Jackbox, it went towards Quiplash. That's not how democracies work. Democracy is so overrated. What's up, Lee? I'm out of food. I came here to specifically tell you I saved your life, but also I'm going to starve you. What are you working on, Doug? I've worked up a little warning system. It's called a flashlight. It's called a glory hole. If one of us all get on one side, and then the rest of you will come up on the other side. Think Katja can save that guy? Maybe. I mean, I know about computers, but that doesn't mean I can fix a calculator. But you probably could fix a calculator. Well, yeah. Good point. Take it easy, Doug. You too, Lee. Fucking Doug. Doug. Oh, soup. Her chair on top of that thing, all I can think of is the Mr. Bean episode where he fills his car up completely and then has a recliner on the roof and drives it from the roof. Wow. Alright, now what am I supposed to do here? Oh, maybe, should I look up what to do? Yeah, I've talked to everyone. I don't know what... Okay, what chapter are you on again? Two. Two. I may have just triggered something. Season one, episode two, uh... We did the chop his leg off, motor in. Leave it to Doug to rig up a warning system. Once all the food's been given out, a scene will play where someone who didn't get food looks sad. It is at this point that Lee goes back. Goes into check-in with Katya, who calls Lee and Kenny over. The person is saved. David or Travis has died because of their wounds. Lee will then get the option to say something to Katya, but is interrupted as David Travis reanimates as a walker grabbing hold of Katya in the process. I understand. Gotta be hard to make those decisions. Just give me next time. Lily's pretty pissed at us. Did any of that mean anything? I don't know. But nothing. She's making the smart choice. Those parasites you guys brought back need to go. It says the person who was saved, David or Travis, has died because of their wounds. And then Lee will get the option to say something to Kaia. No way I'm going back there. You saw what it was like when you guys picked me up. Completely overrun. Need any help with the wall? Nope. Actually, we could use your axe. You mind if we take it? Oh. Yeah, give us that thing for a bit. Should I give him the axe? Oh, should you give him the axe? Literally? Oh, should I? Should you give it to Rodney Dangerfield or Jared Fogle? Who should get our axe? Thanks. Yeah, give it to him. I don't trust the other dude. You didn't think to give me the axe? Hell no. This man reminds me of my grandfather. He knows you're just out to protect Lily. He told me so. Just like he's trying to protect Clementine. He... I just need some food. Going this long without a proper meal will make anybody cranky. Starve the kids. Fuck those kids. He didn't make it, did he? He lost too much blood. God damn it. I'm getting sick of this shit. Ken, come back. There's nothing... I'm sick of this shit too. You don't think I am? I don't know. Maybe it's for the best. We're already struggling to feed our own kids. That man you brought, I tried, but he was never going to survive. Well, at least he's not our problem anymore. What about the other kid? Oh, no. Oh, no. Get off of it. Yeah. No. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Get him, Jared. Wait, it's... It's like... It's getting all choppy. Kick him! Kick him! You gotta kick him! I'm trying! I'm trying! Oh, God. I got him! Like, the option to kick him's not... Oh! No! No! He nibbled on your legs. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You are dead. Oh, he's going to go all the way to the beginning. He's reminded me for some reason of the dad from Johnny Quest. Like, he looks like that guy. Like, I'm hitting the kick button and ain't doing nothing. kick em when they're up kick em when they're down kick a zombie kick em to the ground what stick? he was like crawling like seductively at you that didn't go so well no no it did not good job dumb dumb I got em I never really understood, like, that period in the two thousands where people were kind of romanticizing, like, a zombie outbreak and how great it would be to... Like, this just looks like it would suck. Alright, I'm gonna try this one more time and then we'll move on to our co-op game. Yeah, you made a lot of good progress. It's like the joystick doesn't really move properly, so I'm having a really hard time controlling it. Is it with the actual game or is it just your connection? Well, it's a little bit of both because I'm playing off of stream driving. Use the stick to get away. Use the left stick to get away. Your left stick, I guess. Oh, I see. You want to give it one more try now that you kind of know what's going on? I didn't understand what they meant by stick. I mean, come on. Come on. Use a different word. Use your words, watching dead game. Yeah. Left stick. You're like, yeah, is there a stick on the ground? Like... You gotta scoot your bum. There we go. Oh no. Ah, gouge his eyes! Oh, got me. I'm not good at this. Oh my god. Keeps making me go back to here. The chat is saying, I guess we're getting all the deaths in at once. Pyrocyte's like, hey, baby. Rushmore Yankee says, he just wanted to eat your ass. Serena, seventeen twelve, says, oh, he loves you. I don't want to hit you. I'm trying, dude. What the? Why are you... I don't understand. It seems like you're gouging pretty well. This reminds me of, like, Dragon's Lair. I don't think I ever played that. That guy kind of looks like Johnny Quest a little bit. A little bit, yeah. Is this entire game set in the Johnny Quest universe? Ah, there you go. How do I push it? Oh, okay. Good job. Thanks. Yeah, I don't think Walter Matthau would have been a great help there if he had the axe. I'm the boomer. Oh, they don't know. It's just anyone that dies. What the hell are you talking about? Yeah, that was like a big revelation, I remember. You come back no matter how you die. If you don't destroy the brain, that's just what happens. It's going to happen to all of us. God help us. It makes sense. In those first few days, it spread so fast. Car accidents, suicides, everything was making more of them. When I first saw it happen, we were all hiding out in a gym and everybody thought we were finally safe. But one of the girls, Jenny Pitcher, I think, I guess she couldn't take it. She took some pills, a lot of them. Someone went in the girls' room the next morning and... God. She took like eighty tons. it works of course it works thanks for the rules exposition boy green is seventeen twelve says just don't die problem solved I don't know if I want to live with the knowledge that I could just my body could be reanimated that sounds horrible they're not part of your group are they no Mr. Parker Travis and I were the last the last ones There's just two of them. We need to make a stand. No, we have a routine. We don't confront them if we don't have to. You all right? Yeah, just getting untangled. I don't know how you're still alive, man. Sorry, Lily. We gotta do this. That's far enough. Oh, shit. Okay, okay. No problem. You're outnumbered here. Just turn around and go back. Okay, that's fine. larry the cable guy is gonna come over now if you could part with some extra gas before we leave what do you need gas for our place is protected by an electric fence generators provide the electricity our generators run on gas look we own a dairy farm a few miles up the road if y'all be willing to lower your guns we can talk about some kind of trade I don't know shoot them dead kill them don't trust them at the dairy Lee, why don't you and Mark check the place out? See if it's legit. I'll go too. Send them to die. Spirosite says, asks Matt, would you download your brain into an AI and a dumb bot eventually? Uh, probably, I guess. I don't know. I've told Chris before that there's probably enough footage of us that you could put together like the movie Videodrome, just like a version of me where you just compile footage from everything. Sounds fair. A couple gallons should power one of our generators for a while. All right. Should we move on to our call-up game? Is it grub game time? Yeah, that seems like, I guess, a good place to pause. We'll come back to this. I still think you should have killed those guys. Anytime I have these games where it gives you the option of doing the good choice or the bad choice, I always choose to be the worst person possible in these. Like I've been kind of playing through Knights of the Old Republic a little bit in my spare time. And anytime I'm given the opportunity to be helpful or a giant asshole, I always choose the worst choice. All right, here we go. What should we play tonight? Let's see what the results are. Whiplash, Gaspinage, Rift Tracks, or Trivia Murder Party. Let's see. We should play Twister. Oh, it's a tie. All right. Someone's got to be the who's going to place the tie breaking vote. There's a hundred of you watching. Somebody else just hop on and... There it goes. There we go. All righty. Let's fire it up. Yeah, like, literally, like... Like, thirty-nine of you voted. I am smelling like a rose that somebody gave me on my... I am. That's a great like one of those parts of songs where you can just kind of sing it. You don't have to sing the rest of the song and people know what song you're referencing. I am. It's like that or like it's been some Okay, let me get my monitor set up over here for some Rift Tracks game. What's it's like? Everything okay? Yeah, no, I'm just setting up the game. It's rifttracks.tv. Yeah, everyone head to rifttracks.games. Oh, .games. I always get that mixed up. I'm going to put the code in the chat for, I know because there's like, there's, I think it's jackbox.tv. And then there's also rifftracks.tv, which is like just their website, I think. All right. I just gave you the code, Matt, whenever you're ready. Okie doke. Two seconds. Don't say it out loud while you are typing, Matt. You can keep words to yourself, Matt. Okay. I'm in. Tank, I'm in. Alright, everyone. Putting the code in the chat. I have hacked onto the web, Tank. I'm here. Head to rifftracks.games. Enter that code. this is gonna fill up fast but oh my god it's always so it's always so fast some of you are just like sitting there like ready to I bet you people are really good at like when there's a concert that goes on sale you know yeah uh like being in those queues and just knowing how to like hit the button at like the exact second I always do bad at those every clip has a spot to write My monitor always unexpectedly refreshes at the last second. I lose my place. One of our own professional comedy professionals at a slight point deduction. Everyone's riffs are played back and you vote for your favorite. At the end of all the rounds, the player with the most points wins. Round one. All right. Why don't you just tell Nancy and Jimmy who you are? no oh god it's better that they think I'm dead episode one murphy why don't you just tell nancy and jimmy who you are no it's better that they think I am dead this show looks amazing I've never seen this that looks awful um okay I feel mildly good about that. That's a good start. We want a good warm-up. Good, good, good little warm-up, you know? You know. I'm trying to think what else interesting I've been up to. Inga and I have been re-watching, or she's been watching for the first time. We've finally arrived at Twin Peaks Season Three. We just started that again. Oh, nice. So good. And we've also just been playing Super Mario World a ton, so that's what I've been. Oh, the original? Yeah. No. It's better that they think I am dead. My penis looks like this, too. Don't look. Murphy, why don't you just tell Nancy and Jimmy who you are? No. It's better that they think I'm dead. Now somebody feed me some Oreo cookies. Oh yeah. Robo wants an Oreo. Why don't you just tell Nancy and Jimmy who you are? No. It's better that they think I'm dead. Is he crying? We're sorry, Mr. Kissinger. We had to make you a robot. Murphy, why don't you just tell Nancy and Jimmy who you are? No. It's better that they think I'm dead. no one must know I'm elon musk reed d-i-c yeah I was trying to think of who it reminded me of murphy why don't you just tell nancy and jimmy who you are no it's better that they think I am dead we tried being a throuple and things ended badly A throuple. A throuple. That sounds like what someone in the Netherlands would call being in a throuple. Would you like to be in a throuple with me, huh? We're gonna have a throuple. Me and the throuple are gonna go down to the orgy later. My apartment is three blocks away. Me and the throuple are gonna go have some spank spank. Just a vague Eastern European accent. If you guys are watching this live, you can also vote in the chat. Just got to put the number number in the chat there. Connects pretty cool, huh? I think you can then also help pick, uh, clips for a future. The throuple is going to be the name of my open face sandwich. The throuple. Yes. I like that. I'll have a throuple. No mayo. Or like a throuple sounds like a creature from like a Land of the Lost type show that would show up for like one episode. Like, oh no, it's the evil throuple. Or you would know Gargamel from the Smurfs or something. Do do do. That is a good one. You know what he reminds me of now I'm thinking? He reminds me of Danny DeVito in that one It's Always Sunny episode where he's like naked and he's all lubed up. He's like, I just want to be pure. Alright, I'm in the second place. Me and the throuple are gonna go celebrate with this throuple later. You fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin, brother. You're off the project as of right now. Let me tell you something, mister. You fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin, brother. Brother. Brother. You've seen the clip? Now enter your rift. Oh, the creepy doll. That's an intriguing prospect. There's a creepy doll in the bottom corner. When me and the throuple make spank spank together, we turn the creepy doll toward the wall. Because if she watches us, she's possessed by the spirits of all the throuples before us. yeah it's time for rift oh my god this is so long what your riff no just uh it's a it's rare that sometimes I know exactly what I'm gonna write right away and I don't realize how long this is oh yeah extended out to Al Canox says the unfortunate thing about the Robocop series is that for budgetary reasons, they couldn't do a lot with them. Have we ever watched the Robocop cartoon on any of our programs? I think we did. I know it's definitely been an option before. Or maybe it was Rambo. Maybe we didn't watch Robocop. I legitimately can't remember what we have and haven't watched sometimes. I know, sometimes I look at old episodes and I'm like, I have no recollection of watching this at all. But that cartoon for RoboCop was great, and there's even an episode where Clarence Boddicker, you know, the dad from that show, Yeah, we did watch RoboCop. Thank you, people. See? This is exactly why you're off the project. Stuff like this, Doug. the project as of right now let me tell you something mister you fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin brother dog the bounty hunter and his crime fighting t-h-r-o-u-p-l-e I'm in a throuple with all the bounty hunter let me tell you something mister you fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin brother baba boy You're off the project right now! Let me tell you something, mister. You fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin, right? That's so fucking hot. You're off the project right now! Let me tell you something, mister. You fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin, brother. I get royalties for the phrases I coin, right? It's my retirement coin. You're off the project as of right now. Let me tell you something, mister. You fire me and I'll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin, brother. Yeah, I'm fully aware I just gave Matt another fetish to think about. He's kind of flubbing that line. It's weird. If you fire me, I'll be hotter than a guy who's in the palms of a giant lady and then is later either put inside her mouth or other orifice as a tiny person and has to go spelunking until they get lodged inside like the man that died in the Nutty Putty Cave. Are you still there? It is my sexual fetish to be swallowed by a giant lady and then to get lodged and die in a way like the Nutty Putty Man. Yeah, that's a bright, cheery topic to talk about. Do you know about the Nutty Putty Cave incident, Chris? I don't. There was this guy, he was, like, spelunking, and he, like, went into a crevice that hadn't been explored before, and his head, he got, like, lodged upside down in this crevice, and then, like, they couldn't get him out, so they just had to, like, hole up the cave, and, like, he's still there. Oh my god. That's insane. Like he died from just being upside down from too long and all the pressure being put on him. I don't understand the cave diving. That shit makes me so anxious. I know. That's another one of those things like quicksand. Every time I watch it, I'm like, oh my God, that makes me. But the good thing is, is you never have to do it. Exactly. Exactly. It's an entirely avoidable problem. Or being buried alive. That always freaks me out. You see? You see? You're stupid minds. Stupid. Stupid. He hit him so hard his face turned green for a second. You see? You see? You're stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid! His face does turn green. Okay. Take a deep breath and enter your rift. I'm going to write this joke just for Chris. This one's for you, Chris. Yeah, what's going on? There's like a man in the middle who's like, he's like a little testicle thing with like tree arms. He looks like the tree thing from the Twin Peaks season three. Oh, yeah. No springs. Yeah, are we going to get to do our takes on Coily now? We'll have to include this episode now when we ever reissue that box set. No springs. No springs. Everyone should get the No Springs t-shirt designed by Josh Flowers, by the way, which is available at dumb-industries.com. I am stuck on springs, but springs aren't stuck on me. Yeah. It does look like the Martian from the Flintstones, like a live-action version. Oh, yeah. The Gazoo? He went to the Natalie Cuomo school of handling hecklers. Thank you, Matt. Thank you. Thank you. Your stupid, stupid purple satin outfit. Take some of that. Smack. You see? You see? Your stupid minds. Stupid. Stupid. A governmental worker finally gives one of those doge dweebs what they deserve. You see? You see? Your stupid minds. Stupid. Stupid. It's dumb. Dumb Industries. you see you see your stupid minds stupid stupid my fist has an iq of five charlie murphy what the five fingers say to the face you see slap your stupid minds stupid stupid I told you that in confidence that is good okay good use of the sound effect there stupid industries you know I did consider naming it stupid industries at one point no I didn't stupid incorporated not that that would be any worse or better really that should be like our our rival company we'll we'll do like an andy kaufman-esque uh rivalry between us and a fellow we already did that stupid dumb buster's video we abandoned that concept kind of like half of the way through it uh Stupid Incorporated. Well, fuck all the people at Dumb Industries. I hope they drink my pee. I'm gonna set their building on fire. This is not an admission of arson. Noel. Nice. Well done. Nice. Very nice. That'll get everybody to clear out if I start doing Borat. Danny in the lead, as usual. Wait. Is that the same puppet from that other show? It's just like a pretty standard Punch and Judy doll. Yeah, I think it's probably more of that situation. His hands were dirty. And his hair was messy. But Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. Time to bring the funny. Enter your riff now. Eric McKeddon says, I'm announcing the formation of Stupid Television Incorporated, STI, as a rival to dumb television. Who wants to be my angel investor? Mandog? Just call me angel. Well, imagine if Mandog funded like a rival company for us called Stupid Television Incorporated. And we can also have stupid television development, which is, you know, the research wing of the company, or STD for short. J-Pose has very dumb industries. Hmm. That'll be what we change the name of the company after, you know, we get in trouble for securities fraud, all that stuff. After we're ousted from our company and a, and a Steve jobs from the takeover, we have to form our version of next computer dirty and his hair was messy, but Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. And yet you all voted for him for president. Boo. What's so funny about that? His hands were dirty. The kids are going, they're losing their minds. And his hair was messy. I think kids were easier to entertain. But Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. Mr. Bungle didn't even change out of his flip-flops before he headed to lunch. His hands were dirty. And his hair was messy. But Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. After rubbing out a quick one in the boy's room. Nice very suave delivery. His hands were dirty. And his hair was messy. But Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. I want to lock Betty Crocker in the kitchen and knock her upper during supper. Clutter up her butter gutter with a hostess ding dong. His hands were dirty. And his hair was messy. But Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. Wait, but we just came back from lunch. His hands were dirty. And his hair was messy. Yeah. But Mr. Bungle didn't stop to wash his hands or comb his hair. He went right to lunch. Finger P-A-P-P-I-T. I don't know if I get that one. Finger Pappet. Oh, Finger Pappet. Finger Pappet. finger puppet strange riffs tonight this is my this is this was my attempt to make make a new egg happen and it didn't work oh really finger puppet finger puppet there's a meme with like a weird little girl with finger puppets on the outside and the caption says finger puppet and I always just randomly think of that Egg. Egg. Egg. Yeah, sharp doggy. Egg. Egg. Egg. Maybe that's how we should protest and get the price of eggs down. We should just all go to our grocery store and just kind of like, you know, mildly chant, Egg. Egg. Egg. Egg. Toward the eggs. And maybe they'll eventually reset them. One guy. One guy likes finger pappet. Egg. Egg. Egg. Egg. Egg. Egg. Inside the filtration plant, chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs. Inside the filtration plant, chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs. Are you the next top riffer? Enter your riff. Oh yeah, do we have any more donations or anything? Oh, I think we do have one more. Let me write this riff. Hold on. This song makes me feel so happy I don't think about walking into traffic when I listen to Scott music like this song even Peter kind of agreed that it sounds like Scott and it makes me happy and like I don't want to eat bad food and have food poisoning okay what we got for oh yeah uh okay chris Okay, Grim Grinner. Thank you so much, Grim Grinner. Grim Grinner, thank you. Grim Grinner says, I'd love to hear Columbo and Gollum bring us the Golden Girls theme. Thank you for being a friend. Thank you, Grim Grinner. Let's wait until after this. Inside the filtration plant, chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs. Harmful germs that are about to make an epic comeback. Inside the filtration plant, chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs this man santo brand leaded asbestos water cleaning product makes our town's water so fresh and crisp inside the filtration plant chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs old man herman sloughs off plenty of dead powdery skin to keep our water clean and drinkable inside the filtration plant Chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs. We call this powdered matte toenails. Just add one. Flip-flops optional. Inside the filtration plant, chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs. My feet are beautiful. And you folks at home may know this. Inside the filtration plant, chemicals are added to the water to get rid of harmful germs. My piss will be ready to drink in no time. Here we go again. Oh, I'm a sucker for a good piss joke. Just a little piss baby, aren't you, Chris? I like piss. I like piss. I like piss. I like piss. I just want some extra time with your do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do piss. I think I want a drink of urine. Why did we now never do a parody of Kiss by Prince but called Piss? You don't have to be everywhere. You don't have to be hydrated. I'll drink any kind. It can be dark yellow or look like fucking cyanide. Piss. You gotta know that. Wow. Wowie. Wowies, wowies. Wow, golly gee willikers. That should be a riff I just do in the future, just like golly, that's the whole thing. Danny. You did it. Way to go. Danny always kills it at riff tracks. Uh, Danny says, please send me the footage from this episode. I'll make you a social media clip of Prince's piss. All right. If you, if you think, if you think our audience will like a power, I think we should do a full parody of kiss, but piss. You gotta know to hover over my mouth and piss right inside. I don't want it from the toilet bowl. I'm like one of those kids that puts their mouth on the water fountain, if you know what I mean. What do you mean? Piss. Thank you, everyone, for hanging out with us tonight. Always so much fun. Yeah, thanks for hanging out. Join the free Super Dumb Bros Super Club. Are we on the wrong side? There we go. Join the free Super Dumb Bros Super Club over at dumb-industries.com. Get on our newsletter, dumb-industries.com slash newsletter. Join our Discord server, everyone. That's where it's at. And follow us on Blue Sky. That's also where it's at. Yeah, and I'll be firing back up dumb television here in a bit. I'm going to be doing all Frank Gorshin-related shows that we have. Oh, nice. It's going to be Legends of the Superheroes, Death Car on the Freeway, and The Wonder Woman with him in it. Oh, I forgot. Right, he was in Death Car on the Freeway. Wait, what was the first thing you said? The Legends of the Superheroes. He plays Riddler. That's right. So, yeah, so that's going to be happening. And tomorrow, of course, is movie Joe Knight, Baffled. Oh, Baffled. Getting all that together. I can't wait for that. Everyone, join us right back here. I can't wait to be Baffled. On Twitch. By Baffled. And, of course, in the Mary Jo Peel Show Clubhouse for Baffled tomorrow night. And what are we doing next week on this program? We are diving into Ghostbusters. Oh, yeah. And you actually picked up the new game, so we're going to be able to play some of that. Well, it's like the, you know, it's like fifteen years old, but it's the Ghostbusters, the video game. Yeah, we'll play that. We'll probably, I'm going to dive back because there's some older Ghostbusters games, too, for like older systems we can sample a little bit. yeah I'll play so it'll be both of us kind of playing for that so uh and uh and we're gonna be doing oops all wild card on thursday on mystery hour so uh we've been discussing that earlier today so we got we got some some big stuff coming up but thanks thanks for hanging out everybody this has been a lot of fun I feel like yeah it's uh it's been a it's been a monday but it's you know Monday but it's also been a Monday but I like I love Mondays now because it ends with us all hanging out and playing video games together it's been pretty nice I've found a throuple to be a part of we went ninety hectares back to my apartment and now we're a happy throuple you guys are the best thank you everyone for hanging out with us tonight we love all of you thanks everybody we'll see you tomorrow night movie tonight everyone Seacrest out. Gersbeck out.

It’s officially Daylight Savings Time which is slowly killing Matt & Chris but that doesn’t stop them from diving back into the Telltale game The Walking Dead to fight some zombies and grab some pillows! Plus: to celebrate MAR10, the Super Dumb Bros. play a couple rounds of Mario Kart w/ viewers!

Transcript: Looney Tunes will be right back after these messages. Hello, my Koopas! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! Koopa! I'm King Koopa, and today is Kids' Rights Day! Yay! We all believe in kids' rights, and I got a box here full of kids' rights. It's completely full of them. This box full of kids' rights. Wait a minute. These are all kids' lefts. Dammit, lefts! They're only left. Left-handed seat. Left-handed. That's... Okay. Time to give a children's giant atlas of the universe to the trooper in the magic seat! Watch out. Ratso, the card, please. Hiya, Ratso. How are ya? Nice to... No, no, don't pull me! It always pulls me. Red Seven! Yay, you're Red Seven! How you doing, trooper? What's your name? Billy. Billy! Are you a trooper, Billy? I got an atlas for you, Billy. I got an atlas for Billy. Here it comes. Here it comes. Look at this! Is this big? Yeah! Say hello to Mom and Dad! hi okay take the answers yay billy what is it now it's my right as a big kid who never grew up to play the cartoons I want and if I don't I hold my breath till I turn pink here's all's well and it will be if I get my way I'll be back with more prizes and more cartoons That was great, kids. That's nice. What are you, from Biafra? I don't know. It's all tough with your... I am the Apostle Paul, though my mother called me Saul, I wrote much of the New Testament that much is true, but it was on the road to Damascus that I began to see, though first blinded, his wounds now healed on me, Peter you shied away from what you said you'd do, your sneakers ran, not stood, when you said you would, choosing flight for convenience, you ground you did not stand, when Jesus needed you most, you fled, when he bled, the cock rode thrice before the Morning, son. Confirming to the world all you had done is run. Unable to stand strong in the test of fire, doing what is hard, you weltered and failed, fleeing from his guards. I am Peterson would call me The Rock. WWF choosing my nickname seemed a little bit insane, but I digress for intensity I do not lack. For everything I do, I seek take nothing back, when he called me out to walk with him on the water, I jumped and leapt into the waves I saunter, while Paul it's true that later, you did much good, that early you murdered, a bit like Robin Hood, though well educated, I'm certain that you are, you used your talents for evil, like a ruthless. Sam, it's good a miracle sent to blind you, in order that you might see that God is majestic and all the more glorious to be. Ozzy? Yeah? Do you have a secret fantasy? Yes, I'd like to fly to New York for a colonoscopy. Enter the CBS Cares colonoscopy sweepstakes. If you win our grand prize, we'll fly you to New York for three nights at a luxury hotel, watch the sunrise over Central Park, then kick back, relax, and enjoy a complimentary colonoscopy. So what are you waiting for? You can't win if you don't enter. Visit cbscares.tv. CBS Cares, making your fantasies come true. Man, I went to this bar in Nashville. This band was playing Kelly's Heroes, a great guitarist, best guitarist I've ever seen. And they were playing old country music with a heavy blues rock twist. So they do this great version of Ghost Riders in the Sky. And this brilliant guitarist just goes way out on a limb. And everybody in the crowd, it was so fun to be there. They're just thrilled to death. Because they're watching this man doing the same thing that surfers do. He's like dancing on the edge of chaos and order. In this virtuosic manner. And everyone is so taken by that that... It just lifts them out of the normality of their existence. You see this joy just transfuse them and that's because they got an intimation of genuine meaning. Is he seducing me? What am I, a bed bug? In the cities, in our houses, bedbugs have found a place to live. These little creatures infest our dwellings. They could hide any place in our apartments, but the place they love best is our beds. Bedbugs have penises like knives. Females don't need any genitals to mate. Stab me. Chase me. Mate with me. Seduce me. He is so strong and sharp. He doesn't need a vagina at all. He ejaculates in my wound. Via my bloodstream, the sperm will travel on their own to my ovaries. In two weeks, five hundred eggs would hatch. And the baby bedbugs would feed on the blood of whoever sleeps in the bed. Gozo! Well, today is my birthday. I'm just thirty. I'm just thirty. Well, I guess that means that next year, you'll be thirty-one. Good luck. Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na-na Na na na na na na na na Thank you. Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na. Thank you. And finally, you've probably seen this video or something similar all over your timeline. I know I've seen it. We're shaking our heads at this man who decided to spend fourteen thousand dollars to transform into a dog. So he's still a mammal, y'all, but Look at this. Not rolling over. Like, for real. The man who goes by Toko says the collie costume has helped his dream come true of becoming an animal. You've been an animal, just not that kind of animal. He has been posting videos of the suit in the suit, rather, on his YouTube page for about a year. But this was his first time going out in public. Let me know what you think about it. Does it look real? This is the part I was waiting on. The other dogs like, no, fam, this don't look right. Use that hashtag, I am up. What say you, Greg? I just have nothing to say about that at all. And it's, like, really? Wow. I cannot. Mine! Ain't no shame Ain't no blame No one's sane All the time Raise some cane Make it right Don't need money Gonna rock you all night Wanna rest, baby Don't wanna fight Down, down, slow mama Every day and night Face your pain Make things right Don't need money Gonna rock you all night When you need some help, just call to the man up above The only thing you're about to get is true love When you're feeling down And you want some love Always keep in mind To do the pretty right job Hey, they're on the set of Arsenic and Old Lace. Yeah, I like the decor. Mid-century grandma. Well, someone's home. They're playing the piano. By the way, this whole scene was improv. Hey, turn your flashlights off. We don't want any extra light in this film. This movie is like if John Wick had rheumatoid arthritis. And glaucoma. What's this movie about again? I have no idea. Well, there's a chandelier. Why not bring Liberace in? That'll cheer things up. Have we mentioned how great the soundtrack is? Let's try to focus on the good things. Welcome back to Catatonic Caper. Uncut gems didn't have this kind of tension. The one-eight-hundred got junk people are sneaky. Coming soon to Weird and Wonderful Wednesday Watchalongs. Pretty, isn't she? The third largest city in the country. And she's quite a lady. Kind of peaceful, too, in the warm, friendly light of day. But when the light goes down and the city is dark, its back streets and brooding alleys become a jungle. And its denizens stretch out their claws of violence from the shadows. That's where I come in. Sims, homicide. Because murder is my business, and midnight is my beat. And it takes me to the real story behind a thousand front page headlines. Sometimes to the savage fury of a report that begins when a man's life is ended. And so the word goes out along the city's vast network of communication. Killers loose, ready to kill again, dragging innocent lives with them in a reckless pattern of flight as they try to hide in a city stripped naked where there is no escape. But the wheels of the law's machinery grind hard and the long arms of the department stretch out, girdling the city, drawing the steel net tighter and tighter. Oh, my God. This trip to Bermuda. We'll fly you and a guest from Los Angeles for a week in Bermuda at the elegant Elbow Beach Hotel. Look, it's the captain and Tennille. Enjoy the sparkling clear ocean, famous pink sand beaches, superb dining, entertainment, starlit skies where memories are made furnished by the Elbow Beach Hotel. It's normally priced at... I already paid my tab. No, you didn't. Yes, I did. No, you didn't. I'm leaving with my drink now. I want to see the skeleton try to drink the drink and he just pours it all over his mask. Greetings, children! Have you ever wanted to torment your toys in the hellfire of agony and defeat? Well, look no further, because there is a new Brother Ichabod doll coming this fall from hell! Don't think so. He has no eye contact. Crush all your foes under your feet before sending them off to their eternal doom! Yes, let's go! Stomp Iron Man into the dust! Throw Barbie onto a barbecue! The Brother Ichabod doll even comes with its very own shamien! A shamien! So you too can experience the joys of being a single parent of an estranged child! The Brother Ichabod doll is available now at Little Demon Toys, Fires and Fun, Build-A-Ghoul Workshop, and Kmart! We love our Brother Ichabod! Order today! Mahel Inc. is not responsible for fires caused by playing with the Brother Ichabod doll or any demonic presence that takes over your home and or husband. This is coming from our clubhouse chat from Mrs. Torgo. Mary Jo, where would you take Roddy on your first date? straight to my sofa for a makeout session. Oh, Cal, I don't know. He's rather continental, so I would probably take him out, if it were in Minneapolis, for martinis or go the complete opposite way and take him on a hike to Minnehaha Falls or something like that. He'd love that, I'm sure. Yeah. Where would you take him, Chris? Where would I take Roddy McDowell on our first date? I don't know. Maybe a movie. Maybe we'll go just take a stroll in the village. Go to some antique shops. Oh, nice. I think a theater date would work well. Yeah, go see it. We'll go see the new Glenn Gary, Glenn Ross. Yeah, I'd love to see that. Nobody expects the Ironside Inquisition. Yeah, watching him walk around and do nothing is so much more interesting than seeing the killings by the monster. Will he walk into another room? Or stay in this room? Oh my god, the suspense is killing me! Aye, aye, aye. I've got his cataracts. Oh, damn. Marriage agrees with me. Oh, now I can't do the Harpo Groucho mirror scene. Jimmy Lee Curtis is in there. Well, that was a productive afternoon. This is like a real estate video. My dinner with Andre didn't have this many indoor scenes. hello hey how's it going everybody hey bud how you doing good how are you doing everyone out in twitch welcome welcome everybody twitch and dumb nation all are welcome all are welcome crossover crossover it's that tiny lady from poltergeist said it's all right jesus loves you he told me so have you ever seen american movie greatest movie ever made I've seen clips from it I don't think I've ever seen the whole thing but I know I think I've seen the part where he takes his mom into the woods but like it's a great movie I still don't even know if it's real or not something about it makes me think it might not be real but Well, we can maybe discuss that later tonight at some point because this, of course, is Super Dumb Brothers, our stream where we get together and we play some video games. But more importantly, we kind of just bullshit around. We talk. We catch up with all of you. It's a good hang to begin the week, and this week has began on a doozy. It's daylight savings time. I just felt like shit all day. I'm not nearly as together for show night as I usually am. Usually I like to get a shower, you know, and be nice and clean. This is probably the grossest I've ever been on stream physically. You've definitely been worse. No, I'm just kidding. No, the hour, it's so weird how much an hour makes a difference. But yeah, my problem is... I forget this, but there's like six clocks in our apartment that don't automatically jump forward. So I've been like all day resetting them. You're afraid that you're like gaslighting yourself because you're like, did I actually reset this one or do I need to still? Six clocks is a lot. This stream is clean. Oh, happy Mario Day. Martin Day. Happy Martin Day. My favorite show off of the original lineup of Fox. Yeah, someone said we're not in a Discord server. They're like, oh, you guys aren't playing Mario on Mario Day. Because we're playing The Walking Dead tonight. Not so, though. Yes. You're wrong, Spider-Man. Because we will be playing tonight. We'll be doing some Mario Kart for our group games, so. Should we do all blue shell? I think we should do at least one round and all blue shell round because that was hilarious and great. It was so great. Or maybe we could pick another kind of like a weird, another power up or something. Another weird power up to throw in the mix. But yeah, so we are celebrating. Do like blue shells and bananas. So the entire course is just like a nightmare to drive across at all times. Yes. uh rush more yankee no mario games ever drop in price ever they sometimes do I think some I think mario wonder is actually on sale right now if you guys haven't played that oh yeah I think I saw that too that's never the ones that I want to be on sale I know I think last mario day I got luigi's mansion three for like forty bucks or something that was cool yeah but yeah they they generally do not lower the price of the mario games I keep waiting on them to just drop the price for that Link's Awakening remake or the Echoes of Wisdom remake because they're both games I really want to play, but they're just so fucking expensive for what are essentially like Game Boy games. I just can't pay sixty bucks for a video game. Like, I know I'll beat it in a weekend tops, you know, I can't justify that much money. I wish blockbusters were still around so you could just go and like rent a video game and just have it for the weekend. And, you know, and someone needs to make up a like a I know there's like Xbox Live and stuff like that, but something where you can just have like an entire game for a couple of days, like like when you rent a movie on Apple TV, you know, you can either buy it or you can just like rent it for a week. Yes. Let us do that, Nintendo. bring back blockbuster bring back blockbuster bring back family video they were like blockbuster weird adult video section in the back when people are nostalgic for blockbuster I'm like okay but it's like blockbuster killed that in the first place yeah people hated blockbuster when blockbuster was a thing it's only kind of been in the last ten years that they've kind of anything But anyway, we'll be talking more about crap like that tonight, and we'll be playing the Walking Dead Telltale game, some more of that. This has been our month of diving into games that we've already previously done. Yeah, we started this back in October. We were doing all spooky games. And yeah, this is we got like, I don't know, a little bit into the story. I don't know how much, but we're just going to pick up right where we left off. I think I'm at a gas station with some people. You spent like nine hours looking for like a key, I think, last time. I'm at a gas station with a bunch of strangers. I mean, it's pretty much every episode of The Walking Dead. So we'll be playing that. You go somewhere, you meet an unscrupulous cast of characters. Everything seems idyllic. The zombies get in. Maybe not everything is as it seems. um so yeah and also I just want to remind folks you can head to dumb industries.com super dumb bros and uh watch tonight's program completely ad free if you uh want to stick it to bezos and amazon to the man you can go there watch the same program still have access to the twitch chat you also get the secret chat which I can confirm is better for the environment I got the reports back. Well, all that Bitcoin mining we've been doing, though, has really been kind of just making it sort of a net, you know, zero. Yeah. We're going to introduce the dumb coin soon. That's our next. We're going to be like the Hawk to a girl, and we're going to announce our new coin. And then we're going to get accused of fraud. No. Also, if you head to dumb-industries.com slash donate, if you send us a donation of any dollar amount throughout tonight's program, we'll give you a shout out. In the form of one of our past terrible impressions. I'm so good at pointing stuff now. Yeah, look at that. I feel like Vanna White, or like a weatherman. Yeah, dumb rug pull time. We're going to hype up this dumb coin, everyone. Hype the shit out of it. Then rip all of you off. That's pretty much what the scam, right? They just like talk up this thing and then... I actually don't know what any of this means. I'm going to be honest with you. It's so dumb. Anyway, so you can do that. You can also ask us a question. We'll answer it on the air. Yeah, ask us to do one of our weird impressions. Whatever you'd like. There's no bottom. We'll do whatever you want. I don't know. Maybe we can we can do some like Mario impressions today if people ask, because I was to me. Because I meant to bring this up. I was playing over the weekend. Inga and I have been playing through Super Mario World just for a long time, you know, just in the background every now and again. And we got toward the end and I brought up, you know, like when Mario jumps and he hits things with his head, he's not hitting him with his head, he's hitting him with his fist. Yes. And I'm like, well, that's much better because if he was hitting them with his head, he would have CTE probably. And then I just came up with this whole scenario where Mario, Luigi's like, Mario, your hands are shaking all the time. What's going on? And then they take him to the doctor. Mario, the brain scans are not so good. They say you have the brain of a sixty seven year old. You've got to stop hitting things with your head. OK, let's see. I believe this. And then Bowser becomes the president and he tries to take Medicaid away so Mario can't get the help he needs. mario president bowser sent willie waluigi to defund the medicaid you can't get to your brain if they don't put wario and waluigi in the next mario brothers movie oh yeah they don't they don't show up in that first one yeah let's riot let's just take them down completely um Yeah. Dumb NFT. I forgot. We had a dumb NFT briefly. Oh, he didn't. No one said that in chat. That was a real thing. Wait, what did they say? Um, I still have my dumb NFT, Rushmore Yankee. Hold on to that. It'll be valuable. I don't have any Bitcoin, but I do have a lot of points in the McDonald's app. And I think that that's been more valuable to me in the long run. Okay, I think I remember now. Right, we're at this place and there's like zombies and I gotta do something. Okay. My pillow? Oh no, Mike Lindell's over there. He's a zombie. No, that's just what he normally looks like. Where? Oh yeah, that is a truck over there. Oh, I see. Okay. I kind of forgot how to control this game. I like the art in this a lot. Is this like the cell shading? You know, when we were watching Silver Surfer the other day, it kind of reminded me of this. Oh, yeah. Like the thick lines around everything. It's very cool. This is kind of just what Tampa looks like normally. He says, Bowser is still a better choice than our current reality. Probably. All right. I think I have to go back to this pillow, maybe. Danny says we're getting a glimpse into the What If universe where Matt writes for Robot Chicken, and I love it. We need this more, please. Thank you. Yeah, sometimes I'll just, like, get, like, on a weird scenario and, uh... Mario, have you heard of a Chris Benoit before? It's gonna happen to you if you don't get the help. Badder things happen when your brains are messed up, Mario. Give me that, my pillow. Good luck smothering them to death. That's not really what I have in mind. Oh, I'm going to take a nap. Where do I have to go? Let's see. We can hide by that RV. If we're quiet and keep our heads down. Okay, let's try it. Jpoe. Twenty twenty two says there will be no colonoscopies in the zombie apocalypse. You want to know what's so weird? That Aussie colonoscopy clip is an older one I used in a pre show a long time ago and then we brought it back for tonight and I didn't even. Yeah, like I'd use that long before this ever happened to me. So we're going to need weapons. But I have a creating my own reality. Um. This is my inventory. Leah says, glad to catch SuperDumbBrothers today. The world is bleak. Yeah, it is. But the weather felt nicer out where we were. I don't know if anybody else felt like it was. That was nice. It wasn't so windy. Oh, God. Come on. How do I just? I got a pillow. I thought the pillow was going to change everything. Let's head back to that wall. Safe there. Yeah, I agree. There's pillows over there. Matt, can you look up what I'm supposed to do in this part? Sure, yeah, let me... Probably something I should have done before we got started. You're good. They really want to get into that room. Yes, you said that. Walking Dead telltale walkthrough. Oh, IGN.com, the best walkthrough website where if you can tolerate reloading every five thousand seconds, yeah, and all the ads, you'll get your answer. So what chapter are we on or what episode? Do you know? It's episode one. I don't know what chapter we're up to, but. Okay. What are you going to do with that? I don't really know. Do you have any tricks for getting into cars? Not without tools. A bunch of noise. Soldry voice. Sounds like he should be making, should be doing like very white, sweet talk downs with that voice. I think I found a pretty damn way to stuff these guys quietly. Let's see... Okay, lean to the left, pick up the pillow just on the other side of the wall, look to the right and choose to run to the truck. At the truck, you can't get in the window. Instead, kill the zombie leaning against the nearby car by peering around the truck and selecting the pillow icon while looking at the zombie. Ahhhh. Alright. There we go. Serena, seventeen, twelve, pillow fight activated. Wouldn't it be great if something that stupid just happened to us? Wait, what? Does she have a silencer? Well, they're using the pillow as a silencer, I guess. Oh, I don't think that works. Yeah, that's still pretty loud. TV and movies always play down how loud guns are. Like, I would love to watch an action movie where, like, a gunfight gets done happening and everybody's just like, what? After, like, give up, Mr. Bond! What? ! Gonna put the car in neutral. Thanks for the hint, game. Oh, that's where I just came from. Okay, sorry. Let me know when you need another... Line! Sometimes if you just get going a little bit, you know, it becomes intuitive. Open the car door next to the zombie you just killed and take the spark plug, move the gear shift, return to the truck, use the spark plug on the window to get the ice pick. Let me see the spark plug. I'm gonna stick it up my ass. Uh-oh. Nemesir Kolboth says the loudness of gunfire was a great recurring gag on Archer. I need to watch more Archer. It seems like one of those things I would really like, and I just never really got into it. It has all my favorite people in it. Maybe I'll start watching Archer. I need a new thing to get into. That could scramble a brain pretty good. Stick it up his ass. The great for us, this game is just him just like shoving that screwdriver up his asses. Come on. You don't have to kill him that way. Oh, it's just just look, we all have our thing out here in the wasteland. OK, just let me do this. All right, so now can I go over here? Well, I'm gonna go for it. No, I don't think I'm supposed to be here. His entire game is just sneaking around. Just being very, very sneaky. Okay, do you need further? Yeah. Okay, so return to the motel. Sorry, I was reading the chat. Return to the motel. Oh, wait. Move the gear shift. Return to the truck. Use the spark plug on the window to get the ice pick. Return to the motel sign where you started the area. Look over the wall and highlight the zombie and choose the ice pick option. Aye, aye, aye. All right. So I got to go back. Yeah. Gotta go back. Danny asks, dumb fam, please take time to respond to this. How do you think Matt and Chris would do in a real zombie apocalypse? I don't intend on surviving any apocalypse. I've said this a thousand times. When stuff goes wrong, I'm just standing out in front of my house and waiting on whatever it is. Dope. You are dead. It's like the Dwight Schrute It Is Your Birthday sign. I don't think I'd be very resourceful in a zombie apocalypse. I don't even want to try. I've always said if I heard an atomic bomb was headed towards us, I would just go stand out in front of my apartment. That's horrible. I don't want to survive that, even if I did, because it's just going to be horrible. Plus, that just sounds like a nice, quick way to go out in general. Who could ask for better? It's hard to move the joystick in time. Oh, that poor man. So what are you trying to do? I just have to look over the thing and then I have to hover over the zombie and hit the ice pick button, but it's limited. But if you don't do it super quick, you're going to get got. I see. All right, we've got a couple of donations here. Okay. First one here comes from Scribbler Johnny. Thank you, Scribbler. scribbler johnny says uh you'd like to like a short rendition of when loving lovers love paul stanley and randy newman let's pull up the uh lyrics for this yeah let me do that believe it or not I'm not super familiar with this like I'm mainly an early mystery science theater yeah let's see uh so okay so it's like uh okay here we go so wait you'll be um wait you do both of these I don't do either do you want me to do do you want me to just do the whole thing yeah why don't you just do it I don't know and I don't remember how the melody goes so I'm just gonna wing this so memory memory And then it's back and loving lovers love again Who knows where it flies The lustrous love must rise Into the endless skies A new day shining bright Your heart is wings to fly And no one else can fly I really can't say why I really do like pie. I know a couple of guys. They really do like pie. They're loving lovers, lovers, love, golden, shimmering, lustrous, lovely, loving, loving, love, love, love. That's Randy. That was amazing. Good night. Well done. It's revealing how little MST street cred I actually do have every time I get one of these kinds of things. You nailed it. Scribbler Johnny, thank you so much. We have another one here from Jackie B. Jackie, thank you. Jackie says, so excited for some video games. I had a bike accident on Saturday and busted my knee. Oh, no. Sorry. If you could choose your favorite impression for a Get Well song, it'll make my week or get me through till Thursday. Jackie. I'm so sorry. Busted you, me. You know what I was thinking? Because it was in the pre-show. You're Jordan Peterson you haven't done in a while. You know, Jordan Peterson and just being moved by the power of music. Young man, Sonny Jim, I'll tell you if you just start making your bed, it'll make all the difference, Sonny boy. What? Uh... Yeah, let me think. What's a good song for feeling better? Get well, get well soon. We want you to get well. I could do a little bit of Mr. Blue Sky by ELO. I don't know. Oh, that'd be good. I don't know if I can actually really sing in that Jordan Peterson voice very well, but like... I don't know. I haven't done Tiny Tim yet, so this is Tiny Tim singing Mr. Blue Sky for Jackie to get well. The sun is shining in the sky. There ain't a cloud in sight. It's stopped raining. Everybody's in a haze. And don't you know, it's a beautiful new day. Mr. Blue Sky, please tell us why you had to hide away for so long. Where did we go wrong? Get feeling well, Miss Jackie B. You had to hide away for so long. tell me where it went wrong uh I kind of lost it there toward the end I was trying to find a way to work your name jackie but uh but we do hope you get feeling well me and chris and uh tiny tiny t yes tiny t tim get well soon that's the song I always listen to when I need to get feeling better it's uh like an antidepressant you can't be sad and listen to you can't be sad and listen to mr blue sky or the song uh have you ever heard strokin before by clarence carter yes I love strokin You can't be sad and listen to that song. That's true. I be stroking. That's what I be doing. He had a bunch of songs that are absolutely hilarious. I've heard only two of them. I've heard, well, stroking is the best one, but then there's like, what's it like? Backdoor Santa. Isn't that one of them? Sounds about right. There's also one, it's all just about how every living creature on the planet makes love. Cows make love. Okay, I know what you're talking about, yeah. yeah most of his songs are just him kind of talking like I love the part and strogan's like he's like tell me when's the last time that you made love did you make love yesterday did you make love last week did you make love last year or maybe you'll be making love tonight Stroking Clarence Carter, but don't stroke so fast. We can get that guy by the wall over there. Yeah, I bet. How do I go there? Warcliffe Killers. Stroking to the east, stroking to the west, stroking to the two dudes that I love best. Hell yeah. Rushmore Yankee. Clarence Carter. Ooh, shit. Yeah, that's... Clarence Carter, Clarence Carter, Clarence Carter. The thing about this game is, like, I just can't... The controls just aren't intuitive at all, so I'm like... Yeah, well, they're not really games. They're, like, a weird, like, visual novel, kind of. You have to, like, think of them as, like, not a game. It's like I keep debating buying the Telltale Batman series because my sister said it was all right, but then, like, I watch you play this, and this just kind of seems like it sucks, so I don't know if it's... I know. I wish it was more just, like, choose your own adventure where I didn't have to actually control anything. It's just, like... No matter what, you get a good story instead of getting eaten by zombies. Because you didn't, you know, whatever. Those Choose Your Own Adventure books were great. I have a Hardy Boys one somewhere at my parents' house that rocks. Yeah, I love those books. I don't know why they made them the way they did, though, because it was always like, you know, you'd read one part and be like, turn to page two hundred for this thing that you turn there and then like you get to the end and then it'd be like, turn to page sixty. You're just like, who put this thing together? Yeah. Uh... Dude's got some great genes. JustJackieB asked, have you played the Choose Your Own Adventure game? Oh, I didn't know there was a thing. I am definitely interested in that now, though. Did you watch the Black Mirror Choose Your Own Adventure episode? I wanted to, but it only worked on a handful of things, like nothing we had in our house at the time. Oh, really? I didn't know that that was, like, limited. Yeah, it was. It definitely looked cool, though. But, yeah, there used to be, like, a bunch of interactive kind of stuff on Netflix, and I think they took all of it off because just nobody cared enough. Exciting gameplay. Rat. Rad. It's going to be me out in the wasteland one day. Bandersnatch. Yes, thank you, Mr. Znatural. I thought it was pretty awesome. It was like... It gets kind of meta. Like, it recognizes Netflix at one point. Oh, weird. Hello in there. We're here to help. Please! It's like, it becomes aware that it's being watched by you on Netflix, but it takes place in the eighties. So he has no idea what Netflix is. Oh, weird. Oh, that sounds awesome. Yeah. It's pretty cool. It's probably not even on there anymore, but. The Black Mirror is a real hit or miss. The good ones are really good, but then the bad ones all feel like, what if the guy who worked for Vice wrote the Twilight Zone? I mean, like, the first three seasons I thought were, like, flawless, but then I watched a couple that were just like, come on. Really? Come on, Charlie. You do better than that. Though it's still got a better track record than the new Twilight Zone. That's true. Kill her. I'm trying to think of who she reminds me of. She looked like Joan Cusack, maybe? Courtney Cox. Oh my god, speaking of Courtney Cox, I have been re-watching the Scream movies in the background while I work, and I was watching Scream three not too long ago. She has the worst hair ever in that movie, and I don't know who gave it to her. In Scream three, yeah. In Scream three, yeah. It's like she pissed off the stylist. Isn't that like a meme? She pissed off the stylist, yeah. They show her bangs. Yeah, and they gave her these weird tiny bangs. What do you mean, borrow? Give it to me. I can just, you know, end this, and then there's no problem. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Please, I don't want to be one of them. They're satanic. Uh... You made a difficult choice. I wish those would pop up in my life when I do big things. What does that mean? I changed, like, the trajectory of the story? Uh, probably, yeah. Or maybe that you, like, earned points or something. Like, a big story beat, I think. Ooh la la. It is still early in the zombie apocalypse, right? She did the right thing. Your head wouldn't look like that still if you did that. No. Let's get out of here. I hate when they, in movies and TV, when someone vomits, but you never hear the actual splatter of it. It's like... he recovered from that really fast he was just kind of like and then he just stood back up again like if that were me I would have been like gasping for air for the next like minute and a half all just big things drool came out you know yeah you'd be like I do I do not enjoy throwing up oh that throwing up is the worst Though I think the only thing worse than throwing up is feeling like you need to throw up and not being able to. That is the worst feeling. The build up, yeah. That's Dusty Slay. It is. We're having a good time in the apocalypse. Derek's opening for him on some dates. I know town hall. I think I've got a, I've got to get in and see one of those. Yeah. I saw dusty like a bajillion years ago because he started doing comedy in Charleston and I started doing comedy in Greenville and he like popped in and did like a set or two in the, some of the venues in our area. All right. What am I supposed to do now? Hey there. Hi. I'm not your dad! I don't love you! to feed you to the zombies it would be so goddamn terrifying to be a kid in the zombie apocalypse right just surrounded by fucking adults and most of them are insane um okay can you look up what I have to do once I get back to the bar okay uh yes let me pop on um Okay, once back at the pharmacy, talk to Doug to go outside. Note Lee's brother with the keys to the far right, the brick on the ground, and the combination lock on the door. Look at each one. Sure. Sure. Jaypo, is it just me that thinks this is not a very good game? It could just be watching me play it is not a very good game. But you're not really in this for the gameplay. It's more about the story. And there's some people who really like games with a real heavy story and some people who don't like them at all. I like a real basic story, but nothing that, you know... It makes me have to follow a narrative at the same time while I'm playing shit. It's kind of the problem with Skyward Sword is that there's too much narrative and by the time you beat a boss and figure out all the stuff to get through the dungeon, you get through and then the next beat happens and you don't even remember what happened before. You're like, what? We should think about searching that guy across the street. Maybe he has them, but who knows if he actually worked here. Oh, yeah, and I want to take a second to talk about, too, since we kind of just decided on this at the last minute, Witching Hour Marathon happening tomorrow at seven. Oh, yeah. Kind of a last-minute thing we decided on, but, yeah, that's going to be super fun. Yeah, I'm going to be... I hear Brother Ichabod is hosting. Oh, yes, yes, Brother... Thank you, thank you. Yeah, Brother Ichabod's going to be hosting live tomorrow night, so he'll be popping in in between episodes to do, like, little Q&As with everybody and to... you know yell and scream and generally do his thing and uh and we're going to be playing our final versions of episodes three and four which will then be going on to the odds and end collection finally so that's yes what all of this is is celebrating thank you so much everybody for your patience uh with us getting those done there's a lot of life has happened in the last month and a half uh so it's uh we do appreciate it but those will be up after that so They're literally the same as the ones we played back in December, or whenever we played the last ones, just there's like two little tweaks that I wanted to make. I did, but it was too risky. Then a bunch of guys showed up and they tried. and what happened I think they're most of who you see wandering around out there penguins nine one ninety two says when does that start I think we're gonna start at seven the the aim is to go from like seven to eleven ish yeah uh each episode's about an hour it's about an hour a little bit less one or two of them you're gonna do some or ichabod's gonna do some first down fuck this up uh yeah uh between Yeah, he's going to do some stuff. Yeah, we thought it would be fun for people to ask him questions about what hell's like, you know. So be thinking of some fun things to ask him. And I'm sure Shamian will pop up and make an appearance at some point. Yeah, it's going to be a fun night. Man, that's a hasty fortification job over there. Dan Wally asks, do Matt's roommates' neighbors know Ichabod is hosting? I'll let them know. I think it'll be fine. It's, uh, you know, it's, uh, well, one, it's Brother Ichabod who's hosting and he's in hell, but even if I was the one that was hosting, uh, he's only gonna do a little bit of stuff in between each one, so it's mainly gonna be quiet and then, you know. Alright, how am I supposed to get over to this dude? Should I? Yeah, check it out. After I talk to Doug. Got to get the keys. I open the gate. Okay, so first... So, Notely's brother with the keys. Try to use the remote on the televisions to the far left. After this, hand it to Doug and he will use the remote to turn on the TVs. Those TVs are on. And I'm sure they're making a lot of noise behind that glass. Sorry, what was I supposed to do again? Something about the remote with the guy, like you have to try to turn the TVs off or then give it to him and he'll turn them off. Let me read it again. Oh, I have the remote, right? But how do I... yeah so it says first knock off the lock with the fire axe and then push open the door and grab the brick throw the brick through the window of the tv store oh there's a brick see again it's like that's not intuitive it's like you have to search you got to turn the tvs off too like you got to burst I I mean you can give it a shot like this but yeah try to yeah see what happens Bart Fargo's brother Ichabod on those TVs. That'd be great. The only thing that airs in the zombie apocalypse is the brother Ichabod ad that we did. Yeah, that'll be fun. It's been a hot minute since we did something like that. Did you find them yet give me a second having a moment here. Um, can I get some privacy, please? I have to finish it off. Did you have to kill the brain? Yes. Hit the head. Hit the head. This looks exactly as difficult as trying to kill someone with an axe actually would be. Like it's... Ugh. one more time I don't understand how like getting bit by the zombie turns you but like you can just be covered with like all of their blood and that seems to be fine science doesn't really make any sense like wear some gloves holy crap run oh god okay wait if he hadn't yelled that they wouldn't have known dumb dumb all right get back get back get back That one zombie's shirt was in the same condition as the clothes in my closet right now. Oh, we've got a new donation here. Oh, very nice. from uh rushmore yankee oh thanks more yankee thank you rushmore yankee says can matt do tiny tim doing stroking uh yes I can I I definitely know all the words to this but I just want to make sure I'm doing them in the right order so uh All right. Wow. It was the first result. Awesome. So, uh, okay. So this is, this is for you, uh, Rushmore Yankee, right? Yes. Okay. Yeah. This is for you Rushmore Yankee. So, uh, When I start making love, I don't just make love! I be stroking! That's what I be doing! I be stroking! I stroking to the east! And I stroking to the west! And I stroking to the woman that I love the best! I be stroking! Let me ask you something. What time of the day do you like to make love? Have you ever made love just before breakfast? Have you ever made love while you watched the late, late show? Well, let me ask you this. Have you ever made love on a couch? One more time. I be stroking. That's what I be doing. Thank you. That is a wonderful idea. I have now blown out my voice. Do your roommates ever question what you're doing when you're doing these impressions? No, because the one knows what I'm doing and the other one's afraid of me. And or is in our kitchen for nine and a half hours every day so just doesn't notice anything I'm doing. The guy with the hat, he gives me real like a, hey, Peter, man, turn on the news. It's the breast exam. I tell you what I'd do in a zombie apocalypse. Two chicks at the same time. That shot of him after Peter laughs at him, he's like, yeah. Shot of, what's his name, Dietrich Bader. It's like one of the funniest cuts, like, in movie history. It's just perfect. It's sublime. Alright, what am I supposed to be doing here? I just love, like, yeah, like, his advice when he's, like, going to jail. He's just, like, very genuinely just like, hey, Peter, man, watch your cornhole. It's just, like, it's so, like, caring and I'm doing the drywall down at McDonald's. Oh, no. You're not the father. Whoa. Shit. Okay. Well, look harder. Look, we don't want to put you on the spot, Clementine, but if you don't find us now, we're all gonna die, so hurry up! We are going to die. I was just thinking that too, yeah. That's such a great... That whole scene is so good. That is my favorite Indiana Jones movie. It's so good. You call him Dr. Jones, doll. I always love when they're about to jump out of the raft in the plane. You just hear, like, because they're all, like, squeezed together. You just hear short rounds. You're like, lady, I can't breathe. Yeah. Oh, I gotta save Doug or Carly. Save Carly. Get laid. Oh, no. They both died. Whoopsie. Oh, you get to try again. Because if at first you don't succeed... What time is it? We should probably start... It is eight fifty-three. Let me skip this. You've made a lot of good progress. I guess so. Joan Cusack, not you. Again? Really? I gotta sit through this whole thing again? Really? Seriously? Forklift Killer Chris brings creative solutions to the trolley problem. If you kill all the people, then you don't have a trolley problem. There, I solved the puzzle. Mr. Z Natural, I'm still disappointed that Dial of Destiny didn't at least have a cameo by Adult Short Round. Yeah, they really dropped the ball on that. The guy's, like, everywhere again. What an opportunity to put Short Round back in the Indiana Jones movies. Everyone loves that guy. Yeah, and he was sort of getting big at around that time again, too. Yeah, but, like, no one would have been against, like, that's the kind of nostalgic casting that they should do. Well, I mean, on one hand, you gotta respect that they tried to not just completely lean into, you know, nostalgia bait for most of it. It's just like, that's Indiana Jones. He has a new cast of characters, you know, and... I don't know. I was pretty lukewarm toward it until it got to the end, and then I thought it was gonna end awesome, and then it didn't, and it really bummed me out. Because, uh... Well, I mean, it's been out for a while, but I'm gonna try not to spoil too much. Time travel is involved at one point toward the end, and I thought that Indiana Jones was just gonna stay in the past and die in the past to, like, save his friends. That's true. It would have been the best way for him to go out. You know, he finally gets to, you know, and then maybe at the end, like they find like his hat in a cave, but it's like all aged, you know, and you know, time travel just I guess all the Indiana Jones movies kind of, you know, there's a little bit of a fantasy element to them. Yeah. They don't lean too heavy into it, though. Exactly. It's all, like, kind of cool and subtle. I don't know. They did time travel in an Indiana Jones movie as good as you could do it, I think. But then they just completely caved because I was like, yeah, just like, you know, Indiana Jones, this is his life, you know, and they could have made the plot about, like, how his marriage didn't work because, like, this is his real passion, and he could have... Yeah. He could have just, like, you know, not died in the past, but just, like, had to, like, remain behind or something while, you know, the rest of his friends got back, and you just know that he lived to, like, a ripe old age, like, hanging out with, like, Socrates or whoever, you know, and... but instead they ended it with more nostalgia bait. All right, so wait, I'm saving the girl, right? All right, but how do I choose which one to save? This is so frustrating. Is it not letting you click? I don't know. Whatever one it lets you click on, I guess, is the one you choose. This is like a Russian election. It seems like there's a choice, but there's not really. Peter Man. No, get her. Bart Fargo says, what's with that cloudy vision? Is that zombie vision? I think you just have glaucoma. Yeah. The main character has macular degeneration. Go, kid. You're gonna get us both killed. What? What? I know Walter Matthau punched you in the face. Why? How'd I get out? Hey, Peterman, I just put an axe in his head. Come with me if you want to live. Come with me, Peterman, if you want to live. Are you Sarah Connor, Peterman? Hasta la vista, Peter, man. Okay. Actually, that seems like a good place to pause it. We're going to play more next week. Yeah. Groovy. Okay. Is it going to save my progress here? It probably saved it after that, right? I guess so. If it didn't, I'll figure it out before. Wait. While you're doing that, I'm going to go grab my Switch real fast. I'm just going to let this play just to make sure it saves and I don't have to do all that over again. Matt's been playing Mortal Kombat XI. Yes, he has. Did you check the glove box? They should just start whatever succeeds Blu-ray. They should just have physical media be on these little chips like Switch games are. I agree. That would be amazing. Yeah, like totally uncompressed movies you can just take with you anywhere. Pop in and they don't have to really load or anything. Alright. There has to have been a save by this point, so I'm going to exit. Yes, I'm sure. God damn it. Yeah, bitch. Let me out. All right, everyone. Fire up your switches. Open up Mario Kart. Fire up your Nantando swatches and get ready for... Mario, maybe you should be in the race. You've got the CTE. Hold on. I just realized something. I've got to plug my monitor in. Let me get the game going first. yeah we just we just have you on screen usually when we do these right I think that's all you really um yeah yeah we don't need I mean unless you want to I mean it doesn't matter it's a I just know that anytime my setup can be as uncomplicated as possible it usually runs hang on one second I'm gonna I'll be right back Dan Wally has a one terabyte SD chip in your phone. That is crazy. I was talking about this with my dad the other day, how like when a thumb drives first came out, how, how wild it was, you know, that it was like, you know, for like a hundred something dollars, you could get like a, like a five hundred megabyte, you know, thumb drive. And now you can buy just like multiple terabytes for approximately that same price. I bought a sixty gig SD card for like something like, you know, fifteen dollars. It's crazy. um okay I gotta take this off the screen real quick so I can set this up um and I'm gonna put the code in the pri in the chat everyone let me just get matt the code Yeah. Dan Wally asks, how do we hook our Switch up to the stream? We use just a video capture card that you just hook up through USB to your computer. The problem is, though, is that StreamYard, we kind of have to trick StreamYard to get it to work. And occasionally, StreamYard realizes that and tries to change all the settings to one or the other. So what I do now is I plug the Switch into my laptop. So it's on a separate computer than my desktop. And that kind of solves everything with the sound issues. I put the code in there, Matt, when you're ready. Yeah, I'm getting in. Just give me two seconds. No, hurry. There you are. Oh, someone else already joined. Oh, I think because if I'm friends with them already. Yeah, I don't think I didn't even need the code. I think if you're just playing and if you're friends with you already. But if you're not already friends with you, then that's fine. Okay, just put the code in chat, everyone. By the way, anybody with Switches, feel free to just add me on Switch because it makes these types of things run better. Plus, I like to see what you're playing, and you can get up at three in the morning and see that I'm in the middle of playing Batman Arkham Knight for the nine hundredth time. I started playing and they updated the Game Boy collection on Switch. And let me put this on a banner. Scroll. Very spiffy in my little scarf. All right. Between, like, your avatar and then the other beard glasses one, I'm going to get confused. There's two. I know. There's too many glasses, beards guys here. It's like a Matt Walsh impersonator contest. I'm just kidding. All right. Are we doing all blue cells here? Yeah, let's do it. Do all blue shells. If you want to throw in something else weird, maybe you could... Oh, it would only let you do... Oh, you can do custom items. Wait. Does the next screen fix? I think so, right? Maybe. It must. If it gets weird, we can always just back out. It's got to be. Let's see. Will it not just let you click A when you go to custom? Okay. all right blue shells and if you want to throw like maybe one other thing and maybe like bananas oh because that could get what about that and the bullets so it's just gonna be a constant that or no star you think what was the one you suggested I was gonna say bananas because then it's just gonna be a nightmare to drive the whole time yeah but it'll be fun like to be able to go really fast for like two seconds until you get blown up um you know what you know what I'm I'm a little curious about the bullet one maybe maybe maybe do the bullet or we could do the star though half the joy of all blue shells that it is all blue shells and that's just like you know a thousand of them do one just pure all blue it cannot be compromised it has to only be blue this has to be unadulterated and pure I'm glad we had this discussion Okay. That's a good one. Yoshi Valley is kind of my go-to. I like sometimes just driving all the rainbow roads they have on here in, like, chronological order, so I'm gonna go with Super Nintendo Rainbow Road first. For a second, I thought you were doing your Todd McFarlane. I like doing the... I like the Switch Rainbow Road because it's bigger than the Super Nintendo Road. It's also in higher resolution. It's way better. I was watching a video again today where they were talking about the Spawn cartoon and how they had these live openings from Todd McFarlane and all of them where he's like, you know, behind his little drawing desk but it's in like this big spooky warehouse and he's wearing like a leather jacket with his hair slicked back and he has his back to the camera and then he turns around and he's like... is like, if you were about to die and the devil came up to you and said, like, would you give your soul to me to not die? What would you do? Well, a guy named Spawn had to answer that question one time. I'm Todd McFarlane. It's so stupid. Yeah, vaguely remember that. Okay, here we go, everyone. If you found out a guy was stealing your newspaper every day and then you caught him red-handed, would you beat the shit out of him or would you call the proper authorities? Well, a guy named Spawn had to make that decision one time. I'm Todd McFarlane. Oh, God. This is slightly more playable than it was last time. Ah... Yeah, I've managed to go a little longer. Okay, now it's starting to... Billy just blue shelled herself, I saw. I saw it. I saw it. You can't blue shell yourself, everyone. Just remember. I blew myself too early, Michael. You blew yourself. It's kind of fun having to avoid the... I think that's almost a strategy, so you have to kind of hang back a little bit. yeah like the the sweet spot is to be in like like third place like yeah you're close enough to the front to really kind of supersede whoever gets bombed but you personally don't really most of the time ah see that one got me I was in the crossfire crossfire What was Crossfire? As much nostalgia everyone has for that commercial, did anyone actually play it? Yes, it sucks. It's literally just a game where you shoot these little metal balls around a little table. But that commercial made it seem so badass, and then you just actually got it, and you're like, oh. Because, yeah, that song is so great. Crossfire, you'll get caught up in the... Crossfire! Crossfire! Oh. Oh. There was a couple things like that where they tried to make stuff seem cool. Like, I don't know, I remember as a kid when Jumanji came out, and they came out with the board game Jumanji, and I was like, oh, this is going to be sick. It's going to be like the one in the movie. Not that it would actually, like, you know, take you somewhere, but that board game just looked so cool, you know? Like, it was the wood and everything. And then you bought the board game, and it was just like a shitty Parker Brothers board game. You're like, oh, this is much less exciting. I know. It's kind of... I mean, it's similar with, like, the Talkboy thing, where it's like... Yeah. It's something from a movie that they were just like, oh, we could sell a toy to this, but they didn't really put much... They didn't really put much thought into anything else after. Oh, no. Now I'm in first place. I don't want to get blue-shadowed. I don't want to be a pirate. I don't want to be a pirate. Oh, God. This is fun. We're having fun. Maybe it's just the track. I feel like it's more playable this time. Last time I just felt like it was just constant exploding. The power-ups feel a little bit more spread out in this one. That could be it. Who came in first? Dot Governor. Wow. LavaBings asks, did anyone here use the Power Glove? I never did use the Power Glove. Did you ever? No, I never had it. It looked awesome. When I turned seven, I remember the big things I wanted was either a Game Boy or a Power Glove, and my parents got me a Game Boy. Thank God. now I do remember I think a friend of mine in uh elementary school like their older brother had a sega tried to release like this mat at one point that was supposed to be like the original version basically of like xbox connect where you could like move your body to do stuff and that did not work at all well do you remember like the track and field nes pad they had that that was like a they were marketing the hell out of that for a little bit where it was a big mat with buttons on it, and you could run on it. Oh, yeah. I never had one, but I remember seeing other kids with them. There was a track and field NES game that came with it. don't know we were very like the team sega for the longest time until sega folded and then you know yeah I started like I didn't play a lot of the mario games until a lot later in my life but I played all the sonics but like even like you know I didn't have the game boy I had the game gear which uh did you ever have a game gear yeah I had a game gear it was a great console but it was you know you either had to plug it into the wall or it took you like it ate up like eight double a batteries oh that's right four hours that was before they had like rechargeable batteries yeah that thing was just like a battery demolisher and uh and it was just like massive then it wasn't like super portable really and uh You could watch TV on it. Yeah. I had a TV tuner. Yeah. Let's see. I had a, yeah, I had a game boy. I guess I only had that really for like a few years before I had to gain gear. Cause you know, I remember being like fourth grade and getting the game gear. Yeah. Now, what started my Nintendo journey was that my mom... This shows you how white trash we are. We consumed so much Kool-Aid because we basically raised my cousins, too. There used to be Kool-Aid points you could get, and my mom collected so many Kool-Aid points that both me and my sister got a Game Boy Pocket that came with Pokemon Blue version. Both of us. That is amazing. It's... we got a lot of neat through kool-aid points we got a like a legit whammo slip and slide uh wow yeah it's not cool though to just uh have uh points for kids toys and a giant vat of sugar anymore though so that's uh sad times But there were more points on the sugar-free Kool-Aid, so they were trying to encourage good behavior. Were there really? There were, yeah, because my grandpa drank the sugar-free Kool-Aid, and they would just give my mom all the points, and that's... I guess it's not as bad as, like, the camel cigarette points. Oh, that was... Yeah. That was kind of the whole thing, though, is, like, you know, points. Yeah. Yeah. buy a certain amount of UPCs and then you can win a trip to China. The one I never quite understood was the box tops for education. Can somebody explain how, like, all of us saving our box tops was supposed to, like, fund education or something? It just was. It just was. Like, I remember even as a kid being like, yeah, but, like, why? Because our school would do that big, they'd have a big push during a certain part of the year, because we were always doing fundraiser crap. Where did all that money go? All those fundraisers. You gotta wonder. They had to have been maybe bullshit, I would think. Some of them probably were, right? The amount of fraud there is in this world, I'm sure we've been defrauded without even knowing it. Did you ever do any fundraisers in school, like those things where a guy would show up and he'd have a magazine for stuff to sell to your neighbors? I don't think my brother and I ever did it. And if you sold a lot of stuff, you could win a mini bike, but nobody ever won the mini bike because it would take you selling a psychotic amount of stuff, so you would... do all this work and then you would get like a like a you know a chinese finger trap yeah it was basically just child labor it was basically that yeah uh what do they call that the media mass um marketing like nexium it's like nexium for kids yeah yeah yeah so people wonder why so many people from our generation fell for like pyramid schemes and it's like that's basically what happened to all of us in school so it's still happening too look at like I don't even want to get into it I mean there are certain fundraisers where I get you know where it's like they're trying they have like the chocolate bars that they do to like raise money for like band or you know or stuff like that but it's like There's also, um, this is big in New York City, and probably not as much as it used to be, like, when I was growing up, but there's a whole network of guys who, like, hire teenagers to sell candy on the subway, with, like, the promise of, like... Yeah, what is that about? Oh, my, I read a whole, you know, expose on it, and it's fucking crazy. There's, like, yeah, there's, like, these guys. They're like, hey, you want to get the new Jordans? Just sell, you know, ten boxes of this. But they even have, like, guys who, like, drive these kids' places and then pick them up after. It's insane. And it's all, you know, it's all off the books. So they're just totally exploiting these high school students by flashing PS Vs in front of their faces. Jeez. I would a hundred percent fall for something like that if I was a child today. Yeah. This guy said he's going to buy me the new Pokemon game. All I have to do is sell nine hundred candy bars. That's like I remember when I was in middle school, my buddy Austin was like the first person I knew with like a job job. He had like a paper route and I thought it was like crazy that he had like you know like a hundred and fifty bucks every month I was like oh my god what I could do if I had a hundred and fifty dollars remember that yeah I used to quantify money like by how many Star Wars action figures I could get with it so I'm like oh twenty bucks cool I can get like five Star Wars action figures for that That's all I was concerned about. Yeah, I would do that with like, because I remember like when I was in middle school, like that was when they started releasing all the seasons of Star Trek on DVD. And I was just like, man, it would be so awesome if you could just own all of Star Trek on DVD. It's like I had a hundred bucks a month like Austin did. Like I could start buying like TNG. I could get season one. I know. It's like the things we fantasized about then. It's just everybody now. It's just everyone has access to this stuff now. But it's also just like, you know you get bored like we have access to every goddamn video game technically like basically every game that we grew up with we can just search for it and play it yeah it's kind of depressing that things are as bad as they are like in this country in the world and yet it's still the best time to be alive ever isn't that a horribly depressing thought it might have been better before the internet maybe but I mean like think about like some of the strides and like medicine that's true and just you know in terms of like civil rights and stuff right you know going backwards now but um but you're right like there's still you know there have been plenty of progressions that have been positive for like, you know, or just like technology. Like, I mean, like I've been groaning about my taxes and everything here lately, but like, I was just, you know, like with the internet though, like, you know, even if you're using like accountants and stuff, you can just email and do everything. Like you don't have to go take a form, like the post office. Yeah. And photocopy all your receipts. Yeah. And do like all that kind of stuff. So it's, I just got hit with four blue shells. Four. no no it still goes after even if you're not in first place it's kind of not fair I was doing really good right up until like the last second um just looking at the chat what did I say something offensive danny says chris dot dot dot poor chris What? What happened? Was it because I said, you know, things are the best right now ever, and I said, ah, it might have been better in the nineties. You know, when you couldn't, you know, be gay without getting fired and all that stuff. There's certain things that, of course. They made Don't Ask, Don't Tell, where the military was just like, we'll let you in, but, like, just, like, don't be, like, all, like, you know, like, ugh about it, you know? Like, what a weird policy. You know what? I'm going to do Legend of Zelda one this time. Hello blue sold the brand candy to not the generic charity stuff. Ooh. So like you'd sell just, you just like go to Costco and buy like a box of M and M's and then see, I think that's cool. If kids are doing out of independently, I think it's really creepy when it's like an adult is paying kids to do child labor basically. Yeah. That sounds like, did you ever see that episode of Batman the Animated Series where there was, like, a guy living under the streets of Gotham and he just had, like, a group of, like, children who were, like, his slaves who he would, like, send out to steal people's purses and then come back to the sewers? Yeah. Okay. Danny confirmed, yes, the dot, dot, dot was for me. But then I mentioned civil rights and right after you had entered, or right after they had entered. You know, it's like, yeah. I don't ever want to say, oh, no, we should go back to the nineties. I mean, like, every decade has, you know, every period in history really has, like, things that are good about it and things that are bad about it, you know? And it's like... That's, you know, it's like why I said, like, yeah, it's the best time to be alive ever and yet everything is still horrible. Like, I don't think utopia is achievable. If we're gonna get real philosophical on the stream here, I don't think, you know, a Star Trek future is ever obtainable because every system has inherent flaws and, uh... And there's always more work to be done. Hi, I'm Matt Riser from the Super Dumb Brothers. We've had a lot of fun tonight, but I want to talk to you all about a serious topic for a moment. God, I just got the shit beat out of me. I had like seven of these things hit me. I know. I had like six, literally six hit me at one time. No. Oh, this is the F-Zero track. I didn't even realize that until like right now. Yeah, why doesn't it have like the theme you would want to hear? Yeah, where's the little things on the edges where you go like... Oh, it's these things. Oh, look, I did the... There's some great sax music going on. For real. Saxophone players, like, getting turned on by this race. Oh, my God. Yeah. Damn, that was close. Somehow I still. Oh, okay. I'm in third place. Okay. I'm in fourth overall. That was a great indoor race. Yeah, that was awesome. We were literally neck and neck. Well done, .govna. What time is it? Should we do another round? Yeah, we could do one more round. Let's do another round. I know that was a great ending that will probably just wind up ruining by whatever we do next, but hang on, my switch is being weird. Should we change up the... Oh, communication errors. Should we just do like a plain round of Mario, which is normal? Yeah, just do like a regular race. Hang on, I got to get into your... Hang on, I got booted out of the lobby. I need to get back in. Hang on. Before you make any rash decisions. There you are. You good? Yep, I'm here. I made it back, Luigi. Oh, Luigi, the doctor says that I don't have a very long. My brains are all scrambled from all the blocks I've been hitting with my head. Wahoo! Let's see if we're all caught up on shoutouts. And thank you so much, everyone, for hanging out. Yeah, thanks for hanging out. This has been a lot of fun tonight. everyone I hope comes back for the Witching Hour Marathon right here on Twitch tomorrow. Yeah. Gotta make sure I got enough makeup. I should. You mean Ichabod. Yes, yes, that's what I mean. It's not even makeup, it's just his face. Oh, I meant like the human makeup. I do like the Joker from Batman, where I put human paint over top of the... Oh, this level. I don't really play this one that much. They were really running out of ideas when they made this level. This is one of the bonus ones, right? Yeah, it's like F-Zero level, Zelda level, different Mario levels, Donkey Kong level, giant bathroom. Kids play pens. Paris? I don't know. Yeah. I like the Animal Crossing logo. That one is fun. It's the first time you've ever seen a toilet in a Mario game. I'm going to go out on a limb and make that assessment. You'd think, considering they're plumbers, you'd see a lot more of that kind of stuff. Yeah, it's only ever pipes. There's never like, Luigi, we need to go fix it. This guy's shitter. He's a plumber. There's a toilet. Okay, is there any recorded instance of Mario and Luigi fixing a toilet? Morbo, are you watching? Maybe like the Luigi's Mansion games, maybe? I don't know. Oh yeah, you're right. Seems like a toilet maybe shows up in one of those. Yeah, you have to like, there's ghosts inside them sometimes. Yeah, there's ghosts in the bathroom. It's nice to know the Mario cartoons canonically shit, you know? Ew. Toilet spraying toilet water up. Ooh, I made it up to the high tracks. Alright. Well... Quondale Dangle. Ahhhh! I can get better at drifting. That's my flaw with every racing game is I'm a horrible drifter. It was my nephew's birthday a couple weeks ago, and he had his birthday party at Dave & Buster's, and they had, like, a four-panel Mario Kart set up there. Oh, nice. It was cool. Happy birthday, Dylan. Yeah. He's seven. Um... That place kind of sucks, though, if I'm being honest. Yeah, you went to Dave & Buster's, not even, like, Chuck E. Cheese, because, like, I always think of, like, Dave & Buster's as being, like, you know, Chuck E. Cheese, but it's full of, like, alcoholic adults instead of children, you know? Yeah, but it's the same basic, you know, terrible service. There's just kids running around everywhere. You can never get anyone's attention. It's just a nightmare. But Chuck E. Cheese is way worse. Way worse. They don't even have the animatronic band anymore. That's, like, half the fun. Chuck E. Cheese makes me, like, angry that they're ripping families off with their business model. Like, that's... That's their bread and butter. It's like ripping off families who just want to have a fun time with their kids. And like their pizza is awful. It's just terrible. And they don't. Yeah, it's like it's like the second worst pizza I've ever had in my life. The first worst planet Hollywood in Myrtle Beach, believe it or not. But the games at Chuck E. Cheese, they make most of the games that they have out there. There's one or two licensed arcade machines there, but the rest is just the cheapest games that end in two seconds. It's such a rip-off. Well, like, all the fun games don't win you any tickets, too, which is, like, always the... Like, all the fun games are just games you play, but then all the games that give you tickets to try to get stuff are all, like, shit from, like, the Great Depression, you know? It's like, you either play the Jurassic Park game, or you can play this game, governor, where you put your shiny shekel in here, and there's a bunch of other shiny shekels on the edge of this platform, and maybe your shekel will push the other shekels over. Like, what the fuck is this? You can either play Mario Kart, or you can stop the spinning light on the correct circle by pushing the button. Yeah, Dylan, at Dave & Buster's, he won enough tickets to get, like, a mechanical arm that looks like, you know, like a T-One, like a Terminator arm. Oh, yeah. And he can, like, grab stuff with it. I thought that was pretty cool. But he probably spent, like, fifty dollars in games to get to that. Yeah, on something that you could buy at, like, the dollar store, probably, if you looked around. Yes. Yeah, and you know, Chuck E. Cheese does that too, and it's part of the same ripping off families model where you're essentially paying fifty dollars for stuffed animals that go for like a dollar. Yeah. Sorry, what were you going to say? Oh, I don't even remember what I was going to say now. I'm focusing on like four different things at the same time. Yeah. Oh, I just took first. Going ghost. I hate the ghost. Oh, I was about to say the claw that Dylan had, is it the same one that Chris Farley has in Tommy Boy? Yeah, exactly. It's pretty cool. I gotta say, it's fun playing with those things. And just pretending it's like a real mechanical arm. Hey, is anyone watching going to the Riff Trax taping in Nashville this summer? Sound off in the chat. I'm thinking of maybe going. If enough cool people show up, I'll show up. I want to know who's going to be there. I need to know. Oh, .govna won. They're riffing Time Cop. The Cop of Time. Is that the last race? Is there more? One more. Un mas. There's probably two more, and I'm just really dumb. Two more. Moo Moo Meadows. Oh, Jackie B's going. Most people I know is kind of far. I wish they did it in Minneapolis again because that seemed a little easier for everyone to get to. More of a central location. I've never been to Nashville though. Have you ever been there? Uh, I think I've been there once. I mean, not as an adult, but when I was a kid, we used to have family that lived out that way, so I've driven through that area. I'd love to go back. I debated for a while back when I was in between apartments and stuff was looking, you know, real rough in New York. I was like, you know what, I could maybe relocate to Nashville. rainbow road it's just the ae nes nes rainbow road rainbow road yeah oh that's a close one I was so happy when they did rainbow road in the in the movie I may have stood up and cheered no I didn't I wanted to you cried like kevin smith does in his reaction videos to things that man is always crying now he only cries over batman like I bet you like like if his own daughter like died he wouldn't cry as hard as he does when he watches like the dark knight returns adaptation for the fiftieth time kevin smith's a fine dude I don't mean to talk trash about him And he's had a rough couple years, from what I gather, but there was a period where he was putting out reaction videos where he was just, like, crying about, like, everything. Yeah. And that, you know what? That's fine. Hey, I cry about a lot of things, too, so, you know, it's... I think Kevin Smith's just kind of an easy target, because he's made some bad movies, but I don't think he's a bad guy, like, at all. I actually think he's probably a really good decent dude. We actually know a couple people who've worked with him before. Oh, yeah. Like, I'm sure he, like, you know, treats his staff well and all that stuff. Like, he does seem like a genuinely good dude. I just question his, like, his writing and... He's one of the few people who was better off before he was smoking weed, which I think he's not smoking weed again now, and he's one of the few where I'm like, good. Because those Evening with Kevin Smith DVDs are so great. Oh, those were great, yeah. And there's such a change between him and those and him in the last couple years. That story he tells about meeting John Peters and everything with the Superman movie that happened is so great. Oh, God, yeah. The story where he meets Prince is awesome. The giant spider. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, baby Luigi's upset. Wah. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. I made it in fifth. Mario, your CTE is a getting worse. You can't even drive on the cart. Oh, we do have another race. Here we go. Okay. I made it through the super Nintendo one. So now I'm going to pick the N-sixty-four rainbow road and see what happens. Dot governor says good game. Thank you, dot governor. You too. Dan Wally, I backed the Kickstarter and we'll go to the movie theater. Oh, nice. Have the tickets gone on sale yet? No, I don't think so. Forklift Killer says we should all make crying reaction videos to movie Joe Nights. That's funny. Do-do-do-do-do-do. Final race, yes. Ah, I missed the boost. I've been missing the boost a lot today. My Mario Kart skills are slippin'. Oh, yeah! Like the other day, I took my countries of the world quiz that I routinely do over a hundred and fifty on when I'm doing it, and I only made it to like a hundred and forty something. I'm slipping on all my things. I missed Lesotho, Chris. Lesotho! Ah, I went through the pink snow. Ah! Shy guys snowboarding. Why? Why? Why would the shy guys snowboard? Yeah, they don't seem like their bodies are built very well for boarding. But it's like they're not even like associated with like snow levels or anything. I don't know, it's just weird. Yeah. I do like this level a lot though, going off the little sides. It is cool. Ugh. I hate that pink snow. Snow sucks here. Why is the snow pink? Because there's, like, yellow snow. Is the pink snow from, like... The shy guy's pee pink. The shy guy's blood from where they faceplant and break their necks and die. Mario, I think several shy guys died on this course. It's because of your interfere with your cart because your brains are messed up and you won't begin to help. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Ah, third. Fourth. Well, it was fun. Ah, fifth. Ah, shit. Ah, shit. Shit. Shit. okay that's enough that's enough matt matt stop stop kill you okay thanks for hanging out everybody this has been a lot of fun uh thanks everyone you guys are the best We will be going back to our dumb television programming here in a bit. I'm doing some episodes based off of machinery. So I've got Pray for the Wildcats, Lost Missile, and Killdozer coming up. And the choppers. Yes, Big Rig says you've become the ghost from Ju-on. That's the grudge, right? Yeah. Pre-game. Pre-movie, I mean. My entire personality is becoming like, what would happen on Space Ghost Coast to Coast? And I'm just trying to channel that energy now. Thanks, everyone, for hanging out tonight. Yeah, thanks for hanging out. You guys are the best. Join the Super Dumb Bros Super Club. Get on the Dumb Industries newsletter. And join us tomorrow for a witching hour at seven. Yeah, come hang out for the witching hour. If you haven't seen the latest episodes, they'll be presented by Brother Ichabod right here on Twitch. Bring your hell questions. yeah we're gonna we're gonna have a fun night I'm he uh brother ichabod is is very looking forward to being in his full get up for a straight like six hours it's gonna be a great time that is uh I'm gonna raid uh tv at ten so if you guys want to watch that okay yeah over there and then matt's over here yeah we're gonna be playing ready pray for the wildcats if you want to watch william shatner and mike brady and andy griffith have adventures in mexico on bikes Yes. That's what's happening there. Excellent movie. All right. We'll see you guys tomorrow. Bye. Bye. Seacrest out.

Matt & Chris put their differences aside for the sake of humanity to present an all-new episode of Super Dumb Bros as they continue their quest through Skyward Sword and then welcome special guest Peter Hunter to discuss RiffTrax’s new Kickstarter to riff TIMECOP! Plus, a round of RiffTrax: The Game with viewers! Yes!

Transcript:
I was born in Saginaw, Michigan. Time Life Music proudly presents the Great Story Songs Collection. From the Battle of New Orleans to a battle of two fiddle players. Thirty hits, including the all-time trucker's classics. It was the dark of the moon on the sixth of June in a Kenworth pulling logs. Get great story songs on two CDs or two cassettes. Johnny Horton, Bobby Bear, Marty Robbins, Johnny Cash. From a boy named Sue to a man named john he stood six foot six and weighed two forty five kind of broad at the shoulder and narrowed the hip and everybody knew you didn't give no lift a big jump how old was I when I first seen old rivers I can't remember this special collection is not in stores fighting soldiers from the sky so please call now fearless men who jump and die to order great story songs call one eight hundred three zero five ninety five eighty three or send twenty four ninety nine for two cds or two cassettes plus four ninety nine shipping and handling two great story songs department five richmond virginia two three two eight zero call one eight hundred three zero five ninety five eighty three or order online at timelife.com all right so later in the show we're going to be meeting someone very interesting but first here's a big fat balloon like creature the kids think he's great but I have never heard of him So, Kirby, you've become a big star because of this. The fabulous multi-level platform game based on your life, Kirby's Dream Land from Nintendo. But now there's a brand new game, Kirby's Pinball Land on Game Boy. So, Kirby, is it true that if you don't like someone, you swallow them, spit them out and destroy them? Spot of lunch, Mr. Kirby? You vast pink glob, you're... The Kirby series, introducing inflatable Nintendo. I am black. I am beige. I am red. And I am white. But hold up. We are all different. But our souls are still the same. No matter what color we are or what we look like. Now, but what's our main message out there to them people? But our souls are still the same. Say what? But our souls are still the same. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey. Just think. Oh, I've picked something up, John. Let's look at it, Ralph. Hey, that's the catatonic kick of real oranges accosting the back of his throat. Ah, Tony! What is that? No idea, Ralph, but it's definitely not wee woolly winky. Morning. Blast my tango taste buds, Tony! Yes, Ralph, I'd be upset too if a man came up to me with his kilt flying. Spanking. You know where you've been tangoed. It's come to my notice that some people are paying as much as fifteen point nine percent APR on personal loans. They can't be doing their sums properly. Who charges between eleven point nine and fifteen point nine percent APR? The big four banks. Exactly. Aw, and who charges as little as nine point nine percent APR? Halifax! Extraordinary! And as I shall prove with this simple demonstration, this compared with this equals extra value! Which begs the question... Who gives you extra? Who? Who? We do! Who gives you extra? Go for a mouthful! Go for cakes for everyone. Just one snack is what it takes. And it's go for, go for, go for cakes. Open wide, stuff your face. There's always room for more go for cakes. Empty the box, let me in loud. Eat those go for cakes till you explode. Exercise lately. Till you explode. kill kill kill I'm off. Oh, I've got that video Rebecca wanted. And it cost a fiver from that bloke down the market. Great. It's not even out yet. She'll love it. I know. See you later. See you. Take care. Bye now. You're okay, honey. Look at this. Hey, come on. What? Cool things happen when you start the day with Kellogg's Pop-Tarts. So cool. They're hot, so hot. The hot taste of real fruit filling inside. And cool frosting on the outside. the cool hot part of this complete breakfast so cool they're hot so hot thank you Wet Pets and Pablo. Only one place where fish and lizards hang out with cats and chinchillas. Kick back with hamsters and dogs, parakeets, rabbits, and scorpions. One stop, one shop, we got it all. Any pet you can get and take home. Best pet products and best pet food. Best pet service is Wet Pets for you. W-E-T-P-E-T-S. W-E-T-P-E-T-S. Wet Pets and Pablo. I am sick and tired of these insurance companies telling you what good neighbors they are and how you're in such good hands. If your car is totaled and you owe more than it's worth, they give you the lesser amount and you continue to pay a finance company the difference. You're an innocent victim, you're paying on a car you don't have, and you probably can't afford another car. Don't urinate on my leg and tell me it's raining. Insurance companies, we're going to court. Barry Glazer, legal advocate for the injured, disabled, and urinated upon. Pay me, pay me, pay me. Pay me, pay me now. But I can't afford it. I don't care. I've got to feed my family. I'll call Denville Crow. I'll call Denville Crow. Don't you dare. Make him settle for a payment you can afford as low as ninety nine dollars a month. That's the power of the new bankruptcy law. Hello? Jim, it's Susie. Our house is on fire. Can you come over? Of course. I'm on my way. Hello, this is Cal. Cal, this is Mike Case. Hi, what's up, Mike? My boy just wrecked the car. Is your son hurt? Not yet. Hello? Kurt, this is Leonard. I got a business opportunity I'd like to discuss with you. Why don't you meet me in the office in about a half hour? You've got friends in the insurance business. Mr. Surfer, have you ever considered propane as an alternative energy source for that board of yours? With a little retooling, I could get it to work. Tell you what I'm going to do. Being that you're my neighbor and I like you, I'm going to give you the new neighbor discount and a free t-shirt. So what do you say? Take a ride on the Cosmic Tide on an all-new Silver Surfer next Thursday. as Fox Kids Heads for the Hills continues. Just think, with repeat business like that, I could eventually be supplying propane galaxy-wide. One, two, three, four, five. Starting right now, see Lubega live on the Kids WB Snow Jam. With brand new shows all morning, including three new Pokemon. A little bit of Batman dropping in. A little bit of M.I.B. shedding skin. A little bit of Serena's what I like. A little bit of Pikachu on the mic. It's all new and all Lubega. Starting right now on the Kids WB Snow Jam. Thanks for calling King of Wing. How may I help you? Yes, can I speak to the king, please? Yes, ma'am. Ho, please. May I help you? Yes, I would like to have one of those big old burgers I seen advertised on TV. Oh, you want the big double meat? That's a big burger, baby. Think you can handle all that? King of Wing burger's so good, they make me want to shake it. Shake it, baby. Shake that booty down with me. Shake that booty down with me. Do the dingo shake. There's no need to feel down I said young man Pick yourself off the ground I said young man Cause you're in a new town There's no need to be unhappy Young man There's a place you can go I said young man When you're short on your dough You can stay there And I'm sure you will find many ways To have a good time It's fun to stay at the YMCA. They have everything for your men to enjoy. You can hang out with all the boys. It's fun to stay at the YMCA. You can get yourself clean. You can have a good meal. You can do whatever you feel. Young man, are you listening to me? I said, young man, what do you want to be? I said, young man, you can make million dreams, but you've got It's fun. You can get yourself free. You can have a good meal. You can do whatever you feel. Young man, I was watching his shoes. I said, come on. Down and out with the blues. I felt nothing. Can I run? The world was so trapped, that's me Someone came to me and said, look at me Take a walk up the street, it's out there Call the YMCA, they can't stop you Back on your way YMCA, it's fun to stay at home Young man, young man, pick yourself up around YMCA It's fun to stay out the Y YMCA Young man, young man, does it all by himself Young man, young man, put your pride on the shelf YMCA What's that? Do you have insurance on this car? No. It must be Eagle Man. I've got something for you. Oh, look at those low rates. Obviously, these are things that bug a lot of the young people. But this time, rather than hear from the establishment who run newspapers, radio, television, book and magazine publishing companies, political parties, and schools, let's hear from those other teenagers who aren't smoking pot. Not all teenagers are on draft. I'm not, and my close friends aren't. Every time someone wants to turn me on to pot, they tell me I'll discover myself. Well, I don't need that kind of crutch. Besides, I've never seen any potheads come up with any kinds of answers that help them cope with the kind of problems they have, or I have. Oh, that horse is so stoned. Wilbur will be another joint that's got rheumatoid arthritis. Is this a western now? Coming soon to Weird and Wonderful Wednesday Watchalongs. over the merry antics and experiences of Hoppity, the sentimental grasshopper, his sweetheart honeybee, and all their friends. We've got fun, we've got freedom, we've got joy. We've got fun, we've got freedom, we've got joy. Now if there be any Tom, Dick or Harry Who knows the reason why these two should not marry Let him now speak There is suspense, action, and excitement aplenty, as you'll discover when you see the fun-packed fantastic adventures of these tiny lovable creatures. It's a package of sheer joy for the entire family. See Hoppity Goes to Town, the delightful tune-filled cartoon adventure in glorious Technicolor. all right yeah we're gonna watch a pig hollering video it's a four minute long video of a pig hollering contest oh it's peter griffin oh he's a police siren biggie come on piggy what so who votes are there judges Thank you. The pigs. Like a panel of pigs. Like a panel of pigs. When you guys choose the paintings, they always seem to fit. We're coming into some difficult times, I think, and I'd like to thank The guy in office right now just pissed off a whole lot of people. To me, I don't know, it just kind of feels a little bit empowering in a time when I don't feel like I have much control over much of anything at the moment. So I have control over this. I can do this. You know, that's... that's funny you said that because when I was painting her the first time I was thinking the same thing she looked kind of queenly majestic you know This is coming from our clubhouse chat from Mrs. Torgo. Mary Jo, where would you take Roddy on your first date? straight to my sofa for a makeout session. Oh, Gal, I don't know. He's rather continental, so I would probably take him out if it were in Minneapolis for martinis or go the complete opposite way and take him on a hike to Minnehaha Falls or something like that. He'd love that, I'm sure. Where would you take him, Chris? Where would I take Roddy McDowell on our first date? I don't know. Maybe a movie. Maybe we'll go just take a stroll in the village. Go to some antique shops. Oh, nice. I think a theater date would work well. Yeah, go see it. We'll go see the new Glenn Gary, Glenn Ross. Yeah, I'd love to see that. Nobody expects the Ironside Inquisition. yeah watching him walk around and do nothing is so much more interesting than seeing the killings by the monster will he walk into another room or stay in this room oh my god the suspense is killing me Oh, damn, marriage agrees with me. Oh, now I can't do the Harpo Groucho theater scene. Well, that was a productive afternoon. This is like a real estate video. My dinner with Andre didn't have this many indoor scenes. Hello, hello, hello. What's up, Matt? Oh, I can't hear you. Oh no. Oh no. Can everyone hear me? That's the important part. Oh, where did he go? where did matt go now there he is um I still can't hear you uh peter can hear me backstage okay so how about now there you go there we go my microphone was off uh the dreaded off button yeah I I turned it off earlier I'm getting this like weird feedback coming from my oh you know what it probably is Yeah, you sound doubled up. Do you have sound coming? It's coming out of the speaker on my computer and also my headphones at the same time. I don't know why it's doing this. It's never done this before. Very strange. Very, very strange. Let me try to do it. Check your output on your Mac. Hang on. Oh, my God. Thank you for being patient, everybody. Hang on. Oh, you know what's maybe going on? Let's try this and this. Okay, that might be better. Hello? Hello, can you hear me? I'm still hearing feedback. Yeah, what the fuck is that? We've never experienced feedback before. I've never had this happen. It was happening to me when I was running out to get snacks earlier. I didn't even know it was possible to have feedback on Scream York. Why is this happening? All right, why don't I do the intro solo? Yeah, hang on. I don't understand what's happening. Is that any better? I think so. No. What the fuck is that? Let me take you off just to make sure it's actually you. Check, check. Hello. Hello. Hello. Yeah, it's definitely a mad issue. Anyway, let me take that off. Well, welcome everyone. Welcome to an all new Super Dumb Bros. With me, Chris Gersbeck and Matt Reiser, who will be out hopefully in just a minute. What happens if I add this one? Now I hear your switch, I think. We'll check in with Matt in a minute. Matt? Yes? Oh, hey, did that do it? I'm still hearing the feedback. What? It's kind of funny just cutting him off like that. Maybe that should just be the show. Jay Poe saying the Switch was too close to the mic. I don't know if that was it. Um... Let's see what else is no feedback with just Chris. Yes, we figured that out. I'm good. Thank you everyone for validating me. Because it really helps my self esteem. Let me get this. The very least let me get the bed music on here. So I don't feel like so dead airy. There we go. Guys, did I mention we have a very special guest tonight? Peter Hunter from Riff Trax is going to be out here in just a minute to chat about the all-new Kickstarter they just announced today. I'm so excited about it. uh because they're gonna be riffing time cop a movie that I have loved since the day it came out uh my dad took me and my brother to go see that and uh I still vividly remember I saw it fresh meadows theater here in queens and uh we thought it was great I mean I I never was a huge van damme fan but that movie I was like all right Van Damme. So that is going to be this summer. They're taping it in Nashville this year. I'm going to put the link in the chat. Of course, we're going to chat with Peter more in just a little minute. In just a minute, I'm going to... There you go. There's the link. Okay, I fixed it. Oh, what was it? It was something with my monitoring software. I turned it off and I turned it back on again and it... Boom. Boom. I don't know what it was. Thank you for putting up with that. You all mismaged in my room by myself, just going like, what the fuck is happening? For several minutes. Well, I guess that was basically just all it. I just reenacted it for you. Yeah, I mean, that's usually the case with these things, behind the scenes. We're all screaming at our computers at all times. Pretty much, yeah. Not a very chill vibe. Hey, everybody, welcome. Sorry. Sorry about that. We're all about the chill at Dumb Industries, even if we have technical difficulties. I have no chill. Look at this. Major Joe backed the Kickstarter as soon as he saw it. For a second, I thought it said I blocked the Kickstarter as soon as I saw it, which would be really a weird thing to do, to go out of your way to block a Kickstarter campaign. I guess you could. You probably could. Someone knows how to write a code, but... Um, yeah, I think a lot of people backed it. I checked it this afternoon and, uh, I think they're almost at their goal, but yeah. So anyway, let's just get some announcements out of the way up top. Uh, we're streaming to Twitch tonight. Hello everyone on Twitch. And we appreciate all your support on Twitch. We've got some new subscribers. Let's see. Biggle, ninety eight. Seventy six. Doc, fifty nine. Thirty four. And Gundam Ronin. Thank you guys for subbing. And if you would like to watch this program completely ad-free, you can head to dumb-industries.com slash superdumbbros and sign up for the free Super Club, and you'll be able to access this same stream just without all those annoying Twitch ads. It's completely free to join. And also, if you'd like to help support the show with a donation throughout tonight's show, you can head to dumb-industries.com slash donate. And a donation of any dollar amount will get you a shout-out in the form of one of our patented terrible impressions. Yeah, we've got quite the collection of them now. I was trying to think there was a song I was... Oh, you know what I had stuck in my head earlier that I thought would be good for impressions? You know that song, the Scatman? Remember the Scatman? Maybe I'll do the Scatman as some voices tonight for some folks. That is great. Do that kind of thing. But you can also put whatever you want us to do in the prop for those. Yeah, and if you have a question for us too, you can put that in there. Whatever you want us to do, we will do. We have no bottom. So really, whatever you want us to do, we will do. There's no low that we won't go to. Although we have no bottoms kind of true in two ways for me because, yeah, I have no shame. But I also don't have an ass, really. So it's kind of... This is true. This is true. It's kind of... I've said it many times before. My body is built like... You know how Barbie dolls, how they have that ass section that the legs go into? If you just took that little mid part off and then just put the legs directly into the torso, that's basically how my body's built. So it's... Oh, yeah. Just my legs kind of end and my torso begins... There are many hard chairs I can't sit on very comfortably. A hard chair, that's quite the punishment for me. I feel like, Matt, you would choose a hard chair over a nice, comfy recliner. I think that kind of sums up your personality overall. Well, it's what? That I would choose something that intentionally makes me unhappy and miserable versus something that would just... be a relaxing nice time yeah I kind of unless I'm sort of like agitated or pissed off I'm really not you know living uh oh I know it's uh because yeah like you know I had all that you know not to retread the past but I had a bunch of medical stuff you know a couple weeks ago and I was in my head just like once I get past this then I'll be relaxed and then I'll be happy and now I just spent like two weeks just like hugely depressed because they're just like there's just this void where all the anxiety was. And instead of filling it with joy, I've just, you know, like laid around in my own filth for a week and a half. So it's a Jesus. I didn't know it was that bad, Matt. We spoke earlier. You seem fine. well you know define I guess that's all relative um well anyway this is fun tonight we're gonna be playing legend of zelda skyward sword or I should say matt is going to be playing that plan I uh I struggled a little last week it was a little bit of I'd never played zelda and been like chatting and doing everything at the same time and my brain kind of exploded but I've gotten past where I was stuck at yesterday and I think from here it'll be a good jump off oh nice so uh Send your Zelda questions in. We'll be chatting Zelda tonight. And have we already set up that we have a guest tonight? Yes, we do. This is very exciting. Rift Tracks today just announced their Kickstarter for Time Cop. And we're very lucky to be joined tonight by Rift Tracks' marketing director. Let's welcome to the Super Dumb Bros program, Peter Hunter. hello I'm excited to add my own audio issues to the program yes they contribute in any way possible we're excited to have them and you met uh peter thank you so much for being here yeah welcome thanks for having me yeah I know I'm excited it's a great day happy time cop day to all who celebrate that was so exciting I uh guys were revealing it over multiple days and I think most people figured out you're doing time cop yesterday but it was very exciting to get confirmation today I will tell you yeah that's awesome yeah we've been very excited it's right in the wheelhouse of like a competently made but incredibly goofy movie that will just make for perfect ripping It's truly perfect. I was trying to figure out what it was going to be based on the few clues you guys gave because I think it was just like a nineties sci-fi cult classic, which could be like, there were like fifty movies that fit the bill just off the top of my head. uh but time cop is like a lot of people were thinking maybe hackers which I've actually never seen but I think it's like ripe for riffing oh absolutely and uh but yeah time cop is it's like a perfect perfect selection I can't wait to see what they do in this it's it's van damme it's uh ron silver and mia sarah so I don't remember anyone else those are like the biggest names yeah movie though now is this like is this like van damme in his like is is wet mullet period or is this like right after that is this well this is this is peak mullet yeah okay interesting you should ask because there's like two different van dammes you see in the movie like from different times one of them has a mullet yes that's how you tell them apart They're also involved in a fight scene together, and it's just very awkwardly shot to make the separate shots of Van Damme work together. It's so goofy. It's very goofy. I haven't ever seen this one before, but is there one stunt person with a bad mullet wig on, and you can clearly tell it's the wig, like Samurai Cop? know I don't even know if they're ever in the same shot they might be in one or two shots together but it's mostly just not right yeah because you're seeing them like at different time periods they don't I don't think they get that clever but um yeah ron silver is a great bad guy in it too uh Going to be very excited. And Ferris Bueller's girlfriend. Oh, that's right. Yeah. But what the guys did with Point Break last year was just, you know, like they had Gary Busey in that movie to basically just have like an excuse to do Gary Busey jokes for like two hours. And this movie, I think Ron Silver jokes are going to be the highlight of it. and of course van damme oh yeah I mean ron silver like the whole villainous plot is he's going to use time travel to basically commit campaign finance violations yeah nice like can you find a more boring stupid plot for time travels you literally could do anything and you decide to just amass campaign finance violations it's ridiculous I mean, it's subtle, I guess. That's kind of, if time travel was real, that's the kind of mundane shit that people would use it for, I feel like. No, for real. It's just like, I'm going to go back in time and get this tax break, and I'm going to go and do this. Has anyone ever made the joke Ron John Silvers before? Like the restaurant Long John Silvers? But if not, we should trademark that. Tell that to Kevin later, Peter. Tell him to use that. I'll do it in our nightly call. Okay, perfect. uh razor's edge yeah I was looking at this earlier time cop made a hundred and twenty nine nine million dollars into box office it only costs like twenty something million to make so that's what a van damme movie would do in the nineties I don't think that's possible today There really aren't that many stars that can just move a movie by themselves. There's only like a couple and they're not even like full, like Sydney Sweeney and like Margot Robbie are kind of ones, but they're even, they can't hit a hundred percent of the time. Yeah. That was a real eighties thing is you just have like these buff action people or, you know, Van Damme's not really buff, but you'd have these people and you could just write an entire shitty movie around them. And that would get it made. Cause people try to act like the rock is kind of similar now or like a John Cena, but they're very kind of, they're in a lot of bad movies one and two. It's like, there's nothing that you can really sell like just off their name. You know, it's like, Well, The Rock, I think, like Dwayne Johnson. But there aren't any movies. It's not like, remember like that peak Steven Seagal period where you could just like put his name on like, like Steven Seagal is like, and it was always Steven Seagal is. And then like the title, like Steven Seagal is under siege. Steven Seagal is, you know, hard to kill. And you don't have like The Rock, you know, The Rock is, you know, like. That's true. That's true. yeah it's a lot you just have to have a vehicle for him to do slow taekwondo at people to do to do the splits and to yeah how many times does he do the splits in time cop that has to happen at least once oh two it's only two times um yeah one of them is like an iconic photo where he is only in his tiny ways and he's on top of a countertop yeah and it's the most convoluted stupid setup like it would have been so much easier to make him do the splits for a variety of reasons but yeah no I remember also like so my dad I mean I vividly remember seeing in a theater but then like two years later I remember being at my aunt's house and she was watching like my great aunt and that scene happened and she was like she was visibly excited over the split and tidy white oh john clinton bringing families together I know I know um yeah and then there's the other split where he's got like his sneaker in the guy's face you know them all or something that was his thing he was all about doing splits and uh the Muscles from Brussels, right? Was that his name? Yeah, the Muscles from Brussels. When I worked for, well, I worked for, when I interned for Lloyd Kaufman, he told me a story about how he was on the MGM jet one time with Jean-Claude Van Damme and his family. And he said that like Jean-Claude Van Damme's family was like so normal seeming compared to him and that he was just like this like drunken weirdo, like the whole flight. And just the visual of Lloyd Kaufman and like a belligerent Jean-Claude Van Damme on a plane together with a normal family. Just, I love that. I will say his American accent is better in Time Cop than it is in Street Fighter, which is a bit of a street fighter. So that Kickstarter is now live. Everyone can head to rifftracks.com slash Kickstarter. That'll bring you right over there. You guys are almost at your goal already. Your goal is three hundred fifty thousand. You're at two hundred eighty four thousand. Yeah, it's in every year. We're honestly just astonished at how generous everyone is it's really impossible to do this just the complete upfront cost of it it's expensive to put movies in theaters um it's just insurmountable so you know big thank you to everyone who has donated or is going to donate or has donated in the past yeah because we couldn't do I mean we love doing riffrax live and we couldn't do it without you yes um and now have you announced any of the the kickstarter goals yet or or the um the stretch goals not yet yeah okay not yet um we generally do a few days after um hitting the goal so maybe later this week maybe yeah week Very cool. Well, keep your eyes peeled on Rift Tracks' social media then for all that. Yeah. That is very exciting. Peter, we're going to be playing some Skyward Sword. Are you good to hang out with us tonight? I would love to. I have many stories about this game. Oh, awesome. The original version. I'm assuming you're playing the one for Switch. Yeah, this is the Switch one with the button controls. You don't have a Wii Motion Plus around? No. That was what kept me from buying it originally is because you needed the upgraded Wii Remote to do it. They were impossible to find. um and then when we're done with that we're gonna play some riff tracks the game with the viewers so everyone hang out we have turned off christmas mode finally so oh yeah we accidentally kept christmas clips on and honestly christmas mode is fun yeah wrong with christmas mode yeah no it still works um okay let's let's uh let's get matt's uh screen up here oh yeah go ahead and get all this Alright, let me switch over to my correct stream yard window. Ron John Silver. I googled Ron Silver while you were talking to make sure I was talking about the right person. Oh yeah, there it is. There we go. Okay, so where we left off in Skyward Sword, as you recall, is I was trying to find a bunch of these little testicle-looking guys, and I could not... So I did that behind the scenes before the stream today. So now I'm just going to talk to the Wolford Brimley testicle and tell him that I found all of his little friends. Oh, man. What a design choice for a series known for its unique character design. Yeah. Could we make this giant nutsack look like a president from the eighteen hundreds or like he was at the OK Corral? Oh, yeah. Okay, so I'm gonna get a tip on where Zelda is now. That young girl, Zelda, was that her name? Yes, it's all coming back to me. She said she had to travel to the temple deep within the woods. I tried to warn her how dangerous it was there, but the clever little thing vaulted off my belly and ran off on her own just the same. She, so like princess Zelda, like, uh, she like molested this thing kind of at, uh, you didn't ask for that. Well, for Bramley testicles, it is very taft desk. Yeah. I was trying to think of a good president. It's like, like Chester, a Arthur, you know, like one of those. The ball sack is giving Lone Ranger vibes, Fresh Mary Yankee says. So little inside Riff Tracks president joke baseball here. One of my friends is distantly related to Rutherford B. Hayes. Wow. Whenever we make obscure jokes, I try and... wrangle him and I did this for years where I randomly just bring up Rutherford B. Hayes and now the guys on occasion just sneak in Rutherford B. Hayes jokes so I feel like I subliminally got Rutherford B. Hayes into the pantheon as a way to dunk on my friend That rocks. I was reading something not too long ago that like I think I think he may have finally passed away, but there was like a grandson of President John Tyler who was alive until like the twenty tens. I want to say because John Tyler had kids at like like seventy something years old and then like his kids had kids at like seventy something years old. And then by the time that dude was in his seventies, it was like the twenty tens basically. So that's insane. Cute, cute. So, Peter, you played this for... Was it for Wii or Wii U? It was for the Wii. Like, late era Wii. Yeah, it was... It's got to be close to the end of the Wii life cycle, yeah. And I remember getting it and not having a Wii Motion Plus and going to every GameStop in the area trying to find one. And then just having extended conversations with everyone at GameStop about how difficult it was to find one. Yeah. I eventually was able to borrow a friends but it took so so long and then ultimately the motion controls were kind of terrible yeah it's the minute I could turn the motion controls off for this one I did even though the button controls compensating for it are a little awkward it takes a second to adjust to it I I got a wii I got one of the wii's that came with like the motion plus built in Hmm. But I yeah, I remember that it was like a little thing you plugged into the bottom of the controller. Yeah. And then later they made them with it. Just it just came with. But yeah. OK, so now I got to hike over to the woods. But this remaster was for Wii U originally, right? And then they ported it to Switch. Well, this was... I guess? I don't know. Well, it's like... I don't know. The original Wii U Zelda game was Breath of the Wild, weirdly. Oh, yeah. That was like a... That's how I played that game. Even though it's more known for being Switch. But yeah, I think this may have been like right at the turnover from first Wii to Wii U. Nice. Peter, you also have a new podcast. I do. You do with your wife. It's a Twilight Zone podcast. Oh, nice. Called The Monsters Are Due. A new episode dropping tomorrow. Oh, amazing. I listened to the first episode. It's great. You guys do a really great job of recapping Twilight Zone and presenting some interesting facts that I honestly never heard before. And I love the Twilight Zone. So yeah, I want you to check that out. I just put that link in the chat. The monsters are new podcast.com. yeah it came about because we decided you know twelve years in it was the time for us to get to that point in our relationship where we should start a podcast together you know very comfortable uh but we have talked about doing one for a while and my we both like the twilight zone my wife is a super fan and knows much more than I do which will become evident she made that clear in the first episode very quickly into um You said something like there were six seasons, and she immediately was like, there weren't six seasons of this show. It's great. Yeah, so... So we actually just got to an episode I wasn't familiar with, but my wife was. It's the episode coming out tomorrow. It's for an episode called Walking Distance, which is this very sentimental, incredible little story that was honestly a joy to watch. And that's the fun thing about the Twilight Zone is you can have these really introspective, tightly crafted, wonderful stories. And then you can also have a goofy story about a goblin on a wing. Yeah. The full breadth of storytelling there. But yeah, we're having a lot of fun with it. We've got great feedback so far. New episodes every Tuesday until we run out of the Twilight Zone. Incredible. So you're doing every episode from the very beginning. So the plan right now is to do every episode in order. And then at the end of each season, we're going to do a draft where we draft the lineup of episodes from that season. That will get very competitive very quickly. Oh, I love that. We'll see if I'm still married after that. yeah we're really excited about it those early episodes are really interesting too because it's like rod serling like had the concept down from the very start you know it's just uh refined it over the years and everything but though I found through the years through watching it there's there's more bad ones than I remember there being there's all the classic ones of course but you get to that like that one season where they're like shooting a bunch of them on video and like oh those were weird ones oh is that the season where it's forty minutes like there's a season where it's long maybe they did it yeah there was like one season where I think every episode was it was like it took up a full hour um but then there were yeah there were some they shot in video which was it doesn't really aged well because like when those those ones that are like the classic ones that are shot on film and they're like remastered they look so great like uh yeah I mean, these first few episodes, Bernard Herrmann did the score for two of them. Wow. Nice. And it's kind of crazy just how interconnected with what we would call classic Hollywood, but what was contemporary Hollywood at the time. I made a point of saying that the Twilight Zone is generally, especially for the era, incredible at casting child actors. I don't know if you know this, but for the Brady Bunch, aside from the eldest children, they didn't audition. They just played with toys in front of the producers, and then they were like, you? So their casting is kind of phenomenal, but there's this one child actor in this episode, Walking Distance, who I think is terrible and is clearly reading cue cards off screen. He's also poor, so it makes sense. But it turns out that actor was Ron Howard. oh my god yeah a lot of famous people passed through that show yeah it's I mean it's a shatner twice uh burgess meredith a bunch of times um I think four or five times for bridges and directors too like richard donner did the shatner get gremlin episode I think uh yeah um ray bradbury uh yeah ray bradbury wrote at least one Yeah. And who's the guy who did Planet of the Apes? Oh, I'm not going to remember that. I think my friend is in chat who will know this right away. Oh, Richard Matheson. Richard Matheson. Yeah, he did a bunch of Twilight Zones, too. Rod Serling did a pass on the Planet of the Apes script originally. I know. Our good friend Dana Gooley did a whole comic off of that. I don't think much of it made it into the final script. No, like all the apes, they were dressed like contemporarily in his version, so they wore like suits and they drove cars and they... He would. It's like, how could we know that this was possibly Earth? So when you're done with the series, are you going to do the movie or like the eighties revival gallery? Yeah. We haven't really discussed what the plan is right now. We're just trying to enjoy the show as we're going through it. And what's, what's fun for me is I've seen a lot of it, but you know, it's like a hundred and twenty some odd episodes. I haven't seen all of them. And a lot of them I've only seen like one time. But we just watched The Lonely, which is this story about this man who was on an astronaut for a life sentence and he's given like an android as a partner, a female android. And it's actually quite poignant and nice, but I'd seen it once like a few years ago and I forgot a lot of it. So it's nice to be able to revisit it. Yeah. yeah no there's I mean as much as I love the same boat as much as I love the twilight zone there's when we watch like the marathon there's always like an episode here and there I'm like I don't think I've ever seen this one I remember like in new york city growing up they'd always do a twilight zone marathon on new year's eve yeah sci-fi typically did that right they started doing it eventually they kind of took over that but um But they would kind of always show the same episodes during the marathon. It was kind of like the greatest hits. It kind of makes sense because Serling is from Binghampton, which is outside of Syracuse. Oh, yeah. In fact, that... There's a park. Oh God, it's called Recreation Park. That's it. Which a few parks in the Twilight Zone are based on and has like a plaque for Serling. It's featured in, not featured, but referenced in the episode we just did, Walking Distance. Oh, nice. He references a lot of New York towns too in episodes. You know that doppelganger episode that takes place at a bus station? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's like in Cortland, New York. Oh, okay. So anyone from Cortland was like very much aware of that episode. I know that place. Where is Cortland? It's pretty... New York State is like pretty far west. Oh, okay. So it's a hot state, New York? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, because I'm from Massachusetts originally, but being from Massachusetts, New York is my sworn enemy, so I don't know. Right. Where did you, where in Massachusetts? So my family is from Gardner, which is Northwest of Framingham. That's like the closest like gnome city. It was a major furniture manufacturing town. But mostly I just say I'm, if someone asks and I don't want to elaborate, I'm just like, I'm Boston, Cambridge. People will know. But yeah, Northwest Mass. Yeah. That's always the best when you talk to some people and you're like, Oh, so where are you from? And they give you like the specific rundown. You're like, I'm not from where you're from. You could just say outside of Boston. Yeah. It's like, you know, when I tell people where I'm from in South Carolina and it's like, I'm like, Oh, kind of like outside of Greenville. And occasionally they're like, Oh, I like I'm from South Carolina. I'm like, Oh, I can go into detail now. It's a, I live in Spartanburg, the murder capital of the state. Uh, Wait, what am I doing with this guy? Mr. Xenatron says Time of the Apes is actually slightly closer to the original Planet of the Apes novel in some ways than the actual Planet of the Apes movies. Oh, well, there you go. time of the apes was my first uh mystery science theater movie oh wow mine was oh god oh soul taker it was soul taker oh nice I was gonna ask what's the one where the guy takes people's souls Whoever named that movie was on the ball, just like, what's this about? Guy takes soul? Soul taker. I'm going on break. Yeah, see, I mean, it's either that or they're just completely lying about the content of the film. It's either dead on or just a complete lie to sell movie tickets. Yeah. like the the brain that wouldn't die which is actually a head who the head is I think it was originally called the head that wouldn't die um wait there was oh landon newt said I've never seen the newer planet of the apes movie should I bother yes I keep hearing those are good I still need to oh you've never you neither of you have seen any of them No, I watched the Tim Burton reboot. Oh, that one's ridiculous. That one is ridiculous. Where Marky Mark comes back to the present at one point and there's like an ape, Abraham Lincoln. The Andy Serkis trilogy is great. I never saw the fourth one they just put out that's like a sequel to those, but My issue with those movies, it's kind of my issue with, like, the Resident Evil movies and the Fast and the Furiouses, which is that they don't really have numbers next to them, and I get lost what order I should watch them in all the time, because it's, like, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes and War of the Planet of the Apes and then, like, Kingdom and, like, just put two behind one of them. I can... Yeah, I get that. That being said, I have seen the entire original Planet of the Apes franchise, which I don't think Chris has seen, and none of those are numbered, so maybe I'm just Yeah, I don't think I've seen all of the original ones. Oh, those are great. Aren't a bunch of them just of the planet of the blank of the planet of the apes? Yeah, pretty much, yeah. Beneath the Planet of the Apes is a great movie. It's so freaking weird. It's basically just the same plot as the first one, but there's an atomic bomb and mutants that are worked in, and it gets very weird. Oh, don't they, like, worship the atomic bomb like a god? Yeah, it's like what happened to all the mutants, and then the movie ends with Charlton Heston blowing up the planet, and then they still made four more movies after that. Incredible. You gotta print that money. What gets me about the Tim Burton one is the production design and all that is so incredible on that movie, but the movie's so terrible. Yeah, and the makeup is just not very believable. It's kind of funny. And it has maybe the most fanservice-y cameo I've ever seen in anything, because they bring back Charlton Heston as the old ape, and he says all the lines he says from the first one. They used to show that movie all the time on FX, the Tim Burton Planet of the Apes. And I just remember, because there was always like a promo. I watched The Shield a lot back then. And there was this promo for Planet of the Apes that started with the Michael Clarke Duncan's line where he's like, bow your head. So that became like a running gag with all my friends in college who would just shout, bow your head. apparently Tim Roth passed on the role of Snape in Harry Potter for Planet of the Apes that's a legendary bag fumble oh no that's almost as bad as the one guy who was going to play Wolverine in the X-Men movies turning it down so he could be the bad guy in Mission Impossible too oh no which in retrospect was the right choice Hugh Jackman wise but I bet that guy he thinks about that a lot Mission Impossible too is a great movie it's stupid but I love it The Mission Impossibles are fun, though I am kind of sick of them being like, well, Tom Cruise does his own stunts. We have to respect him. It's like, no, he's insane. He shouldn't be doing this. He's mentally unwell. He is quite old. He should not be doing this. It's true. He's kind of become like Jackie Chan in half the spectacle of the movie is knowing that he actually put himself in danger. Yeah. I think he just enjoys doing that kind of shit. And just by putting it on camera, he gets to, you know, like write it off as a business expense. He's basically like Adam Sandler, but at least the shit that he does is like fun and exciting to watch. Whereas when you watch those Adam Sandler movies, you're like, you wanted to go on vacation to Hawaii this year, didn't you? And you're, and this is how you're getting away with it. Well, I heard Adam Sandler did all his own stunts for Uncut Gems. He did all the yelling. He did all his own stunts for Jack and Jill. He's great, Matt. Oh, man. Okay, so just imagine swinging a Wiimote about in your room hoping not to... I tried to play this with the motion controls when I first got it and just the the trying to fly the bird or yeah like it's uh so yeah but like trying to fly the bird with the motion controls I just knew right away I was like yeah this is gonna I really don't like I don't like using any kind of motion controls some for some stuff it's okay like for this I have them turned on to like where when I'm using like a weapon I can use it to like aim and that's fine right yeah but yeah I like it in like small mini game-esque capacities but I mean we've like basically even trade to play games with a controller and like a keyboard and mouse yeah let's just yeah what are we doing here yeah maybe I can just hit it from back here I do like that they gave it the old college try though and like now we just kind of know that there we go Yeah, I mean, I had a Wii U, and they really went out of their way to make sure there were separate things going on the tablet screen. That was a big appeal of all those games. The first few games that came out, at least, it was like... It was kind of cool. Yeah. That was just such a very confusing system to a lot of people, though, I think, because it was like, it's like, so it's on the tablet and you can play the game separately from the console, but you can't, like, really take it on its own away from the console. It was like, it was just a lot for people to deal with, I think. This is a fun puzzle. You get through this because you have to go this high. Yeah, this is cool. This high go crazy. Yeah. like there's a lot of really fun bits in this game and like there's a few zelda items and I don't think you've gotten it yet but one of my favorite zelda items is in this game and like that's all cool but it's kind of lost under the mountain of issues with the motion controls unfortunately well there's the controls and then like this is the Zelda game where they're like you know what people really want from a Zelda game like an on the rails story so let's just make this so full of exposition and it's like it's you know and like characters have arcs and stuff and I like a good story in a game but it's like but not at the expense of like the gameplay because like you go to Breath of the Wild after this and it has the most bare bones story because it's just like don't you just want to play a Zelda game without you know like go over here to make this cutscene happen, and then you've got to go to this, and then there's going to be a fifteen minute scene where it's explained what happened to you before. I'm like, I don't care. Yeah, no, those games are so good. Oh my God, I've lost so much of my life to those games. The Breath of the Wild and Tears of the Kingdom. Yeah, both of them. I have like ninety nine percent in Tears of the Kingdom I'm like fifteen core I still have not even really played Tears of the Kingdom it's the first Switch game I got it's very good but like only diving if you're willing if you have time where you can like drop three or four hours at a time yeah it's like doing heroin yeah you just like look up and you're like it's like seven a.m. that's how it was when I played Breath of the Wild it was like I was like addicted to it it's so it's they took little mechanical upgrades and like they made it faster because they had to because the game is so much bigger and the switch is still the switch um but it's it's incredible like I I know I'm really going out on a limb here saying that tears of the kingdom is really good yeah three years after it came out or whatever It's uh, I mean like it was one of those games when I bought I think it's the most I've ever paid for like a console game because it was like But I have got my money's worth out of that fucking thing it's I've Put in a lot of time on it But I do I do think that it benefits from you kind of having played through breath of the wild first. Absolutely because it builds on all of those mechanics and then it adds all the the building stuff which I I liked the building stuff okay, and, like, the little dungeons and everything, but there's, like, a whole community of people that kind of treat that game like it's, you know, like Minecraft or something. And I'm like, I don't get into all that necessarily, but... But it's, uh... But yeah, like, all the extra maps, all the sky stuff, and the underground stuff, I've unlocked all that. It's insane. Like... I mean, I will give Nintendo credit. They never discount their games, but, like, it's very much a Nintendo game. Like, you don't really... Unless it's, like, Mario Golf or one of the sports Mario games that, like, cheap cash grabs. And though I do love Mario Golf. Um... I don't know if I've ever played that is that worth playing the new one's fun if you get it on ebay for cheap and you have some friends like you basically like my buddy and I will have like a couple of beers and like just treat it like we were actually golfing you know right but like the animations are so cheap and clearly recycled from like mario party or something and then like the cast of characters is like weird like ninji is one of the characters you know the classic mario character ninji If you're wondering who Ninji is, he's a background character in Mario II. And he's in a bunch of games because he's basically a little star that's very easy to animate. Yeah. And has, like, no facial expressions. Makes sense. I always wanted them to do more with those Mario II characters, like King Wart, the bad guy from that game. They've done Birdo. Yeah, Birdo's been the one that broke out from that. I mean, and they dropped Mouser pretty quick. He was pretty big for a while. Oh, yeah, Mouser. but I think it's just because they're mostly yeah I think it's mostly because they like didn't really make it right yeah it's reskinned a doki doki panic or whatever the game's called which is just I think it's just like short for heart attack I could be mistaken Birdo is such a surprising character for Nintendo to latch onto, because it's like, hey, you know this weird, like, sex doll dinosaur that, like, shoots eggs out of its, like, cloaca mouth? Let's put that into... to nine thousand games for children. Predates Yoshi, too, which is weird. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay, I've got to get over here to this side, and I don't remember how... Peter, do you plan on getting a Switch, too, when it comes out? If I can get one without a scalper, then probably. I mean, I love my Switch. It makes me see the appeal of a Steam Deck, but I don't think I could handle having my Steam library with me everywhere. Yeah, yeah. But I love my Switch. I mean, I'll be taking a four-and-a-half-hour flight to Nashville this summer, and the Switch will be the best. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For stuff like for travel, it's great. Yeah, and it's also nice if my wife wants to play Red Dead or something, I can just sit and play Switch on the couch. Right, right. Yeah, I think the new one has the advantage. They've already said it's going to be able to play all Switch One games. Which is rare for Nintendo. They love making you pay for that stuff. I mean, I've re-bought a lot of the Wii U games I had just because I wanted to play it on Switch. Yeah, a lot of people have. The Wii U, I think... I think that's probably going to be remembered as one of the major stinkers, unfortunately. Like, I don't really think they had a plan. It probably made the, it directed them to make the Switch, which I think ultimately will make it worth it. Yeah. Yeah. Like, I think the must play on Wii U, like, there's the Wind Waker HD remake. on wii u yeah which I have yeah and then the the smash on the wii u is quite good as well then they made the one on switch which has everything that's in the wii u one I know eight million other characters from fire emblem you didn't know that's why I had to rebuy that one because I was like I have I had that one on disc even oh wow yeah we got to get chris to play some wind waker at some point that's great yeah like the mario world I re-bought and mario was great yeah I'd be happy if they ported some three DS titles to switch to, like, I'd love to play link between worlds on switch. Yeah. Or even just let the Ocarina of time remake that they did for three DS, which was so much better than the original one. Did it with the Majora's mask remake as well. Yeah. I haven't actually played all of Majora's Mask in any of their forms. That was one where I was like, I could just never quite groove with it. The weird time limit and everything. And it just feels like when you play it that this was rushed out very quickly after Ocarina of Time, which it was. I get it. It's my favorite Zelda game. I love that game. It's the intricacies and depth of that world. I love world building. I love lore. That's basically the whole game. There's a lot of problems with it, I'll openly admit. The HD remake they made for a three DS is very good. I hope they'll put that somewhere else. Oh, we got a donation here from Landon Newts. Landon, thank you, bud. It's Heather. Oh, Heather. I'm sorry. um yeah this is uh landa just says in the notes here forever dumb I want to be forever I want to be matt you should sing that as gollum oh yeah I was I was gonna do the because yeah like that because yeah when you said that I was like uh what came to my mind originally was the the rod stewart one you know it's like hey I gotta look up some I gotta look up some lyrics Oh, yeah, well, this one came up first, so yeah, I'll just do that. So, yeah, so this is Forever Young as Gollum, so... Let's dance in style, let's dance for a while Heaven can wait, we're only watching the skies Hoping for the best, but expecting the worst Are you gonna drop the bomb or not? Let us stay young and let us live forever. We don't have the power, but we never say never. Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip. The music's for the sun, man. I'm skipping. Forever young, I want to be forever dumb. Do you really want to live forever, forever and ever? Forever dumb. I want to be forever dumb do you really want to live forever London forever forever dumb thank you so much dude incredible no notes it's like the voice of a little angel green light it okay so I'm still stuck in this now things are getting serious I put my sunglasses up that's how you know I'm I do like this kind of damage notification has kind of gone the way of the past, like just blinking red constantly. It's like, hey, did you forget? Hey, you're dying. Just reminding you every five seconds. What the fuck do I do now? I've raised the water level. I literally just beat this game in its entirety last year again. I thought it would be easier for me to make some stuff happen. Sometimes when it's a convoluted Zelda puzzle, it's hard to commit it to memory. Yeah. I've beaten the Water Temple in Ocarina of Time like a dozen times, but I don't think I could do that now. That's one where I've played that game a bunch and every single time I'm like, you know what? I'm getting the guide out for this one because if you do anything in the wrong order, you are just screwed. You got to put the boots on. You got to take the boots off. You got to go to this level. You got to do the thing. You got to go to one. You got to go to three. You got to go to the middle. Oh, man. And that was why the three DS one was nice. Cause it didn't really change that puzzle, but it did color coat the level. So you could at least tell where the hell you were at. Uh, okay. What the fuck do I do here? If anybody, if anybody knows what to do at this point in Skyward Sword, uh, cause I raised the water level. It seems to have raised it everywhere. I think I need to raise it one more time, but I think there's, I think I have to get inside another. Oh, you know what I need to do? I think, is there something over here? There is something over here. I'm awesome. There it is. DevoG-twenty-seven just cheered. Forty-five bits. Thank you, DevoG-twenty-seven. Thank you. I love Devo. Okay, so now I go through this door, and that'll raise the water level up, and then I can go across the thing. We also got new follows from Desi Chainsaw Fingers. And bidets are bidope. That's quite possibly the greatest Twitch name I've ever seen. These are bidets of our lives. If I ran a bidet company, that's what all our commercials would be. A soap opera about the miracle of bidet ownership. Okay, I need more shit for my... anyone watch the oscars at all last night I didn't know I I don't know it's so arbitrary and yeah I you get all those reports from people being like I don't think ralph fines should have won because you already won and it turns out he didn't like right and all that stuff and like you hear that they don't a lot of people don't watch the animated like movies or shorts and they just let their assistants vote for them and it's like what are we doing what are we doing here it is kind of insane like that's the the system is most people just don't watch any of those screeners right so yeah yeah it's like who's really voting for any of this stuff and that's the whole money side of it with you know the further consideration campaigns right really just tipping the scales you know Well, and I think there's a lot of people, too. I mean, I always feel this way, that there's these big Oscar darling movies, and then they'll win an Oscar, and very rarely after that do you ever hear about them ever again. Remember that year when, what was it, The Artist or whatever, that silent movie was the big thing, and then no one ever talked about it ever again after that? Yeah, it's not like when The Godfather would win. It's like, yeah, of course. Or even like Parasite people were like big on that. And that's still a really good movie. It's probably of the Oscar movies that have won last couple of years. One of my favorites, but like it's, you know, that was like everywhere for a minute and then it just like vanished. I mean, I think with a movie like Parasite, at least that director has a pretty deep catalog. I mean, the Robert Pattinson movie he's making, Mickey said that he's excited for. I mean, I like all of his movies. Did he do Snowpiercer? He did do Snowpiercer. That's a great movie. It's a Snowpiercer, The Host. If you haven't seen The Host, The Host is fantastic. The monster movie, The Host. There's like two other The Hosts. Parasite. He did one for Netflix that I don't remember off the top of my head. And then Mickey's Seventeen. Danny says, hold on Matt, are you saying people stopped talking about The Green Book? Oh yeah, I remember. The Green Book was one of those kind of white savior type movies, right? That was a criticism of that. I'm pretty sure directed by one of the Farley brothers. Yeah. Oh, weird. I never realized that. It's Aragorn doing a reverse Driving Miss Daisy, right? Isn't that the plot of that one, kind of? I haven't seen it, so I don't want to speak on it. I should be allowed to do synopsis for TV Guide. That would be like Star Wars Episode II, Attack of the Clones, Obi-Wan rocks a sweet mullet, and that's my entire... I just watched Train to Busan the other day, which I'd never seen before. Yeah, it's one of those movies people have been nagging me to watch forever, and finally. Korea was on a really great zombie movie kick for a while. If you haven't seen One Cut of the Dead, which is kind of a zombie parody. Honestly, don't look up anything about it. Just watch it. One Cut of the Dead. One Cut of the Dead. I think it's on Shudder, if you have a Shudder. Oh, yeah, I do. So, yeah, I highly recommend that. Korea has been producing high-quality horror for quite some time. Train to Busan is great. That director, I believe, has another movie coming out this year. Awesome. There's an anime sequel to Train to Busan, which I haven't seen. Yeah, I was reading about that. There's a quasi-sequel. Same director. What's a quasi-sequel? It's technically the same world as Train to Busan, but it's none of the same characters. Yeah. Is the train to Busan related to the train to Desert Moon that the lead singer from Styx went on? Oh my god, that is a whole... Remember that song? Remember that, like, track seven on a Styx album? Hey, that was his, that was him solo, that was... Oh, it was... That was a Dennis DeYoung solo. I was gonna ask which Styx lead singer. Yes, that was Dennis DeYoung. I love that the story of Styx is just like, they were a classic rock band, and then he was like, you know what, we're going all in on this robot shit, and none of them were having it, and that was the beginning of the end. And it's also where they made all their money, so you should be thanking them. We should probably get into our co-op game soon. okay let me try and find a good stop in place I was hoping I could have got a little bit further in this dungeon but at least I got further than I did last week playing this so is this where I was I think this is where I was hang on I have the map do I have the key for this yet I can't get on the thing yet I don't think right peter what other games are you playing right now Um, right now I haven't jumped on anything new. I have like such a massive backlog, but I've been so busy. I've just been playing stuff I already know. So like I've been playing Stardew Valley and like the latest NBA two K, which it's very, which is funny because basically they started a new thing where you can play older seasons. So I'm like basically playing NBA two K twelve, but on NBA two K twenty five. It's like, oh, wow. Remember when Al Jefferson was on the Utah Jazz? Remember before LeBron James won the championship? Stardew Valley is one people keep recommending. I don't know if I... It seems like one I will get addicted to, so I'm staying away until I have a long flight or something. That's kind of like Animal Crossing-esque, isn't it? You like management sims? Like Animal Crossing? Yeah. Yeah, I like that. I like Animal Crossing. So it's like a management sin, but also like a relationship game, but also like a commerce game. But it's very low. It's as high stakes or low stakes as you want it to be. And you can really... play it however you want and since it first came out the developers released so much content for free like the game is so fundamentally he added a free multiplayer version like five years ago oh wow and he's I think he pushed another update like six or seven months ago like a massive one so he just he supported that game forever I bought it on sale for like five dollars years ago and I've it's my top five on steam maybe my it might be number one on steam yeah So yeah, I mean, I'd highly recommend it, but much like Tears of the Kingdom, you should carve out time. You should just be prepared to ruin your life with it when you start playing. Though you should also make one save where you learn how to play the game and you play like six months of a year and then just delete it and start over and do everything right. See, like you can't do that in Animal Crossing. It's like you have to like reset the entire island, I think. You have to commit to the bit. There's one of those that's coming out soon where it's like you're a hobbit and you have like a little hobbit house in the Shire and you manage it and everything. And that sounds... That sounds pretty cool. That sounds fun. Can I have the strawberries and cream at the dancing pony? My question is, will you be able to smoke as much weed as those hobbits smoke in that game? Because you know they're on it. Their pipe weed. The long bottom leaf. Where Tolkien dorks will get on to me and be like, it's clearly a type of tobacco or something. I'm like, no, Saruman has a line in that movie where he tells Gandalf that the halfling's leaf has slowed his mind. They are on the good stuff over there. Gandalf gives off Elder Stoner vibes for sure. It's a world where dragons are real. Let them smoke weed. Yeah, that's the most unbelievable part of this that they're they're smoking weed in this game where there's an evil ring that can take over your brains and You will suspend disbelief over a sheet of armor this thin stopping a spear by a troll. But weed. Weed's off the table. My dad and I are going to watch the Lord of the Rings trilogy again very soon. We have plans. Extended or original. Exactly. That's what we don't know. I mean, we've seen them both. So I'm thinking maybe theatrical just because they're a little... It's better. I think the extended Fellowship is worth watching, but like Two Towers and Return of the King, I think you can definitely go theatrical and be just fine. Yeah, I think that makes sense, because I think the Fellowship's only like two and a half, and the extended brings it to around three, which is about the length of all the other ones. But like, the Two Towers and Return of the King stuff, it's like, look, here's more Sean Bean. It's like, yeah. Return of the King is like four and a half hours long or something. It's not worth it. If you do watch the theatrical Return of the King, just watch the scene where Saruman gets it because they, for whatever reason, don't include that in the theatrical one. I was like, why would you leave that out? Yeah, the raising of the Shire and stuff. I don't know if I've ever seen the extended Return of the King. It's like another hour longer than the theatrical movie. It's ridiculous. We have decided we're not going to bother with the Hobbit movies, which I've still never seen. Why would you? It's inexcusable. I mean, it was a two hundred and seventy page book and made it into not. Yeah, that's nuts. And there's extended versions of all those, too. Yeah, I own a one hundred and seventy page book where they sing for about ten percent of the audience. When my wife and I first started dating, she was like, it's not that much. And then I literally went and I marked off all of the pages where they sing. And it's like twenty seven pages. That's like those books, because I remember those movies came out. Peter Jackson did a good job turning those into action movies, because I was like, thirteen, those movies came out. I'm like, oh, I should give the books a try, and the books are all just like, and then the fellowship went here, and they stayed here for a fortnight, and then Sam sang a song, and then everybody ate, and then they went to the next place, and they stayed there for a fortnight, and then Gandalf sang a song this time, and it went on for four pages, and you're just like... Would somebody, like, shoot something or stab something? Yeah, it's very much like, um, George R.R. Martin has the same thing where he's also, like, they're big fans of Arthurian lore and, like, that's how that stuff was written. So there's paragraphs and paragraphs of descriptions of, like, food. Yeah. And it's like, I don't care. I really, like, that's cool, man. I don't care. Like, uh, like, Chris, have you ever read the Lord of the Rings books? I did in college, yeah. It's been a while. Like, fucking Tom Bombadil, who shows up in Fellowship, I'm like, I applaud you, Peter Jackson, for deleting this man from here, because what does this have to do with anything? There's, like, seven pages of him singing about, like, his girlfriend's hair. It's egregious. It's very... I don't know. He was dealing with trauma from the war, okay? That's fair. I don't know. I think I maybe had a wee bit of an impasse. Should we go ahead and switch over? Yeah, let's switch over. All right. Skyward Sword, everybody. Let me get this. I made it through half a dungeon. If I were by myself, I would be Googling all of this intensely. Thank you for letting me indulge my passion. I'm gonna send you guys the uh code in the private chat here oh yeah let me get over yeah head over to riff tracks dot games we'll put the code in the chat in just a minute I always get that mixed up with jackbox.tv I'm like one of them is dot tv and the other I know I get so confused over that um it's part of our ongoing war with jackbox not just kidding we're we're actually friends with those guys they're cool they seem it I love the jackbox games yeah we we've done some charity streams together and things like we actually helped them with a game on I don't know if it was this party pack or the last party back It had something with public domain films in it. So we were able to help them with some of the legal difficulties of that. Yeah. Okay, I'm in. You're in. All right. You're in what? You're in. Nice. Save it for the game. All right, guys. I just put that code in the chat. So everyone head to Riftracks.games. Save the jokes for the game floor. It always fills up instantly, and I love it. Okay. I'm going to go ahead and take my Switch off. Oh, yeah. There we go. All right. All right. All right, everyone. And if you didn't make it into the game, you could still vote in the Twitch chat for whatever clips. Let me turn this up a little bit. I love this movie from attack of the super monsters it's half kaiju half anime oh yeah oh now that peter's here he can weigh on in on our ongoing debate over the music in this game oh my god yeah what's up what's up uh I I say that the music that's a you know when you're putting in your riffs and everything qualifies as ska chris says it does not qualify as ska I have to think about that. Let's wait for it to play. We've literally been arguing about this for like seven months. A few months, yeah. Oh, it's very interesting. Man. This song. It does make me want to pick it up a little. See? But I don't know if it's ska. There's no horns. There's no horns. Oh, no horns? There's no horns. You would only call a ska song without horns a ska song if it was by a ska band. Right, and it had the guitar upstrokes. But these aren't really upstrokes because it's on the... I don't think Jonathan Colton has ever made a ska song. All right. But it is definitely Ska-esque. What would you call something then that it's like, if it's not quite Ska, but it's like... I could see a Ska band having this song in their repertoire. Okay, so you could be a Ska band that makes this song, but the song isn't specifically Ska. Well, it's like when Madness branched out a little bit, you know. Not all Ska songs by Ska bands are Ska, but all Ska bands who... Not all pee-pee times are poo-poo times, but all poo-poo times are pee-pee times. I feel like I'm saying one of those. Yeah, square rectangle situation. I am rectangle. I just shit my pants. That's what I would do if that happened to me. Yes. Excellent. Wait, you aren't a little boy? Bye. Great. Now I'm an H&R Block rap. Is the same curse that turns Billy into Captain Marvel the same thing that turned Tom Hanks into an adult and big? I have become Dork, destroyer of worlds. There's some fan fiction someone should work on. Oh, no. The big DC crossover. Couldn't hear it. Okay, we all had a good laugh. Now time to vote. Gee, I wonder which one Chris wrote. It's the one that's not one of his options. Wait, what? Some requests in the chat to turn up the volume a little. Oh, okay. Pick it up, pick it up. Is that good? Yeah, that works. That'll do, pig. That'll do. to him from the director of Mad Max Fury Road. Peter, has Rift Tracks finished doing all the Captain Marvel shorts or they're still on us? I think we'll finish them this year. It's a stupid number. It's like fourteen or sixteen. Oh, okay. How many there are. We should finish them this year. It's the very first live action DC piece of media ever, technically. Well, incredible sometimes it's simplicity I know he's got to be a blockbuster yeah but it's not legally actionable this is very useful valuable your employer can't let you oh it is a good yeah chris Yeah, this short is great. Just completely inapplicable job advice for like twelve minutes. Right. Oh, this is a good mix. When I was playing it earlier today, it was a lot of the newer clips. Nice to see some of the older ones. Oh, yeah. Yeah, what do we got here? We got, like, a lady. It looks like she's sniffing something. There could be so many of them. I think in order, it's Boy in the Plastic Bubble, A Case of Spring Fever. I forgot the name of this kiddie short. Four, you should recognize Chris as Bride of the Gorilla. Oh, yeah. And five is David and Hazel, and six is Spiker. It's almost like I had to watch these clips hundreds of times making this game. Right of the Girl, a great little movie. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. Are you working on any new clip sets right now for it? That will probably be a stretch reward for the Kickstarter. Control the email server. Make yourself so valuable your employer can't let you go. Get good at hand jobs. Make yourself so valuable your employer can't let you go. Oops, Elon just decided you're not valuable. Tough shit. Make yourself so valuable your employer can't let you go. Or become the office drunk. Everyone will love your antics. Make yourself so valuable your employer can't let you go. Sir, I'm the president of Ukraine. Make yourself so valuable your employer can't let you go. I feel like this is how Doge decides which rights I get to have. It did Doge. Got your favorite? Vote now. If this were a comedy club, I'd have my giant hook out from the side by now. Ugh. Ugh. Yeah, how do you all decide on when you're putting together new packs and stuff? Is it always a holiday you have in mind? Or is there just like... It's honestly just when we think we have like a good batch of stuff we can put together just because of how the app stores work. It only really makes sense for us financially to kind of release stuff in like sixty or seventy little clip chunks. So I've started flagging titles that we'll have in the next one. A lot of stuff over the last like nine months or so. I think we'll be able to include Time Cop in that actually. I should check because we got Point Break in the game. Well, you got point break in this already? Yeah, point break's in there. I haven't come across that yet. Yeah. Handjobs. Give a dry handjob to your boss. Let him know. Oh, no. Dry. Use some sandpaper, you know? Ugh. Like a cat's tongue down there, you know? No. Uh, Matt's been drinking. Alright, say it. You think I'm awful. Alright, say it. You think I'm awful. I think the context of that is her husband is actively lying to her about losing his job at work and she's suspicious of it. She's supposed to have some aspersions cast on her for being suspicious of this terrible thing he actually did. What a great short. Well, if he doesn't have a job, where does he go every day? the track that kind of tracks for the time period turns out he's actually the son of sam he's been out killing people he's listening to that dog he's listening me and the dog are just gonna go to work today we're gonna oh we got an amazing bulk clip on screen look at that oh yeah I haven't watched that yet. Yeah, we actually got the star and the guy who plays the bulk in one shot to get interviewed by Bill. And it was a trip. Sorry, what? I was thinking about the D. Could use some bullying. All right, say it. You think I'm awful? No, you're just stuck in the cold. All right, say it. You think I'm awful? I think you're a rancid bitch. Wow. Oh my god. Oh no. This will ruin your pan and your dishwasher. Here we go again. Time to vote. Yeah, stuff like the amazing bulk that was like clearly that was going to be in the game. Yeah. What have we done recently? It's been a blur getting ready for the Kickstarter. And you guys are back in Nashville this year, right? Yeah, we're back in Nashville this year. We did the one year in Minneapolis because with Point Break being the big deal it was, we wanted to do a larger theater. Yeah. But we're back home in Nashville, humble Nashville. We're going to be doing the Grand Ole Opry, the Riffrax Cruise. Oh, man, I wish that'd be sweet. I would love that. Wear like a sparkly vest. Yeah. Have a slide guitarist play me on stage. You wear that Garth Brooks shirt that has the black and white squares all over it. Yes, yes, yes. Nice work, Happy Jeffy. Good job, Hef. Aw, I only got two silvers for that. Rancid bitch. Rancid. Round four. Martian? What's so good about having a sister? Oh my god. What's so good about having a sister? Time to bring the funny. Enter your rift now. Forgive me for this riff. I saw someone asking about a live show in Canada and why Nashville. So Canada, the movie theater chains in Canada are operated by a separate network, so it's kind of difficult. I think we ended up being in like fifty to a hundred last year for Point Break. And I don't know what the situation is this year, but if we do get showings in Canada, it will be in a similar number of theaters. Dan Wally asked, why did they stop broadcasting live? So basically, when we brought it down to one live show... it was for two reasons one it's a lot it's a lot less expensive yeah number two there would it lowers the chance of technical problems to almost zero which I think is the biggest yeah that's a big thing I would totally do that she can give me feedback on my drag race outfit what's so good about having a sister they've got the good blood when you get stabbed get me oh god what I've seen a lot of movies about how great it is to have a step-sister. You can give them Beatles haircuts like mine. She does have like the George Harrison going. What's so good about having a sister? My last name is Targaryen, so use your imagination. What's so good about having a sister? Free haircuts. The riffs are in. Time to vote. Yeah, but to circle back to that, it's really, if we're only going to have the one live show a year, and with so many theaters closing, we have fans who drive like ninety minutes, two hours plus to go see the show. And if, you know, a storm knocks out like a satellite connection and they drove two hours out of their way, like it just kind of kills us. Yeah. So it it saves on money and it also just lowers the chance for shenanigans like that. It's kind of a miracle you guys were able to do it. I could not imagine, on top of just putting on a live show at a theater, everything that can go wrong without your control. You're completely out of your control. Yeah, no, in like the thing about Nashville, like a lot of that section of the South has thunderstorms quite often. So when you're broadcasting out of there, like it's not an uncommon occurrence that we'd have a lot of strong rain or wind. So like that would present a number of issues. So, yeah, it's really just to make the experience better in the theater. Would you check out the riffing skills on this guy? Good job. You're doing a great job there, Danny. All right, moving up in the ranks. Ooh, I'm second somehow. Okay, Rippers, it's the final round. Don't come any nearer. Don't touch me. Don't come any nearer. Don't touch me. I got all this dubbed over like Italian or Spanish horror films. I don't remember which one this is. should I why not the last round marinara horror instead of spaghetti western I kind of live for that that's great and there's enough of them mcmarinara horror thing so you got like spaghetti western marinara horror is there like a like a like chicken parm drama a zd romance zd romance like pizza action I don't know yeah should have stopped at zd romance uh So you've seen some love for Ziti romance. There we go. You've got something. Don't touch me. Are you wearing that Eau de Buff scent again? Don't come any nearer. Don't touch me. Mike Pence's wedding night with mother. Don't come any nearer. Don't touch me. Egg. Don't come any nearer. Don't touch me. I just blew up the bathroom. I'm mad I'm voting this for gold, but it's the one that made me laugh the most. Egg, egg, egg. Egg. I'm also awarding someone who made a French joke. It was eau de beef. Eau de beef. Adam says, odd riffs tonight. I think it's always whenever we play this, it's odd. Egg's kind of running joke we have over here, Peter. We were playing this with Mary Jo one time. It was one of the egg clips, and I think I riffed on it. Just egg. That was the entire riff. It's haunted us for years now. Occasionally, egg will return. I love that short. Courtesy of the egg people. It's so stupid. I love it. weird Juno synth soundtrack. Egg, egg, egg, egg. Oh, I'm just so proud of you. Well done, Danny. Yeah, well done. I think Danny probably won this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And the winner is... Danny! You did it! Yay! You beat Egg. You're so proud of yourself. The only reason I voted for you, Danny, is because I couldn't vote for Egg. It wouldn't let me. You won a technicality. No, I'm kidding. You did a fantastic job. Great job, everybody. Good job, Danny. Good job, everyone. Good job, team. Good job. If this was a basketball game, this would be the part where we all walk past each other and do that awkward high five while we're walking. Yeah. This has been so much fun. Thank you so much, Peter, for coming on the program. Happy to do it. You were the voice of the baby ghost. That's unfortunate. Very unfortunate. Yeah, it's been a lot of fun. Happy to come on whenever you guys want. Yeah, and congrats on the Kickstarter launch. It's already... I'm sure by this time tomorrow, it'll be... You guys are at two... Oh my God, it's like firing up. Yeah, it's like... Yeah, it's... Like I said, every year it's insane just to see how generous everyone is. Movie riffing fans are phenomenal. There's really nothing else to say. We are aware, yeah. It's always great. It's so awesome to see just a deserving group of people meet all their goals to get all their stuff funded. So it's well done to y'all. Thank you. Thank you. I did the most work, so I deserve all the thanks. Yeah, everyone head to rifftracks.com slash kickstarter. We don't have any more donations or anything. I believe we're all caught up. Let's double check. Yeah, we're all caught up there. Everyone check out Peter's new podcast. Yeah, that sounds great. I know I had the name of it up here. The Monsters Are Due. Named after a famous Twilight Zone episode. The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street. With that phrasing, it makes it sound like the monsters, like O-Rent or something, the way you phrased it. Like, look, the monsters are due, okay? It's the first of the month. honestly that's what we should call paying rent from now on the monsters are due uh yeah the monsters are due podcast.com everyone check that out yep new episode dropping tomorrow awesome and what episode is that that I think you said walking distance walking distance yeah so very sentimental uh pull at your heartstrings episode Yeah, and be sure to keep your eyes peeled on Rift Tracks' social media as they announce their stretch goals and things. You never know who or what might show up. You never know. You never know if things might get a little dumb. No. Nice. You never know who might be a part of them. You know, it might be... You might turn it on and... I was trying to think of someone stupid who would be involved in this. Like, it's a... You know... There's the Kickstarter poster. He's a king now, man. Come on. Respect the king. Oh, Van Damme. Yeah, I know. Look at my love. And it's, wait, it says in theaters August fourteenth. Isn't there a second date too? Yeah, it's also in August nineteenth. Yeah. Oh, okay. Great. You also did the British spelling of theaters for some reason. Oh, yeah. But that's fine. It makes us feel classy. Yeah. You should have said it's in the cinema on that day. It's going to be in the cinema. Thanks so much, everyone, for hanging out tonight. Head to dumb-industries.com slash superdumbbros. Join the free super club. And if you're watching on Twitch, we'll be back with our dumb television programming right after this. And what's playing on RiffTrax last night? We can read back over to there. Oh, yeah. Let's see. Playing a Rutger Howard movie earlier. Oh, it's a riff tracks. Oh, is this a Miami connection? Yeah. Oh, that's a great one. Yeah. Let's let's, let's go right over there. You can do that. And I'm going to have fired up over here. Let me put on trap. Maybe I'll put on some animal movies, some animal movies. So if you'd like to watch James Brolin fight a dog, fight several dogs, that is an option as well. All right, everyone. Thanks so much. Thanks for watching, everybody. See you next Monday.

Matt has returned from the dead and is back for an all-new Super Dumb Bros. as he re-enters the world of Hyrule for another adventure through The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword! Part one of a two-part playthrough. Plus: a round of Tee KO that explicitly bans penises.

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Chicago. A man is about to get on a routine flight. Suddenly, he pauses. He doesn't know why, but he's got to walk away. An hour later, the plane goes down in flames. It's dismissed as chance. Britain. A woman has a sudden image of a black mountain that's moving, with children trapped underneath it. Two hours later, a Welsh schoolhouse is buried in an avalanche of coal slag. It's dismissed as coincidence. Northern Texas. An unidentified flying object is reported by at least a dozen people. Although there were no storms in the area, it's dismissed as lightning. Now, Time Life Books announces an important new library, Mysteries of the Unknown, a series that explores the most controversial phenomena of our time and tells you everything that can be known. The Midwest. A mother feels a sharp pain in her right hand. Far away at that exact same moment, her daughter screams as she touches a hot pan. Just chance? Or is it telling us something about our own untapped capabilities? Mysteries of the Unknown goes deeper into unexplained phenomena than ever before. It documents the facts, and it covers what people were never willing to talk about. Stonehenge. A visitor fashions a wire antenna in the shape of an ancient Egyptian symbol. He points it at the stones, and a surge of power rushes into his arm, knocking him unconscious. Was it all in his mind, or was it much more than that? To experience Mysteries of the Unknown, examine your first volume, Mystic Places, for ten days free. Then decide if you want to dismiss it. To order your first book, Mystic Places, call... Examine it for ten days. Keep it in pages... Other books will follow. One about every other month. Keep only the ones you want. Cancel at any time. Call... Man your battle stations. The enemy's armed for battle. It's our move, sir. Page four. It's electronic talking battleship. The troll boat. Heads. With real voice command. Real battle sound. Carrier. Heads. He got us, sir. He's clever. Against a bull or against a computer. We missed. First to sink his enemy's fleet wins. Battleship sunk. What now, sir? Can you swim, Nelson? Battleship and electronic talking battleship from Milton Bradley. You sunk my battleship. We're going for a ride in the car Hey mama, mama Hey daddy, daddy Buckle me into my safety seat My safety seat Watching the world from my safety seat As we go for a ride in the car, car, car When we want to go near or far, far, far We'll be safe when we ride in the car Here's my nephew, Scruff, about to run into trouble again. Hey, Bobo, where's your video game? In here. Well, look at this. Uh-oh. It's my dad's. Who want to hold it? What'll I do? You'll see. But that's not the only problem he has. Hey, here's a shortcut. Not down there, Square. I don't think it's safe. Come on, the coast is clear. I'm not taking a chance, Lance. Oh, no. Whoa, whoa. Hello, dog face. Come and give us your sneakers. Uh-oh. Trouble again, Scruff. What are you going to do now? I don't know. If you get my new comic activity book, More Adventures with Scruff, you'll find out what you can do about bullies, drugs, and guns. Am I the hero again? You'll see. And you'll see lots of games. Cool. For your free copy of my new comic activity book, write Scruff the Gruff, Chicago, Illinois, Scruff, scruff, Chicago, Illinois, six, oh, six, five, two. And you'll be helping take a bite out of crime. I want it, I want it. In Japan, the art of folding paper is origami. Now experience the art of folding hair with Hairigami for beautiful folded hair fashions that will amaze you. Roll it up and let the spring action roll your hair into the perfect bun. Just lift and fold for these new hair fashions. The thirty page glamour guide shows you how. It's perfect for special occasions like weddings, proms or parties. The Art of Folding Hair, yours for fourteen ninety-nine. Call and get a second hairagami for double buns and more. All of today's callers also get the Snap Action Scrunchie. Ask about the new styling video and learn to make a pony heart. You get the hairagami, a second hairagami, the Snap Action Scrunchie and the glamour guide for fourteen ninety-nine. You must be eighteen or older to call. Crush on you. Hello, hunks. It's Dream Phone, the electronic game with the talking phone. To win, call guys, get clues, figure out which guy really likes you. He's not wearing a hat. Bye, guys. What'd he say? My secret. It's for you. He's not at the beach. See you later. Guys. It's Dan. Dan's my man. You're right. I really like you. Yes. Dream Phone, the hot electronic talking phone game. It's for you. Maybe these will help. Sunglasses? Like the ones Jim West wears in that new Wild Wild West movie. Now at Burger King, you can get your own pair of Wild Wild West sunglasses from the new action-packed movie for just a dollar ninety-nine with any tasty Western Whopper value meal. Who's Jim West? I don't know. What's a movie? When you have it your way, it just tastes better. In reality, a Jolly Rancher candy is three-fourths of an inch by three-fourths of an inch square. But the virtual reality of its taste is immeasurable. Jolly Rancher candy. The great tastiest fruit, squared. Let's say Spider-Man is like Castrol Syntec motor oil. And this is a harmful particle in your engine. Get the point? You see, Syntec's patented stabilizers seek out and neutralize harmful particles, protecting in ways other oils can't. Castrol Syntec. The active lubricant. Hey dudes, bedtime! Do you A. Obey the babysitter, B. Beg to stay up, C. Hit her with thermonuclear breath? It's Godzilla, king of the monsters. His eyes flash as he roars, his arms swing, feet stomp, tail whips. Godzilla rules. Collect Godzilla and all his friends of destruction, then fight the ultimate battle where no one is safe. Cool hair. Batteries not included. From Trendmasters. Yes. Even in the storm, they're ready for war. Small soldiers, big battles. Commando, report. Prep bazooka. Ready to annihilate Gorgon. I saw. Send in the major artillery. The buzzsaw tank. Special delivery from Slamfist. Commandos always win. I see it differently. Small soldiers, big battles. You can get a hold of a small soldier. Figures and vehicles sold separately. Total Teamwork, Total Tech, Total Justice! Led by new Fractal Armor Fat Men and his thundering optical cannon, these heroes are powered by Fractal Tech gear, making them stronger than ever! Superman's crushing Kryptonite Ray makes crime pay, and new Hawkmen's titanic talons take hold of terror! Now the forces of evil feel the ultimate fractal fury as the demonic Despero is doomed! Total Teamwork, Total Tech, Total Justice! Figures each sold separately from Kenner! For a limited time, the McLobster sandwich is ashore at McDonald's. Filled with Atlantic Canadian lobster meat and crispy lettuce on a fresh bun, it's bound to make a splash with everyone. Well, almost everyone. Hurry and catch yours today. And remember, participating McDonald's drive-thrus are now open twenty-four hours. Don't forget your GigaPets. Whoa, doggies, Madonna's hungry. Don't upset your GigaPets. Dino do. Don't neglect your GigaPets. If you want your Giga to grow bigger, you gotta figure how to care for your Giga. Vivi wants to play. Now you can get Computer Koala, Blocky Frog, and Salem the Cat from Sabrina the Teenage Witch. GigaPets from Tiger, each sold separately. You gotta love them. Its popularity knows few boundaries. Its creature comforts are out of this world. It's number one in its class. For those who spend a lot of time in class. Saban Entertainment puts kids in the driver's seat by bringing the high performance of Saban's Masked Rider to home video. I can do zero to sixty faster than you can say. Each video miniseries contains two action-packed episodes from the hottest new weekly show from the Fox Kids Network. Kids love Saban's Masked Rider, the action-adventure comedy series about a young teenager from outer space who lands in the backyard of the Stewart family. Home Life is turned upside down when they adopt the young superhero and his cuddly pet, Purvis, who always seems to get into mischief. Our hero's identity must be kept secret as he battles the evil Count Dragon and his galactic insectivores who seek to destroy Masked Rider and all of planet Earth. With the help of Magno, the amazing talking car, I'm sleek, sporty and fun. and Comeback Chopper, the incredible talking motorcycle, Remember, two wheels are better than four! Masked Rider must save the Earth. Masked Rider is an explosive hit. This show gives better mileage than I do. It just goes to show you, kids love talking motorcycles. Now on video, get Escape from Edenoy, the special two-part miniseries with bonus action footage never seen on TV. Plus, the exciting special two-part miniseries, Super Gold, with a bonus special guest appearance by the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. Grab the excitement, the thrill, the intrigue of Saban's Masked Rider on home video. Next Saturday. Come on! From the creators of the Star Wars saga. The bold adventure of courage and daring. Mace, we're lost! Where heroes become legends. And the only thing you can be sure of is magic. Lucasfilm presents Ewok Adventure next Saturday. Introducing new Fruitomic Punch Gushers! With a taste that's gonna drive you fruity! It's very, very different! And totally appealing! It's new Fruitomic Punch Gushers! The fruit snack bursting the juicy fruit punch in the middle! So fruity, they'll really turn your head! Whoa, I'll say! New Fruitomic Punch Gushers! The blast of fruit punch is gonna drive you totally fruity! Man, I gotta split! I'm excited DJ Humberbund When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you. When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you. If I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you. If I heaver, yeah I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who's heavering to you. But I would walk by. Five hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your door When I'm working, yes I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who's working hard for you And when the money comes in for the work I do I'll pass almost every penny on to you Shake, shake, shake, Senora, shake your body line. Shake, shake, shake, Senora, shake it all the time. Work, work, work, Senora, work your body line. Work, work, work, Senora, work it all the time. But I would walk five hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more just to be the man who walks a thousand miles to fall down and shoot two. When I'm lonely, well I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who's lonely without you And when I'm dreaming, well I know I'm gonna dream I'm gonna dream about the time when I'm with you Woo! Yeah! Once you've had Invisible, you'll never go back, baby. It's not a helmet, it's a slow cooker. Wouldn't the theremin at least make you turn around? Want to go out for breakfast? Let's not forget he's still nude under there. Don't come near me. If he were a male comedian, she should be worried. I'm warning you, don't come near me. Rock beats scissor. Oh no, he's going to start crafting. Hello, my baby. Hello, my darling. Hello, my ragtime gal. He's tapping out, get me some pants. Coming soon to Weird and Wonderful Wednesday Watchalongs. There's a man who makes the hunters tremble when they meet him. They call him Silence. Because after he passed away, there is only silence left. Who is that spiritist guy with the hat, like a priest with a sword? Tigranes. One who is better lost than found. Form around people like Jeffrey Dahmer drives this one. I had this idiot out there that cut right in front of me this morning. Nobody seems to care that you're driving a school bus. And for sure, different attitudes form around things like the driving job itself. That bus they gave me this morning. Steers like a truck and the clutch is bad. Not my fault if the kids got a jerky ride. Not my fault if all the kids died. If you kids don't shut up right now, I'm gonna close all the windows and turn up the heater. When you guys choose the paintings, they always seem to fit. We're coming into some difficult times, I think, and I'd like to think that the guy in office right now just pissed off a whole lot of people. To me, I don't know, it just kind of feels... a little bit empowering in a time when I don't feel like I have much control over much of anything at the moment. So I have control over this. I can do this. My deceased has been quite Queen Elizabeth. You know, that's funny you said that, because when I was painting her the first time, I was thinking the same thing. She looked kind of queenly. majestic you know oh gracious jessica walton I love that he's still in the cape, the giant heavy cape. take off the ring there it is the ring fine it won't come off nobody expects the ironside inquisition Yeah, watching him walk around and do nothing is so much more interesting than seeing the killings by the monster. Will he walk into another room? Or stay in this room? Oh my god, the suspense is killing me! Aye, aye, aye. I've got his cataracts. Oh, damn, marriage agrees with me. Oh, now I can't do the Harpo Groucho theater scene. Well, that was a productive afternoon. This is like a real estate video. My dinner with Andre didn't have this many indoor scenes. What up, what up? Oh, you're on mute, Matt. First I was on mute, then you were on mute. No, you're still on mute, and I'm not on mute. Unless no one can hear me right now, which is very much possible. What's the chat say? Can you guys hear either of us? Okay, how about now? There we go. I knew something weird would happen because this is the first time I've set up both my Switch and me at the same time. And I knew that there would be at least one weird thing to happen. But usually once you iron out one weird thing, it's good for a while. So let's hope and pray there. Hopefully. Hopefully. Well, hope and pray. Hopes and prayers. Hi, everybody. How's it going? Happy Monday. We all made it. We all survived another one. We all made it. Matt, you're alive. I'm alive, yeah. You missed last week's show, first time you've ever missed... I wouldn't say I've been missing it, Bob. No, yeah, it was the first one of these that you did solo. I kind of popped in the chat every once in a while, but yeah, I was undergoing, without getting too graphic, some preparation for a procedure, so I was offline. And since then, I have been through said procedure, and I am fine, and I am alive, and everything looks good, so... So anybody who's been curious about any of those things, that's what's going on there. But most importantly, I am back to keep playing dumb video games with all of you. That's the most important thing, Matt. To do impressions of Gollum singing songs by Brooks and Dunn, you know? I'm I'm concerned now because big rig blues asks are matt and chris going to talk or are they just messing with us like I'm scared that we're all on mute and now the chat is messing with us to try to convince us that they can't hear oh my god that would be so great if the entire chat could gaslight us into thinking that we weren't being heard even if it could happen oh okay he was just messing with us Matt, your ass is fine, David Pinkston says. Thank you, David. It's much appreciated. My ass is fine in numerous ways, it turns out, after this week. DM me for pics. That's what your OnlyFans is for, Matt. We discussed this. That's what the Dumb Industries OnlyFans is going to be for. It's going to be pictures of that and then pictures of my feet in sandals. That's going to be... That is pretty hot. We should put our tax returns on there, too. Ooh, yeah. That's naughty. That's not a good idea. Anyway. Anyway, that's all to say, Chris spent several weeks playing through Grand Theft Auto, and that was sort of a neat experiment. You play in one game just for a long while, so now I'm going to play a little bit more of a video game that I started playing back in June of last year. We did an entire special broadcast... to start playing Skyward Sword. I had it... I had this, like, I don't know, thought in my head that I wanted to play through all the Zelda games in the official Zelda timeline order. There is an official Zelda timeline, which I can talk about more in detail over the stream if you would like to hear how depressing it is that I know all of this and I'm like a thirty-four year old man. But there is an entire timeline that begins with this game. This is the very first game, so that's why I thought it would be fun to do this and it sets up stuff and as we discovered during our last broadcast it's very wordy we got all the exposition parts of the way during that broadcast I think someone someone in the discord server actually referred tonight uh tonight as matt story time with matt Yeah, we got most of that out of the way. This is one of the more very on-the-rails Zelda games. For those of you that don't know or haven't already intuited, I love The Legend of Zelda games. I've played most of them, beat a lot of them, not all of them, but... But yeah, I've played enough of them to know what's good and what's not good. And this one is an okay game. It's very okay. We're going to have to set up because I got the Wind Waker remaster on my Wii U going. Maybe we can do that for a couple weeks sometime too. That would be tight. I haven't seen the Wind Waker remaster. I played the original one for the GameCube. That would be fun to just play that for a few weeks together. That would be awesome. You could see all that stuff. Zelda's a fun game to kind of play with two people because there's one person who can kind of be like no go over there like the thing is over there like or googling answers like you that's you and then I'm the guy who's just wandering around aimlessly like wait what yeah if you'd like a preview of what that'll be like go look up our stream where we played Ocarina of Time together oh that's right and I was like yeah you set that on fire and then you light that torch and that torch and you're like how do you know that I'm like how do you not it's all just right there these games are intuitive if you grew up with them otherwise I think uh they're just they have to dumb it down like I feel like wind waker was dumbed down for people like me so that you could just play it and have fun it does feel like a more like it's weird to the sort of uh sort of uh tone that these things breadth because you know the newer zelda game uh tears of the kingdom is a very adult very dark kind of game and then when waker like you just talked about feels like very all ages and Yeah, Mac, get a little closer to your mic. Oh, I'm sorry. You also can't, it's covering like your entire face. Oh, do I need to move my thing out of the way? I think you just got to get closer to it. You just got to get closer. Okay. Ever since I've changed out office chairs, I got a new office chair and the wheels on this one are better. And I'll just start like Dr. Evil-ing my way away from the thing, you know? I would sit down and just... That's me all the time because I live on Park Slope and they mean slope here. It is quite a slope I live I live in the Batman sixty-six TV show where everything is just slightly angled all the time Anyway, Matt Matt is gonna be playing Matt's gonna be playing tonight's game I'm gonna be checking out the chat and just want to remind folks before we get going you can watch tonight's program completely ad-free over at dumb industry stock slash super dumb bros join the free super club get rid of twitch ads don't pay a dime yeah and if you'd like to send in a donation a donation of any dollar amount will yield you a shout out in the form of one of our patented terrible impressions or you can ask us a question you could put a little note there when you when you when you send in a donation We already have our first donation of the night. Oh, nice. Very cool. Thank you so much. So, yes, you can ask us a question. You can challenge us to an impression. You can put nothing in and we'll just go wild. But you can. Those are always fun. You can always kind of gauge where I'm at mental health wise with how weird the impressions get. It's like a real Rorschach test into your head. So this first one comes from our good friend, Charlotte Greenwell. Charlotte, thank you. Charlotte is an amazing artist as well. I want to show you, we had a class on Saturday with Jackie Naiman Jones. We all paint, we watched the green slime and then we painted the green slime. It was really groovy. Great movie, great paintings, great jobs, everyone. This was Charlotte's here. This is called Slime Freakout. that is awesome right look at him he's just boogieing because there's a theme song on the green slime and it's like funky slime gets funky in that movie um but we had some oh whoops wrong brand it ain't thursday it's monday there we go um thank you charlotte is so cool and thank you yes thank you thank you uh how should we thank charlotte Oh, there's nothing in there? No. No. No. You go first. All right. Well, Charlotte, it's Don Knotts. I'm a little confused here because usually you donate on Thursday, but it's Monday. Well, we appreciate it either way. I'm Don Knotts. Bye. Remember when Don Knotts was in that movie Pleasantville? Have you ever seen that movie? I have seen Pleasantville. Was he in that? He's in it. He's the TV repairman. Oh, yeah. And he basically displays Don Knotts if he was a TV repairman. It's a great movie, actually. Yeah, that movie rocks. All right. I don't know. I'm completely blanking over here. I'm sorry. Why don't you start playing? I'm having a rough Monday back. Give me a second. Let my mental health, mental illness juices get a flow, and then I'll cook up something good for you, Charlotte. Turn off your echo cancellation. There we go. All righty. Matt, are you still with us? I think we lost you, Matt. And I gotta turn that music off. Turn it off. Turn that music off. Turn it off. Off. Off. Don't turn Matt's mic off. Turn it off. Off. Off. I can't hear Matt anymore. Take it off. Off. Off. I just saw De La Soul a couple weeks ago, a few weeks ago, at Lincoln Center. Been listening to a lot of De La Soul the past few weeks. Oh, well now Matt's game is coming in super clear. We can't see him, but man, look at that resolution on the game. Here he is. Okay, I don't know what keeps happening. Can you hear me now? Yes. Okay, good. Anytime, like, yeah, like you bring up the two stream yards, something funky happens. Sorry, everybody. Anyway, you're getting a nice little fill-in on the backstory of this one is Basically the backstory of this one is that Link and Zelda are the member of a group of people who live in the sky and ride around big terrifying birds. And one day Link rides the terrifying- he wins a terrifying bird contest and he gets to kiss Princess Zelda and they're hanging out. And she falls into a tornado or something hits her or something. So she goes missing beneath the clouds and Link becomes the very first person to ever go beneath the cloud barrier in his generation of people. And that's basically where we leave off in the game is you're looking for Zelda who has been either knocked to the ground or taken captive by something. Got it. That pretty much catches us up to speed, I think. These games are pretty basic, but this one tries to get this one tries to go like super deep with the story. It tries to be like a Final Fantasy game almost where it's like nobody cares about the story that much. Anyway, Mike, we got it. Mike, I almost called you Mike. Matt, we need to get you a new fan or something. do I need to turn my thing around? I don't know. Well, it's like if I put the reduced background noise on, it takes out like the droney sound, but then whenever you've talked, you can kind of hear the air. I can just turn it off. It's, it just gets hot in here with all the stuff over in this corner. Um, Or I could just turn it on low maybe. Maybe that's the... Maybe that's better. Maybe that's the happy medium. I cannot emphasize how poor the ventilation is in here. The fact that it looks awesome is a side effect. Okay. Skyward Sword. I don't know why it's blurry like this. It's only blurry on this one screen, though. Everything else looks like super crisp. Yeah. It's weird. Let me try to refresh just this. I'm sorry, everybody. No, I don't think it's that. I think it's go past this screen. Let's see what happens. Okay. Oh, yes. It's a little clearer now. It's a little better. Now it's fine. Okay. Now it's fine. That was so weird. That was so weird. What was that? Hey. Hey, what was going on? What was happening there? Maybe it was like a legal thing. They couldn't have the title screen in HD, even though it said HD, it was like some weird stipulation. It doesn't meet the legal requirement for high definition or some weird garbage. So now Lonk, this is the game you played a few years ago, or a few months ago. Yes, this is, as you recall, that broadcast was on, yes, June eighteenth, and that is when I stopped playing this. So this is literally picking up from where we left off. Sweet. let's do this and as we come across story elements uh that reference older things I will try to explain technical difficulties are kind of our charm but um this is the chill stream we're just hanging out and playing stuff I don't think we're that I don't mean we're no worse than any other stream um I usually figure it out okay let me try and remember what the fuck I'm doing uh language matt um I I did see someone mention uh earlier maybe I don't ask um uh objective someone mentioned if the pre-show started five minutes earlier than the live show would start on time but um That's intentional. I hope everyone knows. We always start five minutes late. Have you ever been to a live comedy thing or whatever? That's the policy. At QED, you always started ten minutes after the posted starting time. Okay, it's on display, but she is currently in motion. You must expedite your search for her. Zelda is likely to be perceived as a conspicuous character in these woods. Confirm with local lifeforms to see if they know her whereabouts. Current session point in time. Okay, I don't care then. Alright, let me try and remember. Because this one has kind of awkward controls because this was a Wii U game and they ported all the motion controls over to Switch controls and it's... Oh, so was the remaster originally for Wii U? The original was for Wii U and this is the remaster for Switch. Matt, we have our second donation of the night here from the great Claudia Burton. Thank you, Claudia. Claudia, thank you. Oh my gosh, I still need to think of something for Charlotte. Oh my god, I'm having... Well, Claudia has... This is what she says in the notes. It's the thirty-fifth anniversary of the day Dale Cooper drove into Twin Peaks, so we need a David Lynch impression. Did you know that? That that's today? I think I saw some posts this morning. I think Inga texted me about that earlier. That's funny. Uh... Yeah, you do a David Lynch shout-out. I'll do a David Lynch, yes. Claudia! Thank you for reminding me that today is the day Dale Cooper entered Twin Peaks. I remember writing that script very well. I was sitting in a Bob's Big Boy with a notebook, and Laura Dern was sitting across from me, and she dropped one of her earrings into her ketchup, and I said, Stand still! I have an idea! that I sketched in my notebook for quite some time. And I drew Dale Cooper. I didn't know who he was, but I decided to put him in a show called Twin Peaks. Don't ask why. It just happened. Thank you, Claudia. Uh... okay so I really wonder what my neighbor thinks of it because prior to um me moving my office in here I was in another part of the apartment there's no way any neighbor could hear me unless they were like you know putting their ear on the floor or something yeah uh but now I'm like I'm right next to my neighbor's living room Anyway, here is your song worked into the tune of the song Mickey by Tony Basil as sung by one Randy Newman, Claudia. Oh, Claudia, you so fine, you so fine, you blow my mind. Hey, Claudia. Claudia. Hey, Claudia, what a pity. Randy don't understand when you take it by the heart, when you take it by the hand. Oh my god, that just reminded me. Thank you so much, Claudia. That was an impression that did better in my head, and then I did it out loud, and it kind of just made less sense as I did it sometimes. You just reminded me, I was in Trader Joe's doing some grocery shopping. Very nice. And they always play good music in there. And it's funny, because I always go in there listening to my own music, but then there's no service in the basement. It's a basement Trader Joe's. Oh. But by the time I get down there, it's like, I got to listen to Trader Joe's music. And they always have really cool music. I want to find out who's making the playlist in there. But they had the song from Mulholland Drive that's singing the first time the director sees Naomi Watts' character. It's like, Sixteen Reasons Why I Love You or something. oh yeah I don't know if it's I don't know if that was written specifically for that movie or if it's just an old song but it's it's so good and the scene that it's in in the movie is like one of my favorite scenes ever yeah you have just inspired me uh because uh claudia was saying it was twin peaks day uh I could do uh here's tiny tim singing uh what's that song from blue velvet in dreams you know yeah This can also be, this is a combination, I'm getting really fast and loose with the donations tonight. This is a combination. Charlotte and Claudia, a shout out. This is Tiny Tim's rendition of In Dreams by Roy Orbison. A candy color clown they call the sad man tiptoes through my room every night. just a sprinkle stardust and he whispers go to sleep everything is all right I don't know if I can do the whole thing uh I hope that was good that was good I wonder whose neighbors bleeding to hate us more do you think my neighbor hates me more or like just like a pure level of like hatred one to ten yeah I hate me more or do they hate matt more matt does ichabod I mean that's that's intense that's that's pretty rough but I I do that very uh occasionally and sparingly uh Whoa, it got blurry again. That's weird. Okay. Now it's crisp. What the heck? Now that I think that I have done Tiny Tim, I think I feel warmed up. I feel like I was kind of out of it. You take a week off from doing this, you get kind of rusty, and I feel like I need to... I'm back in the groove. Okay, so I was following a little critter around, and now I need to find the little critter again. Find that little critter. Because this little critter may know what happened to Princess Zelda. The blurriness almost looks like intentional. It's very strange. Yeah. I don't know if it would be better if I refreshed or no, no, no. I think it's like the game even like, well, you're, are you playing on your, you're just playing directly in stream yard, right? Yeah. I've got a, yeah. I plugged into my video card and I've got that. Yeah. The video out, but are you using a monitor? uh I'm just I'm just playing straight off the stream yard window now it looks fine it's just it's like odd but it's totally cool oh here we go why do these things always exist in zelda like they're hidden little guys who are just hanging out because these are games are all about exploring and finding little nooks and crannies and getting all the stuff and have you ever one hundred percented a zelda game I have ninety nine point ninety something percented Tears of the Kingdom. If I just found a couple more of the Korok seeds, I would have one hundred percent of it. So now how do you do that? You just look it up? uh pretty much yeah uh a lot of them you can find just by running around but then yeah you get to a certain point where that map is so massive and there are so many of those seeds and you get to where there's like only you know nineteen left or something which is where I was and uh and yeah and I'm like so maxed out on power I can just routinely play at the end of the game for fun and beat it like it's no big deal and it's you know reset speed right before and then I can amazing it's uh so yeah tears of the kingdom I got my money's worth out of that one I put a lot of time into that and I haven't really picked it up since jay poe completed one hundred percent of the original legend of zelda there we go um someone asked what the co-op game blue eyed lady asked what the co-op game is We're going to put it to a vote again. I've been liking just leaving it to you guys to figure out. We don't like making decisions. If we can just outsource that. Sometimes people are in a different mood. It seems like a group thing. People either all want to play a game or they're not in the mood for it. I just put that link in the chat. Everyone can start voting. We'll take a look at it in a little bit. And we're caught up on donations, right? Oh, we have one more here. Oh, nice. How about this? From Spyrocythe. Oh, thank you, Spyrocythe. Thank you. Spyrocythe says, this is a stretch, but how about Barney Fife rapping, rest in peace to the game because I'm fresh to the death. Rest in peace to the game. Tell them kill they self. From Sugarfinger by Lil Wayne. You know, that timeless gem that everyone knows. I don't know that, but I can just be Barney Fife and just pretend like I'm rapping. Just look up the lyrics to it and then just read it without knowing anything about it. That could also be funny. Barney Fife rapping. Rest in peace to the game, cause I'm fresh to the death. Rest in peace to the game, tell them to kill they self. Word. Rest in peace to the game, cause I'm fresh to the death. Michael McDonald is resting in peace. I'm now a rap guy. Thank you, Spyro Scythe. We look forward to your latest nightmare meme, right? Spyro Scythe's the one that does the meme, right? Yes. I'm sure Barney Fife will make an appearance. Anyway, so I'm talking to this giant testicle, as you can see, and it seems to know where Princess Zelda may be located. A pack of these mean red guys were after her, but she escaped with the Kikwi Elder. Today is Abe Vigoda's birthday. How old is he now? Three thousand. He's been dead for a little bit now, but not as long as you would think. Only for a little bit, though. Not as long as you would think. Oh, wow. He died in twenty sixteen. January twenty sixteen. So he got out at a good time. Like he didn't have to see David Bowie die or Prince die or Trump get elected. But when did he die? January twenty sixteen at the age of ninety. It doesn't say the specific day. I was about to say, did he did he see the Capitol get stormed? Was was Ava go to. That's what I'm saying. January, twenty six, twenty sixteen. So, OK. OK, so that was right after that. No, Matt, that happened in twenty twenty one. What are you talking about? What I'm having dementia on the stream. That's what's happening. I think I'm saying he died before before. OK, before David Bowie died, before Prince died, before Trump got elected. Now I've had a complete stroke. You were talking about for twenty twenty for some reason. Wait for twenty. Who said anything about four twenty? yeah I'm great uh you're kind of like now you're I feel like now your camera is blurring out a little bit oh yeah I noticed that too uh oh I know what it is I know what it is oh is there some it's your continuity camera um it's on for both your switch and you that's why it's doing that hang on is there a way I can turn this off or did you already I can't turn it off. You have to do it on your end. Oh, my God. This is a nightmare. Oh, yeah. I had portrait mode turned on. That was probably what was causing everything to happen. There you go. Look at that. Nice and crispy. And you're nice and crisp again. A nice crispy boy. A nice little crispy boy. Okay. So I've got to locate the elder now, I believe is what's happening. I have no idea what the hell's going on uh anyway I hope everybody's monday has been good uh anything interesting popped up no in the news or I mean I mean just like you know just talking about whatever uh Yeah, I'm trying to think about what went down in Dumb Industries territory last week. Usually we talk about that on the Mystery Hour. But we had a really fun class, as I said earlier. Green Slime. Oh, yeah. And we had a little dance party at one point. It was awesome. Oh, Danny says, loving the love for TKO right now in the poll. All right, so TKO is currently in the lead, apparently. Oh, that's the shirt one? Yeah. That's a really fun one. I really enjoy doing that one. Oh, yeah, Doctor Strange on Friday. That was pretty great. Doctor Strange was definitely something. It's Parasites. I you know what it was not that bad and I know a lot of people said that but then I think a lot of people are also just talking about how boring it was and yeah it was pretty boring but it wasn't like terrible It was kind of slow. It was kind of hard. I tried to turn it down and fast forward some parts of it, but there was, you know, some of it's just kind of like slow and trippy and it's fun, you know, like when he's spiraling in the giant kaleidoscope at one point and it goes on for nine hours. I mean, that's like, that's my favorite scene. And, you know, the twenty sixteen Doctor Strange is when he's like flying through space and They show a giant hand, and then the hand grows hands, and it's so cool. People like the trippy stuff. That's what's fun about Doctor Strange. I really like the Doctor Strange movies, both of them. I know a lot of people shat on Multiverse of Madness, but... It doesn't feel very Sam Raimi-ish, but it's, you know... I thought it definitely had some Sam Raimi elements. Okay, how do I talk to this fucking giant nutsack? Hey, nutsack. Psychedelic fun. Oh, do I have to like... Hey, I gotta talk to you, you nutsack. David Pinkston, yeah. Some of the gross murders were very samurai. They also kind of had like a... some makeup that looked very much like you know evil dead makeup yeah oh yeah the I mean there are definitely scenes that feel sam raimi-ish but overall it's got that you know sort of marvel same equality where you know at certain points it all goes cg and you're like this wait sam raymond isn't it big rig blue says sam or uh bruce campbell is in it I don't remember him being in it didn't he show up in like a post credits thing or something no or maybe I'm thinking of the third Spider-Man all these movies blur together in my brain now yeah the Bruce Campbell's in all the original Spider-Man movies like different roles in each one but he's in all three of them but I don't remember yeah I don't remember the post credits sequence for Doctor Strange I think Thor was in it and he's like drinking beer yeah Well, there was like one post. I think Bruce Campbell is in one because, you know, one of the post-credits scene, like Charlize Theron pops up. Oh, right, right, right. And he gets like the weird third eye and it's supposed to be like a big deal. And then the next post-credits scene, he has his third eye and he's just walking around casually. And Bruce Campbell owns like a hot dog truck or something stupid. Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right. I forgot all about that. This thing kind of looks like Wilford Brimley. It does. Hello, I'd like to talk to you about diabetes. To be fair, if you put that mustache on pretty much anyone, they look like Wilford Brimley. Wilford Brimley looks like a president from the Civil War. It's kind of amazing. He lived as long as he did. Wilford Brimley was something like he was like thirty six when he was in Cocoon. Now he wasn't that young, but he was really young. He was like forty something. He wasn't that old. I was amazed to find out that Doctor Strange in that movie is thirty three. He says at one point and I'm thirty three. And then I saw someone in the discord post that he was like twenty eight when he made that actor. Yeah, like people just looked older back then. That's like every time I look at pictures of I love Jim Croce, the the musician, but like every picture of him, he looks like he's forty seven years old and I think he died before before he was thirty. I want to say people just looked older back then. It was. Yeah. It was a... I don't know how much of that is style and how much of that is just, you know, the air was full of lead from your gasoline and everybody smoked around you your whole life. Let's see. Cocoon came out in... Nineteen eighty-five. Wilford Brimley was born in... Nineteen thirty-four. He was fifty-one in Cocoon. I mean, I'm forty-one, so he's only ten years older than I am. And they're like, you're in a nursing home. You're so old. He did look old back then, though. That's like when you look at him in The Thing. He looks super old in that movie, and then he just looked like that forever. Oh, right. He was in The Thing. He's been in a lot of good movies. I feel much better now, and I want to come back. He's been in a lot of good stuff. You ever seen Hard Target, the Jean-Claude Van Damme movie? Is that the one where he has the mullet? I mean, yes, there's several where he has the mullet. But yeah, he has like... It's not just a mullet. It's like... Like the wettest mullet you've ever seen? It's got a life of its own. Yeah. I think I know what one you're talking about. Great movie. John Woo directed it. I think one of his first American movies. You know, before he did like Face Off and all those movies. The best John Woo movie is Mission Impossible II if you've never seen it. It's an amazing film that I love that I got to see in theaters as a thirteen year old. I've seen every Mission Impossible movie in the theater. I saw a couple of them. Now that they've become more regular again, I've missed a few. Really? They come out once every five years. But there was a good gap between the third one and when they started doing them again. When they got good... I don't know. I really like Mission Impossible three. That one's... I mean, I like all of them. They all have good qualities. Yes, even three. Three is great. The first one, I think, is the least watchable, but it's a very... The first one? I've come to appreciate it more as I got older. I like the first one a lot, yeah. But when I was younger, I was like, there's not people flying off of motorcycles at each other in this one. Okay, I've got to find these little twerps, and I... It is kind of crazy how Tom Cruise, it's like, I remember even like when Fallout came out, Mission Impossible Fallout, which is almost like ten years ago. Or Rogue Nation, maybe. Everyone was saying like, I don't know, Tom Cruise is starting to look a little old. And now it's ten years later and he looks exactly the same. Okay, there's a guy up here. I gotta figure out how to get up here. Master Toriko has only seen the first one, but watched the TV show all the time is good. TV show is pretty great. Shade is forty-eight and looks thirty-eight. Um... Yeah, Shade, I've seen pictures of you. You do look younger than thirty-eight. I'm forty-one and I look forty-one. I am nearly thirty-four and I look ready to die. Fifty. Matt, remember when that lady at the party we were at told me that... Well, first she said I looked like George Clooney if he was poor. Yeah. She specified if I had no money. She said, you look like George Clooney if he had no money. I mean, I have no money, but... I don't know how, like, I don't know if she kept repeating it too, which was weird. Like it was like, she didn't just say it once. She would like, and she would ask various people like, doesn't he look like, you know, you're like, then I told her how old I was and she was like shocked. Cause she said that I looked much younger, but at the same time, I look like I have no money according to her. You're a poor ten. Which is like a rich six or something. J-Po, was she drunk? I don't think so. No. It was kind of early in the day. It's like four or five o'clock. That was such a weird night. I also, I mean, I don't think I look anything like George Clooney, so I don't know where that came from. I mean I was wearing a shirt I think she was trying to mack on you it was what was going on and then but she was also she was married and I believe I mentioned several times I referred to jen as my wife you would be surprised what doesn't stop people uh where are these little guys oh we just got raided Party of five. Party of five. I love that show. Literally a party of five. Thank you, Fancy Grimm. Scott Wolf and Lacey Chabert and Nev Campbell are all here. Lacey Chabert, yes. Lacey Chabert and, wait, did you already say Matthew Fox? Who else? Scott Wolf. Scott Wolf and Nev Campbell, right? Oh, Nev Campbell. So, wait, who was the fifth? The baby? The little baby? Yeah. I guess the little baby. The little babin. Well, all five of them are here tonight. Thank you so much for raiding Party of Five. Maybe they're swingers. That's a possibility, Wise Twin Sailor. Swinging raiders. Ooh. Raiding swingers. That's like the Drake meme. It's like swinging raiders. Nah. Raiding swingers. Mm-hmm. OK, let me go ahead and save real fast. I got trying to get just these controls down. This is this is like the weirdest game to just like drop in on. And I'm just trying to get oriented again to like what I'm doing and everything here. Guys, if you haven't yet voted on. What our co-op game is going to be? We pinned that to the chats. We're going to start those games in about, I don't know, fifteen, twenty minutes. Something like that. Yeah. Oh, Danny says, I think the swingers comment was about the George Clooney married lady. Oh, yeah. Could have been. I don't know. I don't know. That was such a weird night because, yeah, and then we all like took the train back. And at one point it was just like me and like Dave Hill and this girl. And I'm like, what's going on? yeah Dave told me that was like really weird too he's like you just left me alone with that Mac guy nah he didn't say anything I just talked to him about witch taint stuff Devo have you done it takes two like the Ashley the Olsen twin Olsen twin movie with isn't like Ted Danson in that Maybe they made a game based on that. Maybe that's what Devo's referring to. Oh, it's a co-op game. No, we have not sent it to me. Can we play it? I want to play it. From the makers of A Way Out. I'm not familiar with A Way Out. Oh, shoot. I literally can't. I've got to find all these little guys. Oh, my God. I'm remembering how much I hate this game. Isn't it weird how, like, in all these fantasy universes, like, the flute still exists? What, like the flute you said? The flute, yeah. You always hear the flute in these fantasy stories. It's like, what? Why the flute? If anything, there should be percussion in every game. That feels more for every fantasy universe. Anyone see the trailer for Andor season two? Oh yeah, you were telling me about that. I mean, it looks great. I just question the choice of music they use from the trailer because it's just like a straight up like a pop song or something. Not a pop song, but like it's like a rock song. And they've never done that before. I feel like, you know, you don't have to go the John Williams route necessarily, but Mandalorian kind of struck a good balance of being a little more electronic and modern and And the score for Andor was like that too, but I don't know. People in the chat, sound off if you know how I can talk to this little guy. I need to talk to him. I don't know how to. Does anyone know how to talk to a little guy in Skyward Sword? I'm supposed to go find all these little guys for the big giant Wilford Brimley nutsack that I talked to a little bit ago and I can't. Oh, here we go. Oh yeah, Forest Whitaker's in the trailer. And he's got the big hair and everything. Which... Oh yeah, okay. There were weird promotional stills released for Rogue One long before the movie came out. I think they had only just announced it. And Forest Whitaker's completely bald in it. And then he shows up in one scene in the movie. Bald. the very beginning and then the rest of the movie has huge hair it's got the huge hair all taking place before the events of rogue one then yeah it's supposed to be like right before it apparently said season two is like it's gonna end leading directly into rogue one we're making like prequels to prequels now it's it's yeah It's all quite convoluted. Andor, I feel like Andor gets, it's like a weird, it almost exists outside of the rest of all these Star Wars TV shows. It feels unrelated almost entirely. Even from like Rogue One. But it fits within that continuity pretty well. Like I was telling you during our meeting, I think someone I, you know, I don't think it's really worth keeping this pitch to myself because, you know, there's no real way it would get done. But doing Columbo in Star Wars as a TV show, I think that would be. yes that would be great let's write the script do a space detective let's pitch this to lucasfilm about a private detective in star wars times who who solves the murders of like huts and yeah and he's just like a human but he's a good detective yeah he's not like a jedi and he's not like a smuggler he's he's a private detective kind of do like a blade runner yeah he could even be like hired by someone you know but who's he really being hired come on right to himself he's got like a mysterious past which I'm sure at some point the disney executives would come in and be like oh you have to make he was a jedi at some point in his past yeah he's got to refer to this wife who you never see on camera ever and then you find out her tragic backstory later That'd be so awesome though. Imagine every episode opening with like some brutal Star Wars kind of murder. And then you see how they try to clean up the scene and everything. And then halfway through it switches through and now it's Columbo in space. Yeah. And you just, you play the character almost exactly like that. Maybe you get like Matt Berry. I don't know what he's doing or if he's ever been in anything Star Wars related, but he has, he did a voice in book of Boba Fett, I think. Oh, if he's just a voice, then you can get away with you. Yeah, you could still play on. Yeah, make him a wacky detective who yeah, who solves the murders of like, you know, resolves like gambling rackets and you know, and. yeah, look at this penguin solve a murder in the cantina. Think about all the different settings you can have, all the different characters he could visit to try to get more information. Yeah, you could have little cameos every now and again because the conceit of this would be it would be a weekly show that's not tied into a longer thing or trying to be like a seventeen hour movie or something. There's no like, maybe there might be like poker face, like there's an overall plot kind of, but like week to week it's just... story of the week like it so it's like intentional like you can just watch any episode yeah we gotta write this we gotta write this my pitch to you if anyone from Lucasfilm happens to Bonnie if you happen to be watching from the Lucas people put us in touch with I was reading Talladega Nights was pitched and sold with a six word pitch which was Will Ferrell is a NASCAR driver So our pitch would just be Columbo and Star Wars. Yeah, I think Columbo's weirdly experiencing kind of like a comeback. I think you could... And people people love those kinds of shows. And I don't know if there's a new show that's kind of Inga and I watched a lot when I was visiting her. We've been rewatching Psych. That's a great show. Oh, yeah. But just shows like that. Yeah. Where it's just like kind of a hokey murder happens. And and, you know, that's not really how the police and detectives work. And it's all just very simplified because it has to be a forty five minute program. But right. Well, they were going to make that Rangers of the New Republic series, which kind of sounded like it was going to be a more procedural type show. But then that lady went insane with the anti-vax messaging. They fired her. That's unfortunate. Okay, where are more of these little purple guys? Maybe playing this from the beginning was a bad idea. Oh, one of the purple guys is up here, maybe. Purple guys, purple guys. Well, not purple guys, but like the purple ring. I am... Purple ring, purple ring. I am in a mood tonight. There's that poll link, everyone. Get your votes in. We'll pick whatever we're going to play in about ten minutes. Poker Face Season Two is coming out. David Pinkston. Very excited. Oh my god. See, it's at this point that I would have already caved if I were playing by myself and just googled where all the rest of these guys are. The little purple guys. Okay, so there's one over here, maybe? Did she go full Roseanne Polaris? Because Roseanne, it took her a while to go fully insane. Even when you thought she was at her worst. She's like, nah. Nah. Hold up. And yet, like, I don't know. She shows up on those Kill Tony specials and stuff now, so I don't know if it works. Oh, God. That Tony Hinchcliffe guy is such a fucking ghoul. He looks like he's like Slappy the Dummy from Goosebumps, if it was a person. Who likes that guy? I don't understand it. Wait, I saw it. Danny says Natasha Lyonne is in the new Fantastic Four. Yeah. Oh, I was definitely going to play the thing's girlfriend. That could be funny. That new Fantastic Four movie does look pretty good. I'm the most excited for that that I've been since... I don't know. I guess the Deadpool movie was the last Marvel thing anybody cared about. Hey, Captain America made a lot of moolah. Yeah, but nobody has anything good to say about it. It's like the Batman vs. Superman made a lot of money, but... Well, that was just... I mean, come on. By the way, everyone, I urge you all to check out our website, dumb-industries.com. Oh my god, this is... j-po predicts fantastic four will suck I think maybe that franchise is just like cursed it's kind of like the watchman it's like it's unadaptable as a movie I think you can don't even bother right now you can I think there's just too many it's it's too big a property like too many cooks get involved and it always just ends up falling flat Okay, so there's one of these guys up here, but I can't get up here. I feel like I'm going crazy. Okay, can I not just climb up this? Oh, Righteous Gemstones is coming back. I think it's going to be the final season. Okay. Watchmen TV show was good, Polaros. But that was like a sequel. It wasn't... Obviously inspired by the original book, but... Does its own thing. Was it better than Doomsday Clock, the DC comics? I never read that, but... I mean, I was against the concept of this TV show, but you start watching it. It's really, really well done. Yeah, I've only ever heard good things about that show. Doomsday Clock, on the other hand, is a ridiculous comic book where Superman fights Dr. Manhattan, and it's revealed that Dr. Manhattan is the reason that the New Fifty-Two happened, that awful, weird little period where everybody was younger and edgier and had hip new armor. That was all Dr. Manhattan's fault. so watchmen yeah there was there's also like a new animated version of the watchmen yeah in two parts the problem is like they also did like a few years ago like a motion comic where it's like literally just the panels like dave gibbons artwork but they animated it and that was pretty cool and then this cartoon looks like it just kind of redid that it's kind of the same thing again Well, you've got to squeeze as much money out of Watchmen as you can. There's also a new... It's one story. It's one story. They did... I would understand spin-offs. Did you ever read before Watchmen, the DC Comics event, where it was like backstories for all the... No, how was that? Was it any good? Some of them were okay. Yeah, the Minutemen one is drawn and written by the guy who did DC New Frontier, which is a really good story. Oh. No purple guys over here. Oh my god, this is a nightmare. Maybe I should just load up a different game file, just play... I literally don't know where the hell any of these things are, and I'm... Big rig says the cartoon is basically the comic and sell shaded three D animation. Yeah. That's what it looked like. But I thought the motion comic was pretty cool. Cause it still had like voice actors doing all the voices. I didn't want, I didn't ever see that motion comic, but, uh, there was a couple others around that time they were trying to make happen. They, uh, like I want to say Iron Man extremist was done as a motion comic. I think I may have seen that, uh, the astonishing X-Men run written by Joss Whedon, uh, How do I get out of... Joss Whedon, who wrote the first X-Men movie, or wrote, like, two lines in that movie. I was just reminded of that because J-Po says... you know, when you have a movie with a lot of characters, it's hard to tell a story in ninety minutes. X-Men made it work by basically skipping as much backstory as possible. I know, it's like that first X-Men movie, it's like a hundred minutes long, and they managed to make, like, a really fun, coherent X-Men movie. Basically, everybody has something to do. I mean, like, Storm kind of gets left out a little bit, and everybody's characters are pretty milquetoast, and... I'm curious if I have a game file that's a little further along. Do you always play as Lonk? Oh, that one's Link. Here, this one's kind of toward the end of the game, if you want to... Yeah, let's play that. Because in five minutes, we're going to pick the... I'm sorry, I literally have no memory of what's... Oh yeah, this is like the end of the end of the game. Where I'm definitely going to get my ass kicked a thousand times. Uh... Wait, do I have enough hearts? That's always a question with us. I need to check. Oh my god, we have another donation here. I'm so sorry. It came in about fifteen minutes ago. Who from? From Matt and Jackie B. Oh, thank you, Matt and Jackie. Welcome. Jackie says, Happy Monday, Dumb Bros. Thanks for everything, and this is the best way to start off the week. Oh, thanks so much. Especially after a nine-hour travel day yesterday. Though Matt is still enjoying vacation on the East Coast. Request? Surprise me. Okay. Thank you, Jackie. That is so cool. Oh, and in the amount of four dollars and twenty cents, which is one of our very default payments, payment amounts you can choose. Very, very hip. Okay. Let me think here. Very hip. I'm hip. I know the lingo. I get it. did you see did you see the doctor in me did you see did you see jackie b and me did you see um uh what's a good impression we could do for jackie uh uh, here is, uh, the, uh, Jackie's name and putting that song, uh, what's it called? Like Louie, Louie or whatever, where, you know, it's like, uh, but it's, it's, it's gonna be Randy Newman. So it's, uh, it's like Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Randy, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, Short people got, uh, Oh my God. Thank you, Matt and Jackie. I hope that that was trying to think or something. There's a bunch of impressions that we just don't do anymore. Cause we forgot about them trying to think. Yeah. I did a little Michael McDonald earlier. I think it'd been a hot minute since I did. I haven't, I've been trying to work on my Aaron Neville because I do love his, you know, like, uh, I can impersonate where my wife and I are watching the circle, the Netflix reality show, the circle. Yeah. I can do impressions of those people. I just don't think anyone would know what the hell I'm talking about, but I nail some of those, some of those people. I can also do Nick Lachey from, uh, some people might know Nick Lachey, right? Yeah. He was, he was married to Jessica Simpson at one point. Yeah. Nick Lachey. He's a cool guy, right? He's a cool guy. This is my Nick Lachey. Sup, guys? That's all he ever says. Every time he walks into a room, any show, he goes, Sup, guys? Alkanox, what is the circle? It's the greatest show ever made. Yeah, it's like they're talking like a mirror. They're isolated from each other and It's like ten people, they all live in apartments in the same building, but they don't actually ever come into contact with each other. All their communications through a social media app called The Circle, which is such bullshit. It's not actually, there's no way it's, it's not a social media platform. It's literally like they have someone typing everything. So it's like, it's all voice activated to make the show watchable. Cause you have all the people actually reading the comments, but it's a, here we go. Yeah, it's a weird show. Anyway, so yeah, they never see each other. But then, you know, if they get kicked off, they can go and visit someone. And, ooh, that someone may not be who they thought they were. They might be getting catfished. Oh, no. Anyway, the winner, the person who makes it, five people make it to the end. And then one person gets a hundred thousand dollars based on their rankings. We just finished season three. I watched some of that at some point in the past. Yeah, I don't remember anything else other than, like, yeah, that it was, yeah, the weird mirror thing. There's a guy named Joey Sasso in the first season. That's really all you need to know. Joey Sasso. There's one standout weirdo in every season of these shows. Yes. Oh, Danny. Yeah, Shuby. See, Danny watched the circle. Shuby. Shuby is like... He's just like the nicest guy you could ever meet, which makes it all the more... easy to just like talk like to hate on him like jen and I was like I fucking hate you but he's such a nice guy just like ah fucking hate him oh god how do I turn around uh I really should have played this last night and re-acclimated myself before doing oh nonsense anyway it's time for our poll Is it time for the nightly poll? Game over, man. Do you want to continue adventuring? Should I do it one more time? Nah. We've had enough of this. I promise I will play a little bit of this tonight. I've been playing a lot of Batman Arkham Knight, as you can see. I'm in Batman Find the Riddler mode. How far are you in that? I have ninety nine percent of that game basically. Arkham Knight. Yeah. I just have to find like forty more Riddler trophies and I have completely completed the entire game. I'm like at ninety nine of Arkham Knight and now I'm almost done with the story of Arkham City, but I'm nowhere. I didn't even start Arkham Knight yet. Anyway, these were our choices for tonight. I'll hit show results. What do you think it's going to be, Matt? We got TKO. I think it's going to be TKO. People really like that one. Rift Tracks, Quiplash, or Mario Kart. All blue shells. Let's see. TKO by two votes. All right. I'm awkwardly trying to relocate my keyboard. Fire this bad boy up. yeah so everybody goes to riff track or no not Jesus God jackbox.tv I think it's yeah but hold on I gotta um how do I do this oh yeah jackbox where are you there it is All right. This is going to be fun. Thank you so much for watching, everybody. Yeah, thanks for hanging out, everyone. Sorry, you're going to have to look at my face for a minute while I get this set up. Or you can look at Matt's face. There we go. Oh, no. Not that. Back to me. Matt. Matt or me. I got a cat. Got a cat here. All right, let's see. TKO. TKO. I'm trying to think of anything else interesting that's been going on. I kind of just laid around like a slug all weekend. I still have not heard back from McDonald's corporate as of yet. Oh, yeah. Did you file a formal complaint? I called them, but. Did you leave a message with management? I got a live person and everything. I don't I don't know what I was expecting to happen. I guess I just figured something would. But, you know. All right, Matt, I'm going to put the code in the chat for you. OK, so it's not. Chrome did some stupid update and now nothing works. God. Damn you, Chrome. OK. OK, hang on. Hang on, hang on tight. Uh, name down there. And, uh, did you put the code in the private chat? You said, Oh no, I did not. Sorry, Matt. Hold on. There you go. And I'm going to put the code in the chat for everyone as soon as Matt ends up there and you're in there. Now let's get this on screen and put the code in the chat. Everyone head to jackbox.tv and enter that code. Oh, wow. Wow, it always fills up so quickly. I love that. Wait, what's happening? Are they changing? Oh, they just you can tweak your your little guy in between. You can tweak your little guy. We all know how much I love a little guy. There we go. Been playing a lot of fall guys with Inga lately, and you get dressed up. You're dressing up. Your little guy is half the fun. It does absolutely nothing. It adds no benefit. And guys, if you didn't make it into the game, I think you could still be in the audience. Welcome to TKO. I am the tournament master. And just because I'm old doesn't mean I'm out of touch. Like those Budweiser frogs, right? Hilarious, huh? Becking you here to T-Shirt Island for one reason and one reason only. To engage in deadly t-shirt battle and maybe play some foosball with this guy. Okay, that's two reasons. One of the two. Let's, um... Maybe let's not draw any penises this time. Let's challenge ourselves. No pee-pees. No pee-pees. No wee-wees. Now every drawing is going to be gigantic. Those of you watching the tournament don't have to wait another hundred years to get in on the fun. Join the audience to submit suggestions and affect the game. Ugh, if that isn't a cry for help, I don't know what is. Uh, well... I've been listening to a lot. Over the weekend, I noticed they put all the Stone Temple Pilots and Tears for Tears catalog in Dolby Spatial Audio on Apple Music. That Tears for Tears stuff sounds great when it's all been remastered. I want to hear that. I don't care about Stone Temple Pilots. That's fine. Although, Stone Temple Pilots had some great songs, though. Big Bang Baby. Yeah, the album has, I think it's Tiny Songs. Yeah, Tiny Songs from the Vatican gift shop. That's something like that. That's a really good album. And they have sporadic good stuff in them. Did you watch the SNL's fiftieth anniversary thing? I'm so glad you asked. Yes. Do you have any thoughts? Opinions on it? I do, but I don't... We don't... This is a family show. That bad, huh? It's fine. Whatever. I love SNL as much as anyone. And... I have a lot of thoughts. Nothing is funnier than a good SNL sketch, right? Yeah. Nothing is more depressing than a bad SNL sketch. And there were some stinkers that night, I'll tell you. I don't know what's going on with me with some of these drawings. It's just what moved me in the moment. I'm trying to think if there's any other good comedian gossip that we've been talking about. We're both kind of obsessed with that video of that lady melting down. Is there anything else good like that going on right now? no um not that I know of people have a lot of thoughts on the snl special though gb and he liked the special eileen meno loves snl less than I do snl is good I mean everybody has their favorite kind of little eras and stuff and uh Well, that's the thing. It's like, the show, like, it's on... You can't doubt that they, you know, they find extremely talented actors and writers, but... It's also, like, it's a generational thing. Like, I love, you know, Chris Farley, Adam Sandler era. My dad can't stand that shit, you know? But he loves stuff in the two thousands. I don't know. I don't know, there's still good sketch comedy being made, but it just feels less and less like Saturday Night Live is so important for stuff like that when there's a thousand sketches off of I Think You Should Leave that I think are a thousand times better. Write something funnier, clever, or... Keep those slogans coming! Only seconds remain. Alright then. This game's gonna get really fun, everyone. Oh my god. I think my shirt's going to win. Oh, Scribbler Johnny says, I love Rachel Dratch, but I hate her Debbie Downer character. I thought that was one of the few really funny sketches on the fiftieth anniversary. Good. I hope you're ready. Let the tournament begin. All I know is that Paul McCartney played a set and he sounds so elderly now. Yeah. We are all orphans. I'm going to have to go with the scabies one. Just because orphans and stuff. Oh yeah, we are all orphans. There are quite a few moments of the SNL thing that were really funny. Kate McKinnon is in a sketch with Meryl Streep and that is hilarious. That was really funny. That was just total classic SNL. But then there were some real bombs. It was kind of depressing. All I know about that is that everybody who was there has got COVID now apparently. Oh really? And it's like every celebrity on the planet was there. Oh my god. Wow, what? That is stiff competition. I think I'm gonna give it to the Mr. Rogers one. That was pretty good. Oh my god. I might have to refresh the switch, because it's coming in a little weird. For the record, I drew the ghoul face on the left and I came up with the slogan on the right. So, uh, Oh, that's good now. Whoa. Oh my God. I love the drawing on that though. Holy is that a, is it wearing a thong? It looks that way. Yeah, that is a great. That's like what my skin looks like when I wear a swimsuit. Like, I just kind of am that white and I just blind everybody. It looks like the shirt on the right looks like something that a skateboarder in two thousand and five would have worn. I would have worn that. We were right down the middle. Interesting. Nice. Well done, Danny. Good job. Oh, yes. You guys are great. Now, is that implying that George Clooney is he's got like a gambling addiction? He can't stop playing blackjack. Is this like is this implying that inside George Clooney's head, it's like a being John Malkovich esque situation where there's people controlling him? Wow. Danny's killing him versus it's a pretty great combination. Macho man, Randy Newman. That's awesome. Love it. Have you watched any of that new Spider-Man cartoon yet? No. Should I? I watched one. It was alright. Because, you know, like, nothing groundbreaking. It's kind of like a neat alternate MCU. It's like it is the MCU, but it's not. It's kind of weird. I'll watch. Maybe I'll watch that with Dylan or something. As long as you don't think about it too much, you know. Wow. Wow. They're looking up. Yeah, they're looking up as if they're screaming to God himself. Why? Why not? Why no penises? Why no penises? That was basically the plot of that first Wonder Woman movie, wasn't it? Like the whole island she was from. They were just like, Mamma Mia, why a no penis? They were all Italian also. In Wonder Woman? Yeah. They were like, Mamma Mia, there's a no penis. You forgot to go with a Chris Pine. Oh, right. I won that one. Nice. Oh, the JFK shirt was dethroned. Fight each other. I love that drawing. It's so cute. It's definitely not a penis or anything. Oh, yeah. It is a penis, isn't it? God damn it. Well, you fooled me. Well, legal enough, it's a creature of some kind, I guess. I will say, if yours looks like that, please go to a doctor. Also, I made that drawing. Which one? Oh, the legal enough one. That's so great. Oh, here we go. Against Danny. Oh, I need a breather. Let's take a training break. It's training day. Drawing. My name is Simon, and I like to do drawings. Hmm. Do I have the color brown? Uh-oh. Matt, what are you doing? Oh my god. So stupid. I don't know. I don't even know. I don't even know. My other slogan didn't even make it out here. The other ones that I typed were Jar Jar Binks did nine eleven. And then I also tell you out of time is about to expire. Titties and beer. That was the other one that I wrote out. Write something. I think that's maybe the most deranged thing I've ever typed. Uh... That timer's not for decoration. Finish quickly! The second gauntlet is upon us, and the withered hand of Lady Luck has shuffled your drawings and slogans. Begin your new shirt design now. Uh, mine was perfect. The drawing, I think, was completely unrelated, but it matched up so perfectly with the slogan. It's like that classic editing test that they tell you about in film school where you cut from one thing and then do something unrelated. You can match them together. It's one of those. Gauntlet two. Oh, my God. incredible I really like the ninja turtle hold on who did that hey danny yeah I'm only getting two two art pieces as well but it could just be because there's so many of us playing yeah I think that has to do with it I love the idea that you get a colonoscopy by just someone putting on a giant condom. Just fucking in the ass. Colonoscopy. Well done, J-Po. you know what that one has my name in it I'm easy to please I'm going with that one but the other one also references this is true maybe that's how we'll get out into mainstream twitch better if we you know tag this with a you know hashtag colon health or something like that we'll get like all the colon non-profits to frequent our programming And maybe all these people commenting aren't commenting about me, they've just, the algorithm and their interest in colon and rectal health has brought them here. Yeah! That's, that's good. Those look like something I saw in my sleep after I took too many Benadryl one night. Danny says they do a very sexy video and she better get to be seen. I hope that as well. Oh, man, little little little little little. What is happening? Oh, yeah, it's it's it's weird. Oh, there it goes. It went dark. Now we're back. Now we're back. A new channel? It sure has some staying power. Oh, I love that little face. Big face, I should say. That's kind of what Tom Selleck looks like now, if you've ever seen what Tom Selleck looks like. His face has just kind of gotten bigger around his face. Do your parents still watch Blue Bloods? I don't know if that shows on anymore, but they weren't watching it until pretty recently. Yeah, and they always make fun of... Because, yeah, his head's getting giant, and he wears glasses a lot in that, and they look like when you put glasses on Mr. Potato Head, how they kind of, you know, don't fit correctly. A new challenger appears. Nice. Oh, there it is. Oh my god. Who did that drawing? It's so cool. I think that's Danny's. It's gotta be. Danny's so good with this. I bet you both of these are Danny's. Oops. Rude me, baby. Again, that kid on the left has my exact skin tone and complexion, just blindingly white. penguin's parents watch blue bloods till the bitter end yeah that show is the most complicated it's only made types of shows it's made for parents you have to be a parent to enjoy it Parents love those CBS-type dramas that are kind of like NCIS and The Law and Orders to a lesser extent. Oh, my God. It looks like Michael Fishman, the kid from Roseanne. Oh, I thought that was referencing Tom Arnold. That's where my brain went at first. Well, I was just reading the other day about how Michael Fishman... He hates Roseanne. He didn't side with her at all, so they hate each other. I think. That situation with that show is so weird. Is that still going? Yeah. The Connors? It's like in season six or something. That is nuts. All right. Yeah. Roseanne did nothing. Roseanne did nothing wrong in marrying Tom Arnold. You know what's a great movie with Tom Arnold? That's got to be another Danny drawing, right? I've Laid Semen. That's like the name of a cannibal corpse album. You would have a picture of like a corpse, like, you know. Just semen oozing out of it. Yeah. Or he'd be like, I don't know, just like, I'll cover it all. I don't know. Razor's Edge says, Hit and Run is a good movie with Tom Arnold. You know it's a good movie with Tom Arnold. True lies. I was just about to say that. Yeah, that movie rocks. That movie's so good. And I can't think of another good Tom Arnold movie. Well done, guys. Wait. So it's come to this, the final gauntlet. Only the strongest shirts from the previous round will compete. And only one will come out alive. Versus... A tower of... Are we voting on which is more revolting or which we'd rather wear? I think the one we'd rather wear is... Just, you know, overall best. Yeah. Yeah, what exactly is that creature on the right? It's like... It's like a little gnome. It's like an old gnome with giant testicles. Versace? why god why no penises salva adams these teas are all about fluids and excrement yep on brand we we did this I'm so sorry this is all this is all my fault Oh wow. Danny makes a good point. I like how the fifth person in the drawing is so concerned. The only one without a smile. They might be the only one that sees it coming. They're the only one who realizes that God does not hear their prayers or their cries for mercy. Oh, Danny. Winner. Wow. Winning design. I'm glad I could see you all compete in this tournament before I die. We should sell that in the store. I did that, Homer. Matt did the slogan. That's funny. We should sell that in the store. Yeah, that won't get us in trouble with Disney. In like three different ways. With the Groening estate, the Kennedy estate, or the Rogers estate. And the JFK estate. Yeah. Kennedy's will come after us, man. And the Rogers. That shirt will upset everyone. Maybe we should make that. Get us on the news. We'll see how far we can ride our First Amendment rights. It's all clearly satirical. Yeah, it's a terrific time for that. Well, the courts are in upheaval. Now's our time to be the, you know, what's the word I'm looking for? We can be like the standard setters in this new era of just, you know, whack bullshit. Anyway, I don't know what I'm saying anymore. Thanks for playing, everybody. This has been a great time. Always fun. Always a good time. We'll be back. I'm going to, tonight, figure out the controls to the Skyward Sword and try to remember where the fuck I was at a little bit better, and then we'll... We'll be picking up where you left off tonight, next week, APM Eastern, right here on Twitch. I really thought I could drop in on that better. I beat the entire game in between when we played the first time and then this time again, so I thought I'd be able to pick it up and go a bit better. It's all about the hang, Matt. We're all here just to hang. We did have a good hang. We did indeed have that, but... As a Zelda nerd, I will deliver some Zelda-ness. Oh, Master Torgo, resubscribe. Thirteen months in a row. Thank you, guys. Those are awesome. Who else here? Thank you so much, everybody. Thanks to Femsi Grimm and your Party of Five for rating us earlier. Yes, thank you, Party of Five. Thank you, Scott Wolf. Let's see. Scribbler Johnny, thank you. Subscribe for six months. You guys rule so hard. Tomorrow night, Mary Jo Peel Show right here on Twitch at APM Eastern. It's Ask Us Anything. Yeah. Mary Jo and I are going to go live, and we've already got some questions ready to go. We've got... We're going to be paying attention to the live chat. Hit us up on blue sky. Hit us up in discord. Yeah. Join the dumb discord server. The next movie, Joe Knight movie is going to be all that good stuff. Oh yeah. We've got polls. Everyone. Jay Poe. Can I ask I anything? I guess I could. Um, what was I going to put in the chat here? Okay. uh yeah let's uh who should we raid oh dumb weird is live okay okay and over here I think I'm gonna turn on if you uh did not catch dr strange the other night uh I will be replaying that so dr strange so by the time the pre-show kicks off for you know ends for that it should be around the time it was wrapping up so you can come here after and catch the movie so We should always end with this music. It's very triumphant. I still think we need to end with the SNL saxophone fanfare. Oh, let's do that for Mystery Hour. All right, everyone. See you next week. Night, everyone.

It’s Monday and Matt is studying for his bar exam or something, so Chris takes it upon himself to host the very first-ever SOLO edition of Super Dumb Bros. (aka Super Dumb Bro)! For the third week in a row, Chris plays Grand Theft Auto III and gets murdered slightly less than usual. Then, Chris hosts a fun round of RiffTrax: The Game with viewers!

It’s another Monday which means only one thing: The Super Dumb Bros. are here to make the day suck less! Matt & Chris revisit Liberty City the second week in a row to watch Chris actually complete a few missions! Then it’s back to another hilarious round of Tee K.O. that proves members of the Dumb community are mostly deviants, just the way we like it.

Matt & Chris are back with an all-new Super Dumb Bros. as Chris plays the legendary open world game GRAND THEFT AUTO III and gets brutally murdered at least several times throughout the night. Then the two dudes play the Jackbox game Tee K.O., which predictably involves butts and 9/11. Come back next week for PART TWO of our Grand Theft Auto III run!

Transcript:

It isn't too early to be thinking about something spectacular for holiday eating. And cranberry crimson mold could be it. It's colorful, good, and you can make it ahead of time. We started by dissolving two packages of strawberry-flavored gelatin in a cup and a half of boiling water. And now we're adding the gelatin, gradually, to a cup of Miracle Whip salad dressing. Ah, that's where the creamy look and the teasing flavor come from. After the mixture has chilled till it's slightly thickened, fold in a ten-ounce package of cranberry relish and a cup and a half of applesauce. It's a marvelous combination of flavors, and the lively, teasing taste of Miracle Whip is perfect for it. Just before serving, unmold it, then we're going to top it off with more Miracle Whip and watercress. With holiday time coming up and lots of sandwiches and salads to be made, better get a couple of jars of uncopyable Miracle Whip from Kraft. Los Angeles, start your VCRs. Stay with more energy. All of a sudden I'm thirsty. So I go to the refrigerator. I just know how it's going to taste. And I take that awesome first long drink. And it hits me right there. I thought it was fabulous. The show was incredible. I loved it. I thought it was way much better than Power Rangers Live. Mortal Kombat, live on stage. The best family show of the season writes USA Today. See illusions, gymnastics, lasers, stumps, and more. I'm so excited. The show's great. It was great, man. The New York Times calls it an action fantasy spectacle. Prepare yourself for Mortal Kombat, live on stage. It's coming for one performance only. February, February, February. February, February. After the professor changed our powers to the motorcycle, our life became more fun. Say, Pop. The elephant came out on my motorcycle again. But you're still too young to ride a motorcycle. But I use a helmet. Wait. Tornado, come now. We need you. I thought you wouldn't call me Tornado. Wait! What a shame, Boba Fett! With only R&D R&D R&D per month, you can get your Pop Zero Km! What do you mean? Let's go to Meari! Come, you too, to Meari Malls! What do you call the new Water and Ooze Blaster Oozenator? Oh, yuck! Bruh! Ew! Disgusting! And of course... Awesome! The new Oozenator Blaster from Super Soaker. Major pumping required. Refills sold separately. When delicious peanutty cream comes together with a crunchy candy shell, what you got is Reese's Pieces, one great tasting candy. In a crazy world where things don't always fit, it's great to know there are some that do. Reese's Pieces, the winning combination. Oh, I'm leaving. This wicked itch is killing me. You've got the wicked itch. But I've got Lanocaine. Lanocaine! Lanocaine cream kills the wicked itch fast, with itch killer plus pain killer. No hydrocortisone like Cort-Aid has that. Sunburn, dry skin, poison ivy, insect bites. Lanocaine kills all your wicked itches. Lanocaine! Lanocaine does kill the wicked itch. These are the two sides of the same problem. When you drink too much alcohol, El alcohol te toma a vos. Citea. Sistema Teleeducativo Argentino. Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. Gruanza. Amitofo. Merry Christmas from Burn Fonk Insurance! Have you ever wanted someone to take care of? Someone who needs lots of cuddling and affection? Someone you can give your love to? Well, that someone is Little Miss No-Name. She's the doll who needs more loving care than any doll you've ever had. Look, she has a tear on her cheek. Little Miss No Name is sad because she doesn't have a pretty dress. She doesn't have any shoes. She doesn't even have a name. But she does have big brown eyes. Most of all, Little Miss No Name has a heart filled with love. Give her a kiss and hold her close. Take your comb and make her hair look pretty. Little Miss No Name needs a home and all the love you can give her. You'll find Little Miss No Name standing in a snowstorm box at your toy store. Take her home with you today. Little Miss No Name. I drank a lot of water. I really have to go. People are waiting to tee off. There's no restroom out here. Has this happened to you? I've got the perfect gift. Introducing the Euro Club, the discreet sanitary solution for your urgent relief. It looks like an ordinary golf club, but contains a reservoir built into the grip to relieve yourself. The Euro Club comes with a towel and appears that you are just checking out your club. Leak proof, easy to clean, and no embarrassing moments. Order now. The Euro Club, the only club in your bag guaranteed to keep you out of the woods. At Carl's Super IGA, we're committed to making your shopping experience an enjoyable one. Our tasty service deli offers you the freshest deli meats and cheeses. Try Carl's chicken, roasted to juicy perfection. Or our delicious deli pizza, made in the store to guarantee you freshness. We care at Carl's Super IGA. Opened twenty-four hours, seven days a week. Shop Carl's Super IGA. The happy store. What is it about Smith's crinkle cut potato crisps that make them so irresistible to gobbledogs? The taste. The delicious, tantalizing, real potato taste. Smith's crinkle cut. The only chippies with real potato taste. Ask any gobbledog. Baby's so real I can tell by your face just how you feel Can I hold her? Baby's so real I can tell by your face just how you feel I think she needs her mommy Mommy knows best I love you I can tell by your face just how you feel Baby's so real Baby's so real Hello. Oh, hello, Ada. Hello, Dolly. Oh, I've been on my feet all morning. Make us a cup of PG, love. Your favourite. Oh, me back's killing me ironing my Phil's golf shirts. Still at it, is he? Yeah, he likes to play around. Or two. Here, Dolly, can you smell something burning? Yeah, it's me. I've just scored a hole in one. There's no other tea to beat PG. It's the taste. La, la, la, la, la. La, la, la, la, la. La, la, la, la, la. That's what I like the most about it. According to legend, little folks know, Hills is where the toys are. Hills Toy Layaway. Just come to come down, a small service cart lays away toys, little and large. Hundreds of toys, express layaway too. So layaway is even easier for you. Remember, Hills Toy Layaway. One reason they're different, and why they say, Hills is where the toys are. At low prices, every day. The Lakers are looking for a big man. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday comes again. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday comes again. Just squeeze. Just squeeze, just squeeze. Please, please, please. Just squeeze, just squeeze, just squeeze. Just squeeze, just squeeze. Please, please, please. Just squeeze. New Just Squeezed. Squeezed every day for a taste as fresh as you can get. Oh, nice pear. It's orange. This has been a nice time for me. This year I have made fifty-five years teaching in this town. And for the students on this show tonight, go to the First United Methodist Church. That includes me. I'm with Frisch and I Methodist Church. Reverend Jones, Bill Jones, opened our show last time, and he's not here tonight. So John Dacre's here, Bob Spencer, Michelle Casey, and I all go to Frisch and I Methodist Church. So John is going to sing a song that's very popular nowadays, and it's Christ the Lord is Risen Today, and he's going to do a mora too, okay? My name is John Dacre. The Lord is risen today, hallelujah Sons of men and angels say, hallelujah To your voice and triumphs, hallelujah To your voice and triumphs When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a moray. It's a moray Bells will ring, ting-a-ling-ling, ting-a-ling-ling And the bell will ring, moray It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a moray It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a moray Mmm, you shine so, mmm, that you're in love, and you know that you feel so amore to me, but you see back in old Napoli, that's amore. Ho, ho, home invasion. It's the Mendez brothers. The Winklevoss twins. Santa stole the idea of Facebook from them. These two seem to know that Santa's in the living room. Look out, Santa. They'll see you. I mean, how can they miss him? They'll see him through the door. Why, of course, Santa can handle this. All he has to do is use the magic dreaming powders prepared by Mr. Merlin. Stripper glitter. And it isn't long before our two little stay-a-plates are sleeping soundly... Hey, that hurt. By the way... Meanwhile, Pitch can't escape the funny oboe music. Oh won't you come and join us? Oh won't you come and join us? That was weird. I'll tell the world. Go ahead. That was weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. Oh no, Emperor Palpatine's here to see him now. The fate of the future. Am I right? You and your rebel friends are about to... I am here to teach you the meaning of Christmas. What is this place? Your lightsaber. Why am I here? It's dark and... I think you and your friends will find solstice fully operational. Is this mine? I think... His name is Jesus Cleese. Jesus Cleese. When you guys choose the paintings, they always seem to fit. We're coming into some difficult times, I think, and I'd like to thank the... The guy in office right now just pissed off a whole lot of people. To me, I don't know, it just kind of feels a little bit empowering in a time when I don't feel like I have much control over much of anything at the moment. So I have control over this. I can do this. You know, that's... That's funny you said that, because when I was painting her the first time, I was thinking the same thing. She looked kind of queenly. Majestic, you know? I have found this, though, and this might be useful to you as you start the new year. I have found that six or seven donuts first thing in the morning really curbs my appetite. Well, until breakfast, of course. I tease. I tease donuts. But did you know that scientific studies have found that sugar as an addiction is worse than heroin. Yes, worse than heroin. So I'm going to transition to heroin and then ease off that. I tease heroin. If I were a gorilla, la la la la la I'd eat me a banana, na na na na na I'd live in a treehouse and swing on a vine But one thing is sure, I would love ya Ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya And if I were a tuba, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba All I'd do is hum pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa I would take a big breath and I would march in a band But one thing is sure, I would love ya Ya-ya-ya-ya, ya-ya-ya-ya what's up what's up what's up hey everybody Welcome, everyone. Hi. Hey, hey, hey. Hi. Hi, everybody. Hello. Welcome. Hello, computer. Hello. Hello. Okay, computer. Computer. Happier. Welcome everyone to Super Dumb Brothers, the retro gaming live stream from Dumb Industries. I'm Chris Gersbeck. I'm Matt. That's Matt over there. I'm Matt. Tonight, we're going to be playing some Grand Theft Auto III, which we've never done on this stream before. I'm Matt. uh yes we're gonna be playing grand theft auto three that is ai tonight just experimenting seeing maybe it might be you know cost effective way to take take a night off you know just let uh I'm just gonna be strung together from existing clips from other shows it's gonna be like uh remember when they fired the guy that played chef on south park and then they had just two episodes where they just strung together like other clips of him from other shows and that was amazing I think he was pretty upset about that too. Yeah, it was one of those things where it's like because they made fun of Scientology and then everyone thought that he got mad and quit, but then it turned out that Scientology quit the show for him or something. Right, it was something weird like that. It was something weird. Anyway. But yeah, tonight... Grand Theft Auto III, man, I played this game in college so much. It's kind of unbelievable. I wish I had a record to see how many hours I actually put into Grand Theft Auto III. I don't really remember. I never was a big Grand Theft Auto person. Growing up, we were very kind of just like Sega, Nintendo kind of people. We never really did the... I had a first-generation Xbox, which I had a handful of games for, but... after that I kind of was playing in terrible punk bands and you know and getting like setting off fireworks and like you know back alleys and weird crap like that engaging in illegal cockfighting rolling dice so I didn't have much time for video gaming so I'm very curious to watch this Ultra Deadhead asked, did I get all the hidden packages? No, I don't think I ever went around and got all the hidden packages. I've got a hidden package for you. Oh, Matt, this is a family program. No, actually, when I selected that we were playing Grand Theft Auto III, I had to add that it's a mature game on Twitch. Required. So you've got to be a certain age to watch this. We're checking IDs at the door. Yes, everyone. Make sure to have your ID or your passport ready before you watch this stream. Step through the metal detector. Before we get too far, too, I just want to say I ran out to grab some drinks before the stream like I usually do and on a chair outside my apartment. I'm reckoning they're giving this away. In New York, you just find weird shit by the side of the road sometimes and people are giving it away. I found this. What is that? Hold on, I'm going to full screen you so I can get a better look at this. It's like a weird Aztec Medusa head thing. If I die mysteriously after tonight's stream, blame it on this. It kind of looks like the mask from The Mask. It does, yeah. The one that Mystery Science Theater did, not the Jim Carrey one. Oh, I was thinking the Jim Carrey one. Oh, I guess it does look like that too. I thought you were talking about the older The Mask that... But yeah, look at how just freaky this thing is. It is pretty freaky. It's giving me like a remember on the Brady Bunch when they found that like tiki necklace and then a bunch of bad stuff started happening to all of them. I'm afraid that it's going to be a situation like that. Yes. So if I ever get to where I'm emotionally overwhelmed during tonight's show, I'm just going to put this over my face so you can't see how overwhelmed I am. I love it my sunglasses on top again matt is being portrayed by ai tonight trying this out uh yeah it works you know we'll be able to do live streams even if matt is uh on the road or in jail whatever having a medical emergency you know which is becoming more and more these days unfortunately uh no it's uh yeah I don't know don't know yeah and also yeah we're playing grand theft auto and I don't know if you can tell from uh the uh the lax tone I'm setting tonight but we're uh this is just kind of our hangout stream so we just hang out there's no real itinerary uh you know no real agenda of topics we're looking to address we're just chillaxing hanging out uh so if y'all got things you want to talk about uh type in the chat uh and we're also doing our live shout outs like we always do so uh We are, and we've already... And also, yeah, just to remind folks, I just want to remind folks, you can watch tonight's program completely ad-free. Get rid of those Twitch ads just by heading to our website, dumb-industries.com slash superdumbbros. You can kick in two bucks a month, get access to the whole back catalog, of which there is a lot of content on there. And we've already gotten a couple donations here, so... Let's do it. Thank you so much, guys. First donation here comes from Penguins. Penguins. Thank you. Thanks, bud. Penguins is a huge supporter of ours. We appreciate them. Penguins. Penguins. And also, yeah, when you send in a donation, you can put in a little note in there for us. You can ask us a question. You can write a little comment. You can... Challenge us to do one of our patented terrible impressions. Or if you leave it blank, we'll just give you something out of our own twisted minds, which is appealing to some people. Well, Penguins has a great request here. Penguins says, if Randy Newman can sing the chorus of Hot Blooded by Foreigner. I can definitely do that. I mean, the course is pretty short, so let me... Yes. I'm going to Google some lyrics just so I... Lyrics. Here are my clickety-clackety mechanical keyboard. So, yeah. Well, I'm hot-blooded, you check it and see. Randy's got a fever, a hundred and three. Come on, Penguins, you can do morning dance because I'm hot-blooded. I'm hot-blooded. Penguins don't have to read my mind to know what Randy has in mind. Penguins, you ought to know. Ba-doo, ba-doo. Thank you, Penguins. Thank you so much, Penguins. We got another one here. It's for Emmy, but it's from our good friend Mandog. Oh, thanks, Mandog. Thank you, Mandog. Is there anything that we can do? No. Mandog is a big contributor. I feel bad just to... I know, I know. Just leaving him hanging like that. Let's not leave him hanging. Is he watching? Is Mandog in the chat? Do we have a Mandog in the chat? Um... I'll leave you, since it's just anything, here's a little brief. We've been talking about Batman in the Discord. I have, against my better judgment, decided to become more active in the Discord. Against my better judgment. We were discussing Batman, so here's Randy Newman singing the Batman theme, incorporating Mandog's name. Do do do do do do do do ba do ba do ba do ba man dog. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do man dog. Do ba do do do do do Randy do da do da do da man dog. Man dog. Thank you, man dog. Okay. Thank you, Mandog. Mandog is watching. Pink Batman. Yeah, we discussed Pink Batman. We discussed how Batman wears a variety of weird costumes in the fifties, including a pink one and a zebra stripe one. all right we got a couple more here I'm going to start the game now I've been playing this past few weeks sporadically so yeah so we're not starting straight from the beginning no I think I'm about on this I'm a little more than halfway through the story okay I think so what is the basic story I'm not a big grand theft auto person I played the one that was all about russian people who call each other cousin that was grand theft auto force I know I know that one so what's this one So now Grand Theft Auto III starts. You're a nameless character. You never even speak. You're just some guy with a leather jacket. And the game starts. You're being taken to prison, and then someone busts you out of prison. You and this guy, I believe his name is Eightball. He... I wonder what he does yeah he he's all you know he's also going to prison with you but you both escape and then he you take he takes you down to uh liberty city which is new york he's basically just new york city uh they and he gets you set up with the mafia okay italian mafia so that's like kind of how it starts so this is like scarface kind of it's like a rags to riches exactly moving up through organized crime it's basically just Scarface. Now, I've already pissed off the Italian Mafia, the Yakuza, the drug Mexican, or the Colombian drug cartel. So they're all trying to kill me now. The Shriners, the Masons, the Jehovah's Witnesses. Let me get our bed music turned off. Yeah, get that down, and I gotta get my cat off my desk. And I will be, since Chris is playing this, I will be manning the chat tonight, so... If you got something to say, you gotta say it to me. Gotta turn this up a little bit. Is that better? It's a little better, yeah. I'm trying to think of who that guy reminds me of. So there's a lot of celebrity voices in this game. I believe Ray Liotta is. He may be in the second one, the Vice City one. I know in one of them Axl Rose plays the DJ. I can't remember which one. Oh, look at that running action. That's... Just get in anybody's car. No, this is my car. Oh, yeah, that is your car. Alright. So now playing this on switch, the downside of playing it on switch, I played this on PS two back in the day. Uh, but switch doesn't have like analog, uh, triggers. Okay. And you used to be able to control the cars a lot easier by just like putting a little bit of gas on the gotcha on there, but it just like, you're either hitting the gas or yeah. And the steering isn't as fluid. Yeah, because you have to steer with the Fisher-Price toys that are the Switch controller. I'm sending one of my controllers in. Oh, nice. I need to do that with some of mine. I always just didn't have the patience, and I would just buy new Joy-Cons, so I have... It's incredibly easy. You just have to go online, start a case, and mail it in. I've got, like, five working left Joy-Cons, and then, like, one working right Joy-Con. So I gotta get one of these drug cartel bands. He runs like I do. Did you just throw Crocodile Dundee out of that? I sure did. All right, now I got to get to the airport. Morbo says, a lot of swaying back and forth during conversations. Yeah, the way that they animated those, like, old three characters, it was like they all make it look like he's alive. So he's just kind of, they're like a nineteen thirties cartoon. However, nineteen thirties cartoon is like, you know, always bouncing up and down kind of. I also like the cars just kind of bounce off each other like... like they're all made of rubber. Yeah. This is like playing Arkham City for the Switch with the Batmobile. It's about the same level of graphics and everything. Basically. That's what I've been playing a lot lately. This is actually remastered. I mean, the original graphics, well, first of all, it was in four three. So they made a widescreen and then they touched up the graphics a little bit too. Okay. It's not a huge upgrade. I was going to say, like, how improved is this over the PS two version being as it's on Switch? It's pretty upgraded. Okay. It definitely looks better than I remember it playing. Okay. Now, I think I just have to take out this yacht. Yeah, I have been playing Arkham City like a motherfucker lately. Oh, God. Oh, I failed. Damn it. You failed by just getting out of the car? They saw me. Oh. All right, let's try this again. See, like, the few times I did play these games, I never actually did the missions. I always just fucked around and just, like, you know, got in trouble. I mean, if I can't beat, you know, a mission tonight, that's pretty much what I'm going to do. We're just going to fuck around. I am cool with that. I'm just going to drive around. Now, I never played a lot of Grand Theft Auto, but I did play Simpsons Hit and Run, which is like, what if Grand Theft Auto was The Simpsons? And that's a wonderful game. Yeah, I never played that, but I've heard good things. Oh, so good. One of these days, I'm going to have to bring my GameCube up from South Carolina, where I have the GameCube, just for that. This is the other annoying thing about the Switch version is... Well, I think it's just the game in general. Something they improved in later entries is, like, if you fail a mission, you have to start all the way from, like, where you last began. So in later entries, if you fail the mission, you just go, like, right back to the beginning of the mission. I wouldn't have to do all this driving to get a new car. Like, the auto saves a little better and all that kind of stuff. Yeah. But I mean, this game was like pretty ahead of its time. Yeah. Oh, I remember when it came out because I my because like I never had like got into the PlayStation stuff. My cousin did. So I definitely played like the first two Grand Theft Auto was a fair bit. The top down ones. Oh, those were interesting. Yeah, those are kind of silly. So this I remember when it came out, it was like, oh, this is the future of gaming. Like, holy shit. Fuck you, Crocodile Dundee. Yeah, so now this is a Colombian cartel car. This is what the Colombian cartel drives. It's like a Jeep Wrangler. So the soundtrack is just all Scarface, basically. I was about to start singing this song earlier. You know. everyone's shooting at me I've pissed off everyone so if I get into any gang territory they just start firing guns at me this is basically what it feels like to be Eric Adams right now you just go around New York and just everybody hates you and they all want you dead oh I forgot to say we got a couple more shoutouts here oh okay next one comes from our good friend Morbo thank you Morbo thanks bud Morbo says, keeping in the spirit of tonight, Gollum sings, get out of my dreams, into my car. That's a good one. Oh, I could totally do that. Here, let me do that. I know the chorus to all of these, but I'm trying to... But the chorus to that one's pretty short, as I recall. So, here we go. All right, so... Get out of my dreams. Get into my car, Morbo. Get out of my dreams. Get in the backseat, Morbo. Get into my car. Yeah. Lady driver walking down the road. Who's that lady? I'll be the one shine on you. Thank you, Morbo. While you're at the screen, what's the next one? I need to open the square thing. I've got... Yeah, you really do, Matt. No, I'm just joking. I haven't shown you how to do that yet. Okay. Next one comes from Matt and Jackie B. Matt and Jackie, thank you. You guys are the best. Check out Jackie's Etsy shop. She's got some custom dumb merch on there you can only get. Yeah. Our only official third-party licensor. okay so let me just pause a second read this uh matt could gollum tell me where to find the video from the bumper where the lady is playing the piano and people are trying to sing my google foo is failing love you guys which one was that I was I was retrieving drinks during this was um a video from the bar the lady's playing the piano I don't know, because I put on the pre-show, and then I just ran and ate dinner real quick. Yeah, we've been using older pre-shows for this. Let me... Give me some more context in the chat, because it's not the lady at the piano. It wasn't the My Name is John Dacre one, was it? I'm trying to think of what we're thinking of, preciouses. Oh, it's the church one, so that's... Is it the guy singing Matsumura really badly? Or the Go Tell It On The Mountain one? Okay, yeah, so I believe people were saying this, it was the John Decker one. Okay, so if you go on YouTube, Preciouses, and type in my name is John Decker, that's D-O-K-E-R, that video will come up. So, uh, so precious is a jacket. I hope that that's helpful because yeah, he'll slings, he'll slings. That's a big pizza pile. That's some more. He doesn't remember the words. You're in love. yeah yeah that one's uh my name is john dacre that's a great I've I've known that about that video for a while back when I was still uh doing a youth group praise band which takes me back a while we used to play that video and pre-shows for that before service started so uh so that weird video predates uh my abandonment of religion so I had to eject the cat from the dumb industry studios. You're in love. I hope that I answered your question and that was sufficient for your donation. Thank you so much, Matt and Jackie. We love you. I feel like we're in Run Lola Run now with this music playing. You can change the stations. Flashback's my favorite because it's all the Scarface. Yeah. Someone needs to make a Run Lola Run video game where you're just a lady with red hair just running. That movie's amazing. I haven't seen it. That is a great movie. Yeah. You know what video game had a lot of great music I've been thinking about lately? The Tony Hawk video games. Oh, yeah. I mean, that introduced a lot of music, basically. Yeah, no, I mean, that's, like, a lot of people. Wasn't Dave Hill telling us about that, that, like... Tony Hawk never really made any money until the Tony Hawk video games came out, and then, like, that's where he made all this money. Pretty much, yeah. Like, I mean, like, I think he was doing all right, but, yeah, that's when he became, like, you know... I think he's even been on podcasts saying that he went to a meeting with the game developers and they slid him a check for the most money he's ever seen in his life across the table during that dinner. I wish something like that would happen to me. I know. Maybe someone will make a dumb industries video game based on our lives. in careers just me and my messy apartment just having anxiety attacks while trying to put together three shows you've got to put together this pre-show for tonight but you're having an anxiety attack over something weird going on with your teeth can you put off demons inside to get your work done Matt if anyone has any advice on how to beat this mission I'll take it What I also remember about the Tony Hawk video games is after they came out, everybody and their uncle who was like an extreme kind of sports person tried to make a video game and none of them were really, really owned up to it, to the Tony Hawk games. Yeah, what exactly are you doing? I'm supposed to kill this dude, but like... So the guy with the arrow over him, you gotta kill him, but you can't do that until you get out of the car, right? Or can you just run him over? Well, I can just like run him over, but when I did that last time, they blew my car up and I just died immediately. Can you not just get out and just like sneak up on him? Can you like pull a Batman and just kind of like, you know? I don't think so. So you know what, he's shooting at me, aren't you? Just ram him! Ram him! Yeah! Oh, but I can't get out of the car. That's the problem. Okay, so just run him over and then... And then keep driving. And then just keep going. Pull a... What was it? Did Halle Berry do that? Didn't she have, like, a weird hit-and-run thing? Halle Berry. I know, uh... Brandy did. Okay, we'll pull a Brandy, then. We'll just do that. Uh... Pull a Matthew Broderick. Oh, that's... Yeah, nobody really talks about that. He is... Well, he's famously clever. I imagine he's walked out of... Oh, sorry, lady. I imagine he's walked out of several interviews because they asked him about this. He's like, okay, I'm out of here. Remember that time you killed a lady? Okay. There we go. It's like that. I've talked about this before in another stream that that Norm Macdonald interview where he brings up how Tim Allen went to prison during the interview. And it's the only time I've ever seen that address the interview because Norm's like, so you've been to prison before, right? And Tim Allen's just like, thanks for bringing that up. And you got any advice for people if they go to prison? Give me your car, buddy. Oh no. Did he just call you a gringo poppy? Is he a Brendan Schaub fan? fucking raven I'm not even trying to run people over it just happens that's part of the fun of those games you just randomly run people over I like when you almost hit that lady a bit ago you then apologize to the imaginary lady on your you're like oh sorry lady I'm like you're such a nice guy chris apologizing to computer generated ladies hey what if what if ai has feelings we don't know yet All right, so my strategy here is I'm just going to run this dude over there. Is that Gaff at Kodo? Okay, I see what I can do. Okay, checking out the chat. Dan Wally says Laura Bush killed another driver. Yeah, oh yeah, I remember that. Yeah, get him, get him, ram him. Oh! I was so close. You're on the right track. Yeah. Maybe you have to just hit that one guy and then just whip around and then hit all the other people maybe, and that'll keep them from blowing you up. But they blow it up immediately. But you're trying to drive away from them, so maybe if you just whip around immediately and go at them. I love that we're strategizing how to kill a large group of people. If anybody in the chat has any strategy for how to murder a large group of people without exiting an automobile, please sound off. Why did I get a star for getting in my own car? I am curious. Mom says The Simpsons did an amazing Tim Allen prison joke. I don't remember that one. I wouldn't put it past him. Mitchell says Randy Newman hit and run. I don't know. Caitlyn Jenner did kill someone with her car. Oh, yeah. Rebecca Jayhart. Danny says, and yet Matthew Broderick's greatest crime was marrying Sarah Jessica Parker. I don't know about that. I'd say his greatest crime was being in... I don't know, that musical of the producers? I never really dug that. Inspector Gadget? Oh, Inspector Gadget. Good call. Yeah, that sucks. Oh, and the Godzilla... Oh, yeah. Oh, wait. I pipped the wrong car. You're in the mystery mission. Matt, why did you stop? Oh, that guy's dead. Good. Yeah, that American Godzilla was real bad. Inspector Gadget, that was another movie where I remember the marketing for it was everywhere, and I was so excited for it as a kid, and then it was just shit. That was like the beginning of people not getting too hyped up about summer movies anymore. Yeah. Because that one sucked. And then the next year, I think the episode one came out. Oh, yeah, all around the same time. Somewhere in my parents' house, I have McDonald's at the time. McDonald's used to have great Happy Meal toys, and they had all the body parts to Inspector Gadget that did different things. Like, you could get the leg, and it was like a water gun, and his arm was one of those extendable grabber things. And when you put them all together, it made like a Voltron of a Matthew Broderick Inspector Gadget, and I have the whole Inspector Gadget somewhere in my parents' house. I need to find that before they move away. All right, let's see. There used to be so many good Happy Meal toys. McDonald's Happy Meal toys suck now. I went with my nieces to McDonald's when I was back home, and they had Sonic and Knuckles toys, and it was like some shit you would get out of a Cracker Jack box. It's impossible. Someone has played this game a million times. Tell me how to do it. Do you want me to get on and try to find a walkthrough? Oh, someone's saying, Chris, shoot from your window on the opposite side. Oh. See, that's what I was saying. I didn't know that you could shoot inside the car. I think I've got to stop at the gun store. There's no gun hold laws in Liberty City. Oh, no. You can walk around with a rocket launcher. Oh, yeah. Wise Twin Sailor says the Looney Tunes toys had DC superhero costumes. I have the Taz with the Flash costume somewhere in my parents' house, too. That's a good call. Inga got me a while back for Christmas, or maybe it was around Halloween, I don't remember exactly, but she found on eBay all of the McDonald's gangs with the little Snap-on costumes that went with them, like the Ronald McDonald with the Snap-on Frankenstein costume, and Grimace with the Snap-on Ghost costume, and Birdie has like a pumpkin costume, and it all comes in the, and it came with the Happy Meal box from that time too, so it was, I guess that was Halloween when she got me that. Because I always think of when I think of Happy Meal Halloween toys, I think of those Nuggets with the costumes, which are great. And I also have all those in my parents' house somewhere. But the McDonald's gang with the costumes are kind of a... They're lesser known, but they're very cool. So many great Happy Meal toys. It's not cool, I guess, to market to children overly with your... with your greasy hamburgers and stuff anymore, but... Those were good times, though. Those were good times, yeah. Burger King used to be great, too. Burger King has fallen off the hardest of any of the fast food restaurants. Like, every Burger King now has, like, the vibe of, like, a rest stop gas station. It's like... I remember when I was a kid, like, I remember the Wild Wild West movie with Will Smith had, like, sunglasses you could buy from Burger King, and they were nice-ish sunglasses for coming from Burger King, and they looked like Jim West sunglasses. Good times. Especially corn. What's the story with that anyway? Gladlo, I'm deadly serious now. Uh, checking out the chat. He's got a cake knife, so those nuggets fucked. Yeah, those McDonald's nuggets were great. Someone needs to, like, make an Etsy store where they just make new clothes for those nuggets that you can just buy and then dress them up in different things. Though all the nuggets were slightly different shapes, so they didn't... The costumes weren't, like, one-to-one interchangeable, but... But yeah, I had a ghost nugget and one with a spider costume. That was pretty cool. There's a cowboy one. All sorts of nuggets. Master Torgo says, Popeyes is delicious. Actually, good food. Chicken is amazing. I like the Popeyes chicken sandwich a fair amount. I have to stop eating there, though, because there for a while, I was going through a phase where I just... You know, I'd be, like, working and doing stuff for these during the day, and I'd do the stream that I wouldn't get around, like, going out to eat till late, and then the Popeyes was the only thing that was open super late in my neighborhood, so I was just eating, like... a whole ass chicken sandwich and like a giant thing of mashed potatoes at like midnight one in the morning and then just having like the worst diarrhea of my life so I uh I haven't eaten at Popeyes in a second that's a meat problem though that's not a good problem I'm a thirty four year old man I shouldn't be shoving fried chicken into my face at twelve thirty at night and then laying down to go to sleep and then I wonder why I have all these digestive problems and I'm needing to go see a GI doctor and stuff now did you do it? I think I did it. Now what do I have to do? Necklace driving unlocked. But it doesn't say you completed the mission. Oh, no. Now dump the car. Okay. Gotta dump the car. Danny says, that's a shame. Popeyes is very pro-Sandal. Yeah, Popeyes has never given me shit. What I love about Popeyes is... And there's a lot of restaurants in this neighborhood that I just get on a jag and I go to a bunch. And some of them make you feel self-conscious that you've been there, you know, like three times in one week. And the Popeyes never does. And they're always very quick... I remember there for a while I was on a jag when I lived in sunset park where I was going to kfc a bunch and there were like these jamaican ladies that were behind the counter and the last time I went there like I walked in the door and I just heard from the back like he's here again and that was the first time I went there amazing he's back I literally just yeah like in that jamaican voice like he's here again and I was like oh god So now you can't do it in this game. In Vice City, they added the option where you can jump out of a moving car. Where you just kind of roll on the ground and your car plows into something? Yeah. Now where do I take this to dump it? Dump it. Or should I just blow it up somewhere? Alkanoc says maybe they were just glad to see you. No, it was definitely with the vibe of like they couldn't believe that this white boy was eating KFC for like the third time this week. Wait, what did they say? He's back again! That is so funny. KFC has really fallen off. That used to be a great time. You know what? I'm not eating any of that crap anymore. I've been vegetarian the past two weeks. really how's that going pretty good pretty good I haven't been eating red meat a whole lot I've managed to give that up but I love chicken so much that's a that's a hard one I do too but every now and then you ever have like and this is usually my own cooking do you ever like chicken and it's just kind of like gross it's not very good I don't know the texture annoys me sometimes it grosses me out I mean, I guess I know what you mean. I'm always anxious when I cook my own chicken because I know that chicken's the one thing where if you fuck up cooking it, you'll just make yourself seriously ill. And I know that I haven't, but if you learn anything about me, it's that I have a lot of anxiety issues. There's always that anxiety in the back of my head, like the salmonella, like it's in you, Matt. Yeah. I guess all I had to do was get out of the car. Oh, well, there you go. So mission passed. Nice. You did it. Thanks, chat. You helped me. So now what are you doing? I don't know. Go do another mission. Oh, we have to pick our co-op game for tonight. Oh, yeah. So we're going to put it to a vote again, because that was... That seemed to work all right. But yeah, I've got my Switch charging and everything, so I am ready to roll with whatever we choose. Nice. I think our options again are going to be any of the Jackbox games we have. Clip Lash. Rift Tracks game. Rift Tracks game. Mario Kart. Mario Kart with the blue shells, if that appeals to y'all. Uh, maybe Fall Guys? I don't know. That hasn't seemed to be super popular with folks, but... Colombian cartel really hates me. Listening to the opera channel now. Peepy vagina. Peepy... Speaking of PB, I've found a way how you can isolate vocals from music, because after we were talking about it the other day, I've had the inspiration to make a version of... the Talking Heads song, Stay Up Late, where every line is just him saying, little pee-pee, and that's the whole song. Little pee-pee. I'm putting it together right now, and it's going all right. So just the whole thing's like, little pee-pee. Little pee-pee. Little pee-pee. Little pee-pee. Little pee-pee. Maybe I'll have it done by Thursday, but... You gotta have a music video for it. Little pee-pee. Little big bear. I wish when we saw David Byrne in person I could have got backstage and been like, David Byrne, why? Why did you make this? Why did you do this? Don't mind me, I'm just a dude with an Uzi. These games are basically like if I just followed every intrusive thought I ever had. Just like... They're really just about like... If you really followed your free will... Wow, what is going on here? In these days of moral hypocrisy, certain valuable commodities can be hard to import. On its approach to the airport tonight, a light aircraft will pass over the bay. It will drop several packages into the water. Make sure you pick them up before anyone else does. Like he looks like a certain like character actor, but I can't quite think of what his name is. Oh, I got two minutes. He looks a little bit like, who's the guy, the not Rick Moranis guy in Bob and Doug McKenzie? Oh, Dave Thomas? Yeah, he looks like Dave Thomas. This music's making me want to go to a rave. Right? Lazulia says he almost looks like Ray Wise. I could see that. I want to say Ray Wise has something to do with Grand Theft Auto. Ray Wise is apparently currently in a soap opera. I think it's The Young and the Restless, and I need to check it out because there's been screenshots of it where he just is waving a gun around, and it looks just like A-tier shots. He's also in some, I think he's like in God's Not Dead Thor or something. Yeah, he's in those. But why? Is he religious? No, I think he's just a working actor who will just, you know, who like nothing is beneath him. And that's what I really respect about Ray Wise is he's done like some really great stuff through the years, but like nothing is really beneath him and he just brings his A-game to everything he does. Yeah, totally. He's great. You haven't watched it yet, but he's on the show Psych and that's great. oh right didn't they be like a twin peaks there's even a twin peaks episode of psych yeah where they reference it and uh and ray wise is in that one too kind of making fun of leland he shows up at one point where he's like I tried to dye my hair but something went wrong I mean it's like and it's all white like it wasn't the show and uh because he plays a priest on on psych and uh Yeah, the Twin Peaks episode's good. The guy that plays Bobby's in it. The Harold Smith actor plays the Sheriff Truman parody. How come that guy didn't come back for the return? Oh, Sheriff Truman? Yeah. I think he just retired. He just didn't want to do it. Robert Forrester played his dad? He played his brother, yeah. Oh, God. My God, I cannot wait. Inga and I are right now in the middle of the bad part of season two of Twin Peaks, and I cannot wait to get to season three because she doesn't know anything about it. I'm like, have you even heard anything about it online or anything? She's like, no, not really. I'm like, keep it that way. It's amazing. I remember watching that when it first came out and just being like, what? Like, Like, I'm not one to usually give a shit about spoilers, but... When Kyle MacLachlan first shows up in that first episode, and you're just like, what the fuck? It's like... How do I... Oh, God. This game. It's killing me. Mendale says, Ray Wise in the Robocop documentary series Robodoc is so endearing. Yeah, he's great in Robocop. He's, uh... plays a real bastard he's really good in uh the the twin peaks fire walk with me movie because I know that they they didn't want to reveal you know who the killer was and everything when they first did twin peaks but uh once they did ray wise really really brought it you know to the point where it seems like it's all part of the plan all along so yeah Right now on Twin Peaks, we're in the middle of the arc. Well, I guess we just got done with it, where Ben Horn thinks he's a Civil War general. And James leaves town, and he's in this whole love triangle with a rich lady, and it's the worst thing ever. And then once it ends, it doesn't apply to anything, and it doesn't matter. Yeah. Yeah. like nadine loses her memory it's like the worst shit it feels like a show that's like five seasons deeper than it actually is where they just ran out of ideas uh you know what jen and I saw in the theater yesterday oh what groundhog day nice how was that It was very funny. Nice. Such a good movie. They just made a new Super Bowl commercial with Bill Murray and Brian Doyle Murray and the Ned Ryerson guy for that Groundhog's Day movie. Oh, really? Like a Jeep or something like that. I hate when they do that. And Super Bowl commercials are pretty stupid, but it's not bad. It's kind of cute. I kind of hate when they do that, though. like, reunions and commercials. Well, I don't know. I'd rather see a stupid Super Bowl commercial reunion than, like, some of, you know, these, like, you know, later sequels. You know, like, if, like, the Dumb and Dumber sequel movie was just a Super Bowl commercial, I think I would have been more okay with that. Oh, I see what I'm doing. Ah! Mr. Z Natural asks, are we doing a Super Bowl watch party like the last two years? Oh, I don't know. I don't think I can. Okay. yeah this weekend is gonna be yeah you've got a lot going on yeah so that's I always forget that that's that that's kind of creeping up so I know I forgot that it was even happening until someone emailed asking if we were doing it um I mean emmy might watch do something in the discord but we I don't think we're not going to do anything like official yeah And yeah, go go to a go to an actual Super Bowl party. I'm trying to encourage people, especially in the age of Trump, to to to get offline a lot because it's because you'll go insane if you're just on the computer all the time, especially right now. Don't go hang out with a pal from college or, you know, or. No, the police are after me. Sting and Stewart Copeland, they're chasing you. Oh, I got four stars after me. Oh, no! Mission failed. Oh, screw you, cops. Also, I think the halftime show this year is, like, Kendrick Lamar or something, which I like Kendrick Lamar okay, but I'm just, you know... Some halftime shows in the past I've been like, ooh, I wonder what's gonna happen for that, and this one I'm just kinda like, eh, I'm sure it'll be fine, but... It's not gonna be like when Prince was doing it, you know, or like, uh... or the best halftime show ever, that one that Creed did, where they had the Cirque du Soleil people flying through the air. So we need a faster car, that's the problem. We steal this guy's. Give me this! Oh my god, that fucking sound. What can I do? I'm out of my way, jerkface. Get the fuck out of the way! All right, I've been watching all this driving around. It's just making me think about, like, uh, because, yeah, like, I'm doing all the side missions in Arkham Knight right now, and most of them are Batmobile ones, and all I can think of every time I drive Batmobile around in Arkham City is that it must be such a nightmare to live in this version of Gotham City where just any moment this psychopath in a tank will just, like, bomb around the corner and just smack into your place of business and your car. So I'm about halfway through Arkham City's story now. I got every Riddler trophy in Arkham Asylum. Oh my god. But there's like two hundred and forty now. I did not get a hundred percent though because you have to beat all the challenges. Which takes quite a while. Yeah, Arkham Asylum I played, like, just the story, and that was enough. And then Arkham City I played the story of that, and I played the Harley Quinn's Revenge DLC, but I didn't do any of the other side missions on there. Arkham Knight, though, it's the one that I liked the least when I started playing it, but now that I'm kind of into it, I like the way that Gotham's really set up in it. And the side missions really make you feel like Batman. The actual story itself is kind of like whatever. But, like, I like, you know, you're kind of just, like, swinging around, and then all of a sudden you find, you discover Manbat, and now you have to do this whole, all this Manbat stuff, and... I don't know if I ever finished that game, to be honest. The side missions are the best part. I really liked, uh, I liked the Manbat side mission. I liked, uh, there's a side mission about the Mad Hatter that's a lot of fun. It has some of my favorite visuals, probably, in, like, the whole series. Um... Because at one point, the Mad Hatter, he does some type of hallucinatory thing to you, and you're fighting inside a storybook, and you're punching people, and then the page on the storybook flips, and you have to grapple up onto the page before it flips over, and then it's like a pop-up book. It's pretty neat. And the Ra's al Ghul side mission is pretty cool. It's good stuff. Good stuff, those Arkham games. Alright, I got all six packages. Now where do I go? I have five stars. How am I ever going to survive this? Let's see. Looking at the chat. Looking at the chat. Penguins nine one nine two said one year we all live stream the Super Bowl. Yeah, we did that on Discord and that was a little bit of a nightmare. We can't really do that on Twitch though because the The NFL is notoriously litigious, and that's another thing about we do those Super Bowl live streams. We have to find like a link online that lets us watch it. Yeah, it's always like weird and awkward kind of so. Oh, get out, get out, get out. Oh no. Oh no. Don't kill me. Oh no. Oh, I was doing so good. Play dead. All right. Let me try again. And we're going to be playing more Grand Theft Auto three next week. Yeah, we're trying. We're trying something out. We're going to play the same game a couple weeks in a row and see how that goes. And then we're gonna play some... I'm gonna play some Zelda for a couple weeks. Oh, I had a pitch for you. I guess we could... We didn't have our weekly meeting this week, but we were gonna do Skyward Sword, but I was looking, and there's also the Game Boy Advance Legend of Zelda Four Swords on there, which is two-player, so we could potentially play a Zelda that's both of us at the same time. And that's one that you can't play single-player, so I would have to play it with someone else to play it anyway, so... I don't know. Uh... But also, I've been promising to play more Skyward Sword for a while and haven't gotten around to it. I don't know. We'll think on it. I need to play that new Zelda at some point but I still just can't bring myself to spend sixty dollars on a game that like I know for certain I'll beat in like three days. I can't make the Super Mario Wonder mistake again. What do you mean like you beat it? Yeah Super Mario Wonder was a good game but it was just yeah it was very expensive and I beat the entire at least like the regular game in like like four days yeah. Like, uh, Tears of the Kingdom Legend of Zelda, like, that was a very expensive game, but I got a lot of play out of that. There's a lot you can do there. And that, uh, The Echoes of Wisdom, I think it's called, the newest Zelda game. It's basically, like, one of the Game Boy Zelda games, but, you know, in, like, three dimensions, so... Because back in the day, you had like your console Zelda game, which was three and more involved. And then you'd have like the Game Boy Zelda game, which was top down and kind of cutesy. And and I like that they're still doing both of those. But it's. But it feels kind of odd because they're all on the same console now. Rush, rush to the Yale. The love boat. Where that plane at? There it is. It's like a biplane from the nineteen twenties. I know, it's like an Indiana Jones. Yeah, it's like, is North by Northwest about to happen to you? What's happening? We need to put an airplane in this PlayStation game. What models do you have on the computer? How about this Amelia Earhart looking bullshit? Works for me. Rush, rush to the Yale. Somebody should make an Amelia Earhart video game. Like, what really happened to her? She gets sucked into, like, the Twilight Zone, and she has to fight, like, zombies and Bigfoot. That's so tasteless. She meets, like, oh, is it too soon for an Amelia Earhart joke? It's just, you know. You know, at a certain point in the game, she meets D.B. Cooper. Rush, rush to the Yale. Alright, now I gotta figure out how to get back without the police murdering me. Can it be done? I've kind of started farting around with making a script treatment. I think it would be a very funny movie if you just made a film about going back in time and bringing Mary Shelley to the present and just showing her what Frankenstein has become in our culture. I need a car. I need a car. You just take Mary Shelley and then you show her that video of Frankenstein singing Smooth by Rob Thomas and Santana at Universal Studios. This is your legacy, Mary. Oh, God. I'm driving the world's slowest. You're in, like, a cement truck. Yeah, you're trying to, like, evade the police. Oh, God. It's the only car I could find. Oh, that's a great joke. Sharp Doggy said the Amelia Earhart sitcom was never picked up, but there is a dead pilot. That's very funny. Aww. Is this a real song or is this made for this game? No, this is in Scarface. Oh, I haven't seen Scarface in a long time. This is great because I'm in a truck so I can't even see what's going on around me. We need to play the Scarface video game on here one of these days. That always seemed like a trip. I never played that. It feels like it's, uh, because, yeah, these games are really based a lot off Scarface, and then the Scarface video game was based a lot off the Grand Theft Auto game, so it kind of feels like a Street Fighter, the game, the movie situation, where... We've made this game based off this movie, based off this game. For those of you who've never played Street Fighter, the movie, the game, they made a video game based off the Street Fighter movie, which was just Street Fighter, the game, but it used terrible live action. I'm so dead. I'm so dead. Steal the bus! Oh. They shot you in the butt. You were shot in the butt to death. What an insulting and embarrassing way to go out. Is it time for our co-op game? Are you done? You've got to play this for a whole other week, Chris. In between, I'm going to play it a little bit more. It's not going to be at this exact point next week. Give it one more go and then we'll switch over. This is the last run for this. You've been doing alright. You made it through one mission. Stop. Gosh, Christ. Shake it up. Shake it up. This sounds like it's sung by the lady who sung the songs in Better Off Dead, who's also the same lady that plays Tommy Pickles' voice in Buttercup on the Powerpuff Girls. Sounds like it's the same artist. You've seen Better Off Dead before, right? Yeah. The lady that's singing at the prom in Better Off Dead is the voice of Tommy Pickles. Oh, weird. She tried to have a singing career in the eighties and then got into voice acting. There's a lot of crossover between Rugrats and The Simpsons. Yeah, Chucky's voice is part of The Simpsons' voice. Yeah, and I think... the animator at the time um I forget his name but before they switched to like yeah yeah yeah I think they did they handled the animation for the simpsons for like the first three or four seasons oh that explains why those look great in the later seasons they got a little more yeah they look more refined but they're less emotive it's like it's like everybody in the simpsons got like botox yeah those first four seasons are a little like you you could see a lot of like you know it's not just it doesn't every shot doesn't look perfect or like completely on model yeah and that but that weirdly made it you know more uh more emotive sometimes you know because yeah when they'd smile sometimes you'd like their smile like you're like really big or they're you know what I mean uh Oh, yeah, Meowdower says she's also the same girl in Pee-wee's Big Adventure, Dottie, the one who's Tommy Pickle's voice. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm a rebel, Donnie. A loner. No, it's I'm a loner, Donnie. A rebel. I need to watch that movie again, too. That's one, like, I've never been the hugest Tim Burton head. Like, I definitely watched, like, all those movies. But, like, whenever I was in a peewee mood, I mostly just watched, like, Peewee's Playhouse growing up. I feel like it was more that. I think when I was a kid, Peewee's Big Adventure kind of freaked me out. It's got some weird parts, yeah. Yeah. I think when I was a kid, I definitely preferred Pee-Wee's Playhouse, but now I just love it. I love big adventures so much. All right. Get out. Get out. Get out! Oh, my God. I'm out. Oh, no. I'm stuck. Bad video game physics have trapped you. I'm going to get killed here. Get back in the boat. Oh my god, did you get away? Yes! How did you survive that? Get out! Get out! No! Alright. We had fun, folks. There's a clip for tonight. More next week. Next time on Grand Theft Auto III. okay so now let's do a poll find out what uh co-op game we're gonna play sounds like a plan I'm voting I'm rooting for uh for for blue shell mario kart again because that shit was nuts that was really fun um Let's see. While you're doing that, I'm still seeing if there's anything else going on in the chat. But one of the animators for Rugrats was also the creator of Aeon Flux. Interesting. Oh. Speaking of McDonald's, if you want to look up some weird videos, and I've thought about using them for Mystery Hour before, but they're a little too long. Class Geek Supo very briefly did a line of VHSs about the McDonald Land crew where they look, the models for them are all like vaguely terrifying. There's one where they're in like a haunted house and there's another where they go on like a pirate adventure. I think I have all of those in my parents' house somewhere. uh all right folks like ronald mcdonald has a weird dog it's weird I put the uh poll in the chat there let's uh get that on the screen yeah and while that's going on we can see if we got any more shout outs or yes let me take a look um Oh, we are all caught up. Nice. Very cool. Well, then I'm just going to sit over here and bullshit. I'm just going to... Yeah, let's give everyone a minute. Get your votes in. We have a lot of fun stuff coming up at dumb industries, by the way, just take a moment. Uh, yeah, well, I guess we can, we can go ahead and bring up too. I don't think we've mentioned on any of the streams since we announced it. Uh, Rachel Lipman is our guest. So that's, uh, this is the first time we've said that out loud. So, Yeah, we have a returning guest. Her third time on The Mads Are Back, Rachel Litman, who's just a brilliant filmmaker, artist, writer, Yeah, nice lady. She's the best. And she's coming on to promote her new project, which is Easy AM, Promotional Record Volume Three, and features the voice talents of both Trace and Frank, plus Rich Coase, a.k.a. Sven Uli. Oh, nice. Is this the radio show thing that you were telling me about that she's working on? Yeah, she's been working on that for a while, because I remember you first told me about that. Yep. like a year and a half ago or something crazy. The Sklar Brothers, Ted Leo, Amy Mann. So you can actually listen to the whole thing right now. Download it over at Bandcamp. And she's pressing a very limited run of a hundred actual records of this project she's working on. So... Yeah. Oh, and we're going to raffle one off. That's why I brought that up. We're going to raffle off one of these records, and there's only a hundred of them. ever that are ever going to be made so so you can that's going to be a hot we have some other giveaways too we've uh we've been blessed this upcoming show next week a lot of folks have donated uh things that we can run giveaways for so I'm thinking actually just so we don't uh make you know the actual show too much we might do a couple giveaways during the pre-show oh All I have to say, show up early. Show up early. There will be instructions on how to do stuff in the little ticker at the bottom or something. Or I might pop up and just be like, hey, do this. Don't interrupt my work. No, I'm kidding. All right. I'm going to hit show results. Whatever's in the top spot is what we shall play. Oh, Jackbox. Oh, okay. I'm for that. I don't have to plug my Switch up or nothing. I am into that. I am totally into that. So what should we... I'm always a big fan of the Murder Mystery Party one, but whatever tickles your fancy, Chris. I kind of like the Gaspionage because the audience, once they start voting and participating, it's... That one has so many numbers. That's true. But we have played that one the least lately. Where is this? I don't like numbers. I don't like it when things are different. Wise Twin Sailor, yes. The record, you can get it at the band camp. Let me drop that link. Holy moly. Like the Jack box guy looks, he looks like Moby kind of it's a, yeah. Or like Michael Stipe or something. That reminds me, didn't you tell me that like Dave went to like some Moby thing and, uh, and it was right after he was being weird about Natalie Portman. So like, yes. So nobody like took any pictures or video of it. They were like, yeah, it was kind of strange. He was in the news. Moby's not a bad guy or anything. He was a monster. Nobody was like, get out of here, but also nobody was making a big deal of videoing it. Yeah, he was standing right behind me at a certain point. Someone said TKO. Multiple people are saying TKO. We haven't played that one yet, but everyone says it's a really fun one. Should we do that? We can give that a shot. I'm down. I'm down to try something new. And audience can join as well, so let's do it. It looks like a Ned Hardy shirt from like, two thousand and nine. Let's see. Audience on, audience suggested. Yes, extended stream, recommended for stream games. Are we not turning the audience suggestion on? Oh, sorry, I thought that that was on. Yeah, the quick training for the first time we play it might be. In the future, we can decide to turn that off. Manual censoring? No. No, no, no. No, no, no. All right. I think that'll do it. Sounds like a plan, Stan. Might have to take this off the screen for a second. Make sure I join it without Oh yeah, we go to the jackbox.games Yes Everyone head to jackbox.tv Or jackbox.tv Shit, I always get those mixed up It's rifftracks.games Jackbox.tv My keyboard is not working Ruh-roh What the What the What the fuck? What the fuck? It's totally... Oh, there it goes. Jackbox.tv. And I'm going to put the code in the chat first. So pay attention to the chat. I'm going to drop it in there in just a second. Yeah, once I make it in. Okay. Oh, shit. Matt putting it into private chat here. Okie doke. All right, I see that. I'm in, Tank. Matt's in. All right, guys, putting the code in the chat. And again, head to jackbox.tv. Oh, we are full. All right. Let's get this on the screen now. I've already set my victory quote as, suck it, nerds. Oh, we got a nice audience watching. All right. Nice. If you didn't make it into the game, you could still head to JackboxTV. Yeah, that's what's nice about these. They're really good at letting everybody, even if you're not in the actual thing. I got to get some more of these because they're all really fun. The problem is they all come in packs, and some of the packs have the same game. Yeah. Yeah. All right. We got Eric, we got Big Rig, we got Danny. Victory quote. What should my victory quote be? Shade says micro map. Is that like micro machines? I had a lot of micro machines growing up. That's a thing that kids aren't into these days. Just like remember when kids just wanted to play with with tiny versions of regular toys and then like your dog would eat them or you'd lose them. I don't know how to play this. Let's pay attention. It's like Pokemon. Welcome to TKO. I am the tournament master. Unless you're with the Old Navy credit card people, in which case that guy moved, I think. Thank you all for joining me here on T-Shirt Island. Those of you who give will receive a free flight home. Every epic tale starts somewhere. Yours begins here, at the training grounds. You will use your device to draw two drawings. What you draw matters not. Let your heart be your guide. And if your heart can't think of anything, just hit the suggestion button. It's time for your first drawing right now. Wait, what am I supposed to do? If you didn't qualify for the tournament, don't fret. Simply join the audience to submit your suggestions and vote on your favorite shirts. What are we supposed to be drawing again? I think I missed something. Just anything, I think. I'm just going with my heart. I don't draw really well like when I have to use like a mouse or a trackpad I always feel like it's uh it's hard I always feel it's like a five-year-old. That's why my drawing is... It's juvenile for two reasons, as you'll see in a bit. But it's... Can we use letters? Are we allowed to write things? Big Rig Blue says they actually give you the option to buy the t-shirts that win. That's interesting. Start selling these in our store. You're all just... By playing this game, you're selling your intellectual property to dumb industries. I hope you all know this. We're... That card was not for decoration, finish quickly! A swag generation meeting. So the audience is suggesting things for a Scooby-Doo toy boat. I saw a Killdozer earlier. Decent enough, but a bit traditional. This time try changing your shirt color with the little tabs at the bottom. Drawing two, begin! Oh, gotta do another one. Uh... I want you all to keep in mind that I've been drinking slightly tonight. When you look at some of these... Cocktails in Hell, Planters Peanuts, Wizzo, Gary Oldman, Akitar. Security guard at McDonald's. Drunk Matt. Someone please draw Drunk Matt. Look, I can't smoke weed anymore, so I picked up something called a beatbox from my deli, which is an eleven percent alcohol icy jukebox. Juice box. Time goes short. Hurry up and finish already. It got me through my telehealth visit with my doctor earlier today, and now it's going to get me through this. Red Serling. Red Serling. It's his evil brother. Pretty good. For your last exercise, you will write as many slogans or phrases as you can. These have nothing to do with your drawing, so just put those out of your mind. And don't give in to pride, use a suggestion if you need it. Go. Okay, um... Well I know that's not your best material, write another! Only seconds remain. Oh, God. Oh, yes. This is going to be good. I did not get many in there. I did literally one. Enough training. Direct your attention to your device. Select one drawing and one slogan to create the perfect t-shirt combination. And I do mean perfect. Oh, that's hilarious. These are rad. Okay, now I get it. This is amazing. You know what? I think just what came up is pretty good for me. I know. One that came up for me was amazing. Saba, it's all going to make sense in just a minute. Fantastic. Brace yourselves. Let the tournament begin. Gauntlet one. Yeah! Fight using your devices to vote. Gotta be piss, please. Piss, please. Oh my god. Oh my god, I'm dying. I'm super scared of the person that got my two slogans, because they're a little demented. I literally only had time to make one slogan, but it's a pretty good one. I was halfway through writing Frankenstein fucked my mom before it turned off and wouldn't let me do it, so I... Starting things off with a tie. Not very dramatic. Let's just say this one wins. Oh, it's like pretty half and half. It's like the election. Yeah. Versus? That looks like a punk band shirt. It does. I want that shirt. You know what? I'm going to go with Banishment. Shade says the new dumb industry's top selling shirt. You're in trouble. Piss please was Danny. That figures. Wow. You're on a roll. I didn't come up with that drawing or the slogan. Yeah, flip flops! I gotta go with that one. That one foot's kind of fucked up. Is that what my foot looks like after it's been frostbitten by the elements? Is that what's going on? That is the foot that I broke that toe on, so that would track. The circulation's not as good on that one. Do you hear my cat? Oh, is that your cat? Yeah. He was annoying me. I had to put him outside. Dude, you were crushing it, man. But it's not my drawing or my slogan. But you're the one who came up with that combination. Oh, okay. Okay, I get it. A new challenger appears. Oh, my goodness. just a guy given two birds okay big red blue says the drawing and the slogan gets points too okay I definitely came up with that drawing. Oh, nice. That's great. That's mine. Double middle fingers. Double middle fingers. The double deuce is Strong Bad would have said. Oh, Barbacks is the new champion. Nice. A new challenger appears. Oh, that is pretty, that fits pretty well. But I love Matt's double middle fingers. And the slogan. Just a man with a goatee and a bad haircut giving two middle fingers. That slogan, I didn't come up with that slogan, so that all does fit together very well. Is that an ice cream? Is that what's happening? Yeah. Oh, oh, wow. Yeah. Matt, killing it. Or Barback's killing it. Versus? Whoa. This is my new favorite game of all these. Who did that drawing? It's amazing. That is so good. I bet Danny did that. Is Danny in the game? I think so. I mean, he came up with the piss please thing. Yeah. The eyes. It's really well done. That is my slogan. Danny says I did indeed. Knew it. It's a great collaboration between the two of you. Danny, you want to make that a shirt? I'm down. Oh, so you won't put my patron of farts shirt in, but you'll put that. Okay, game over. Wow. It's kind of unbelievable how well both of these work. Oh, my God. This is the hardest I've laughed in a while. I will say this. I did the penis drawing. Oh, you did? I did nine eleven. Oh, well done, Dan. Good job. Good work. Great pair. Winners! How about a training break? Oh my god. My other slogan didn't make it. Use your devices to enter one new drawing and as many new slogans as you wish. Think outside the box. Go! Yeah. Okay. I'm so on the spot. I can't. While our contestants train, anyone watching the tournament can join the audience to submit your own suggestions and affect the outcome of the game. don't pee on my leg and tell me it's jizz someone suggested salad died trying dead horse being beat Something cryptic. Drunk Matt. Yeah, this is the... I picked the right stream to start drinking. This is perfect. Egyptian musk. That's good. Word salad. Egyptian musk. A broken iPhone. Cheers, everyone. What are you drinking, Matt? It's my beatbox. It's my alcoholic high-c juice box. That's eleven percent alcohol. But don't worry, I also have a Gatorade for hydration and a Coca-Cola for caffeine, so I'm just letting all the chemicals fight inside me tonight. Let them fight! Matt, I haven't had a sip of alcohol in almost seven years. That's awesome. I'm not a big drinker. I think I'm just a... Yeah. I'm just, uh, I've had to stop smoking weed because I, for a while, was smoking way too much, and then once I started detoxing... Oh, there's no such thing. Uh, I was doing like a ninety percent THC vapes, you know, and it was making me weird, so I had to... Time goes short, hurry up and finish already! The second gauntlet looms, and the hairy paws of Kismet have shuffled new drawings and slogans. Make a new shirt, do it! You know what, again, just the one that came up right away I think is still the best one. I got a great one. Whoever did my drawing, congratulations. This is like an Ace of Base song. Matt, your brother Ichabod Doll's hanging on our wall. I might need to get that back from you at some point. Inga wants to do another photo shoot with him. Well, we'll see. Gauntlet two. Oh, that's cool. Dances like Thomas. Glennis. Oh, man. He's getting so deranged. I like the Frank, though. Pretty accurate. It is pretty accurate. I like that they put Frank beside it so you know for sure who it is. How else would you know? Is that Frank Black from the Pixies? For a second I thought it was. See, Frankenstein Fucked My Dad is... You can't go wrong. I was gonna put Frankenstein Fucked My Mom the first time and ran out of time, so this time I wrote Frankenstein Fucked My Dad, and you know what? I think the waiting paid off. Oh, I think Glynnis is still in the top here. How did the string go? They got so drunk they started meowing at a certain point. All right, barbacks. Got a winning combo right there. Yeah. versus That is pretty good. It's pretty good. Oh my god, it's a real Sophie's Choice. What do I go with? You know what? I'm going to give Orson Welles a shot. Although they spelled Orson and Welles wrong, but That just makes it funnier. It would be great if it was Orson Welles. If someone just randomly said Orson. That is good. See, this one had me really conflicted because I wrote Frankenstein fucked my dad, but then the Orson Welles shirt is the one that I created. So it's like I couldn't lose. Parker Stevens can't lose. A new challenger appears. Oh my god. Look, I drew the butt, but I didn't come up with the slogan. I came up with the slogan. Oh, wow. So, Matt, we could put this in the store. Either sink into shit or shit in the sink. That's inspirational, I think. Just a butt. Just a butt. It kind of looks like my butt. There's not a lot of meat back there. I was looking at a photo of your butt when I drew it. Start a fire. Oh, too soon. This song makes me want to get into a fight in Chili's parking lot. I know. See, the butt's always going to... Oh. Okay, yeah. The butt's always going to win. Butt. Butt. Butt. Butt. Butt. A new challenger appears. Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! That is my drawing. Stick figures with boobs is just a classic. It's always going to be funny. Remember, did you watch the Ali G show? The original show? I've seen clips from it, but I haven't seen all of it. There's one where he goes to an art class and he's drawing a model and that's exactly what he's drawing. They pan over to him and that's what his drawing looks like. I was thinking of, I think there's an It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia episode where Dennis draws something like that. It's so hard for me to vote for these because I'm... My work is in all of these. It's hard for me to choose between my children's. It's my butt-drying skills. Ooh, I like that one too. That's kind of ominous. It's like Pikachu's gonna smother you in your sleep with a pillow. Or it's like your cat watching you masturbate. Yeah. We all know. Boobs vs. Butts. Boobs vs. Butts. Aster's fan says, flat butt. Flat Matt butt wins. It's not that flat a butt. Aw, it's been knocked out. Well, you can't stay at the top forever. Only the best shirts from the previous rounds remain the tournament ends here The nine-eleven penis gets it it's gotta It's going to be split, because a lot of people are going to vote for the cat. And the one on the left is quite controversial. We are definitely playing this like every game now, for every show now. This is my favorite of these now, officially. Yes. Yeah. A tie on the first battle? Fine, I'll choose. Well, yeah. Yeah. The computer loves nine-eleven penis humor, too. Versus? Fine. Nine-eleven. Nine-eleven penis. Someone mentioned this in the chat earlier, but yeah, there's like an adult version of the Jackbox games. Interesting. Yeah. They're a little saucy. I feel like we do a pretty good job of making these adult versions just by virtue of who we are. What are you talking about? All right. Versus? Yeah. I mean, fight. It's that one. It's the black one. See, I didn't make it a totally flat butt. It's got a little shape. It's kind of lopsided. Like, the left cheek has a lot more meat going on than... Your drawing skills, your anatomy is off, Chris. Yeah. Yeah. I'm rooting against myself. But you get points, too. You're just rooting for the best work. We have a champion. Yeah! I think we all learned a lot here today, about t-shirts and about ourselves. Holy moly. Oh, I love you guys. So, that's it? Mr. Znatural won, okay. Good job. Now how do we get that design to export? Jackie B, best writer, slogan used on four shirts. Best artist, drawing used on three shirts, wow. Oh, Eric was the fastest. Finished a drawing in twenty-four seconds. Hey! But my shirt won! My drawing won. Chris, I have the page pulled up where we can purchase the Sink in the Shit shirt if you want. How do we do that? Is there like a thing on the... On the page you have, it gives you a little window. Well, folks. This has been fun. We had fun here. We had fun tonight. Thanks so much for hanging out with us tonight. Yeah, it's been a good time. Yeah, we're going to go back to... I'm getting the Vimeo pulled up for dumb television here. We will resume our regular programming until three a.m. What should I put on? What's good? Whatever. It's all good. All dumb content is A+++++. Minus. Plus. Don't forget, tomorrow night is an all-new episode of Martian Shadows. Come right back here on Twitch. We'll be debuting a new episode. We've got an all-new Mystery Hour this Thursday. Wednesday is Emmy's birthday. She's going to be showing Nothing Lasts Forever. So watch that this Wednesday. Cool. So much stuff coming up. My God, there's a new Mads episode. Yeah, that's just a little bit over a week away. It's crazy to think that it's already here. It's freaking me out, to be honest. Good night, everyone. It freaks me out, baby. Thank you all who donated. Yeah, thanks, everybody. I'm going to put on Daughter of the Mine when we get off. So if you've not seen that, check that out. I'll be playing that. Incredible. Thanks for hanging out, everybody. We love you. Thanks, everyone. We love you. Bye. See you on the other side, Ray.

Matt & Chris hang out to play the series of Back To The Future games for NES, including Back to the Future and Back to the Future II & III, games that barely resemble anything actually related to the films, and then play an epic game of RiffTrax: The Game with viewers!

Transcript:

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Or send check or money order to the address on your screen. Sorry, no CODs. Credit card users call now, one-eight-hundred-eight-six-two-one-thousand. He had the moves. The punches. The Fighter. But there was one thing he would never have. A way out. Virtual Boy presents more challenges inside the third dimension. Mario Tennis, Tower of Buster, Little Arm, Galactic Pinball. Virtual Boy, a three-D game for a three-D world. Wanna play? Once again, folks, item J, three-forty-three, is the surfing monkey coin bank. It's great for graduations, wedding gifts, and I believe we sold out on this one last time, so please do not let this one pass you by. Now, let's go to caller Scott in Nashville. Now, Scott, I understand you just bought fifteen of our surfing monkey banks. Is that true? Yeah. Chill, man. I'm on TV. Oh yeah, you can find them at the market. We're talking about Flea Market Montgomery. It's just like, it's just like a mini mall. Oh yeah, come shop with us. I said Flea Market Montgomery. It's just like, it's just like a mini mall. Hey, hey, you heard me. Come shop. Living rooms, bedrooms, dinettes. We got it. Hey, hey, you heard me, come shop, I said flea market, Montgomery, it's just like, it's just like a mini mall. Hey, hey, living rooms, bedrooms, dinettes, oh yeah, you can find them at the market, we talking about flea market, Montgomery, it's just like, it's just like a mini mall. Hey, hey, don't stop, let's make it a dance, come on now, to the left, to the right, to the Let's do this dance. Hey, to the left, to the right. Let's make this a dance. Flea Market Montgomery. It keeps you jumping. It's just like, it's just like a mini mall. Take it out now, everybody. Like this now. Hey, hey. Flea Market Montgomery. It's just like, it's just like a mini mall. Don't stop. It's just like it's just like it's just like Is the influence a threat to me and my family? What are the symptoms? How to avoid it? If I get sick, what should I do to avoid infecting others? The answer to all these questions and more is with Doctor Amigo. Visit us and let us know how together we can stop this epidemic. What's the matter? I'm pregnant. Never kissed me like that before. Wow. I got a lot of catching up to do. I never missed you so much before. You should stay away more often. Like now. Where's Dan? I've been saving up some tongue for him, too. Oh, you know Dan. Playboy at heart. One week in the mountains, and he has to go to Las Vegas to recuperate. Rip Taylor's playing there. What's the matter, Steve? nothing's a matter but are you different I don't know what you mean different I'm still the same old lovable character I always was just not in this movie anxiety man oh geez why did I marry shirley temple excuse me he was married to shirley temple folks are you fact checking me yes Oh won't you come and join us? Oh won't you come and join us? That was weird. I'll tell the world. Go ahead. That was weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. The video you are watching is an interactive training video. As you are presented with the information in this video, questions will be asked to help you understand important points. When a question is asked, quickly select the answer you think is correct. After a three-second pause, we'll give you the right answer. Okay, we get to take this with us. To see how many questions you can answer correctly. Wait, can we start over? Pay attention to the video from this point on, since you never know when a question will be asked. Now proceed with the subject matter of this video. Cover-up specialists are very important people. They need to know hundreds of detailed procedures on how to clean. Do you think anyone's doing more than one wife? I wonder. Some people might. It amazes me when we get at the end of class, I'll see people's paintings and how much extra things that they've put into their painting that, you know, they get all these extra, like, did you start yesterday? Or, you know, it's... I don't know how they do it so... We do sometimes get paintings in advance if a student knows they can't make it but they want us to show their work. Oh, okay. We've had that happen a couple times. Ah, okay. I just love the wrestling theme. on the sand and uh and I still have memories of that of them like that I'm getting sand in their eyes and stuff but that was just too much going on in the painting to get it done in this amount anyway I don't want you going up there. Strange people upset her. Just leave her be. Why hasn't he fired her at this point? For real? How's mother? Oh, she's fine. She died a little bit. You said it would be all right. Yeah, it makes her happy. What about you? What makes you happy? Jeez. She's bugging me. Yeah, she's really all right. Just work. It's enough. Is it? It's enough. Jeffrey! Is that you? Chris, that's going to be me when I move in with you and Jennifer. Chris! Did you enjoy your dinner? Yes. Dan! Dan! Did you? Dan, I need some coffee. I need something. Better than I ever was. Dan! Mother, you were never a cook. Another CEO. A dozen future polo shirts to the rescue. That's a crock. I have to say, this plot is all over the place. Take that, Moses. Do you know any other songs? Classic cloud-based cartoon violence. Okay, cartoon, please stay out of my spank bank. So the old man gave birth to a smaller old man? That's right, kids. They've been fucking. Okay. Hello. Hello. Were you just rising from the floor there? I was trying to rise dramatically from the floor like I'm a Dracula or something, and it didn't work. And I think I gave myself a charley horse in my neck in the process. Matt, what did we say about you doing exercises without consulting your doctor or me? doing strenuous activity without warming up first I should have known I should have did some some neck rolls before trying to become a dracula you gotta you gotta penguins wants to know if matt lost heat in his building I don't think so I think you're just uh no I just I just like wearing wearing my coats it's uh you wear your coats indoors but ten minute walk to mcdonald's I wore a coat when I, look, we're not going to go through this again, are we? The people want to know. People have questions. I did wear sweatshirts when I was, I just, I just was lazy and I didn't feel like putting on shoes. I just slid shoes on. I do try to take care of my physical health. Are you wearing shoes right now? I'm not wearing shoes right now. Are you barefoot? I am barefoot, yes. Oh, on my on my hardwood floors that all slope in a way to where like I have to keep pushing my chair back up like I'm like I'm Dr. Evil in the Austin Powers movies. It's disturbing. Some disturbing stuff we're finding out here. Welcome, everyone. Sure. Hey, everybody. My name is Chris Gersbeck here with Matt Reiser. Yep, that's me. And we do this stream every Monday where we just play retro video games and chat with you guys. Most of it's just chatting with you guys, but we try to play, we try to incorporate a game somehow. Yeah, throughout it feels a little more thematic than just having another stream where we just come on and have no plans and just talk with people. So it's there's something going on, you know? but uh yeah tonight we're gonna be playing uh I don't know and uh yeah and speaking of my coat I don't know I felt it it did you just say we're gonna be playing I don't know is that what you just said well no I I have adhd and I was in the middle of like five different thoughts at once oh okay I was saying this this outfit felt like it was more thematically uh correct for tonight because this feels very sort of like future sort of like cyber punky maybe a little bit yeah uh and uh we're playing the back to the future games so it's uh uh Oh yeah, and you got the Back to the Future glasses at the Pizza Hut. Yeah, exactly. bring that up anytime I can because I had a pair of those they were really fun I don't know what it had to do with the movie but they gave kids these glasses and they were you know kind of futuristic looking I always think of like macho man randy savage when I think of these types of glasses in general but yeah these are very kind of back to the future sort of future version uh so yeah so we're gonna be playing uh primarily I guess we're gonna be playing the nes back to the future game chris is gonna play that and then I'm gonna take over and attempt to play Back to the Future II and III, the game, which was also for the NES. They crammed both movies into one game and didn't really achieve either. These movies are coming out six months apart. Just give us one game. It's fine. We need it out by Christmas. That Christmas was weird because a lot of people thought that the hovercraft was real, and it wasn't. The hoverboard. Yeah. There were rumors that that was a real thing. And pre-internet, you couldn't just look it up and be like, is this real or is this a joke? There were just rumors like, yeah, it was real. Yeah, they made him for the movie. Nobody had ever heard of special effects before that time. It was odd. I think it was like a marketing ploy, like just to get kids to shop for a toy that didn't exist. See, I would have been more convinced that like those shoes from the movie were a real thing than the hoverboard, the shoes that you put on and they laced up themselves. I always thought those were really cool. And those are a real thing now. They are. Yeah. But but much less impressive than that movie made them out to be. Definitely. I also just want to say this up top. If you would like to watch tonight's program without Twitch ads, without those pesky Twitch ads, you can do so over at dumb-industries.com slash superdumbbros. Um... and uh that's the super dumb brothers super club if you're kicking two bucks a month you get access to the whole back catalog which we've been doing the show for almost a year so there's some fifty close to fifty episodes up there and we've done bonus have we not missed in a single week in the entire year for this stream missed a couple I want to say like one or two like pretty early on but for the most part yeah we're here every single monday yeah That is wild. That is wacky, wild stuff. But yeah, we're going to be chatting, and of course, as always, we're going to be doing our live shoutouts, so scan the code and chip in any dollar amount, and we will do one of our patented bad impressions or sing you a little song. We've also been fielding questions lately, if you have a sensitive question for us that you would like to see answered on air. A question about Matt's toes. Those are welcome, too. Anything you want to ask? A question about just my lifestyle in general. I feel like the way I live life is becoming more and more... I feel like we need to call this segment something like Mind of Riser or something. Trying to get into the reasoning behind the weird things you do. yeah matt's mind like uh like herman's head you have like matt's mind and that's a or the mind of the mind of matt sia like mind of mencia but that show that was on comedy central remember carlos mencia how could I forget um the one good thing joe rogan ever did was getting rid of carlos mencia yeah I prefer carlos mencia now at this point Well, yeah, all he ever did was just steal jokes. He didn't, you know... Okay, so people have been commenting since the revelation on Thursday that you walked in. Twenty-three degree weather. It was probably even colder. It was twenty-three degrees when we were taping the episode, but... It was, I mean, it was eleven in the afternoon. It wasn't, you know, the sun was out and everything. Okay, so... let's say, twenty-five degrees, probably. Ten minutes there, ten minutes back in flip-flops. But a buffer where you're indoors for a brief period of time, yeah. Yeah, but how long before you were outside before you were just like, ouch, this hurts. I mean, I got about, like, I did realize halfway through my walk that I had made a critical error, but I just, you know, stuck with it because I was halfway there and Yeah, and look at this. Other people were saying they're worried about you getting frostbite. But see, that doesn't, like, because, like, your hands, like, it's, you know, I wasn't wearing gloves and nobody's ever, like, you know. Yeah, but you have pockets you could put your hands in. You know, like, it's... It's kind of like innate. You probably don't even think about it. You put your hands into your pockets. I love that we've gotten a good thirty five minutes of content out of this one story. This is I think we've only scratched the surface of this story. I do a lot of weird stuff. I'm definitely I am a mentally ill gentleman, you know, from both the north and the south kind of sort of. So I have a lot of. Yeah. Speaking of the North, yeah, I didn't go over this the other day. I did spend a lot of my early life in Michigan, so I think I have a skewed view of what is and isn't cold, because when I was a child, if the windchill was above zero, this is completely true, if the windchill was above zero, they would make us go outside for recess. And I remember being like nine years old and like begging teachers, like, can't we just stay inside and do homework? No, you have to go outside. I'm just assuming that you still like on these days would wear like a T-shirt and shorts or something, right? No, I was on a zero degree day. No, you got like the ski bib on. You got like I had my my my starter jacket on. This was the era when starter jackets were a big thing. The Charlotte Hornets jacket. It was a Michigan State one, but I did have a Charlotte Hornets jacket of some... It was like a windbreaker jacket, but it wasn't one of the official starter ones. Windbreakers are another thing that I have a weird relationship with. I hate the sound of those windbreaker pants from the nineties. I've never been... I have never been so happy for a fashion to go out of style and I hope they never come back into Vogue because that sound drives me insane. Yeah, the sound is very irritating. Zip, zip, zip, zip. Yeah. Like people walking down the hallway. Just thinking about fabric like slapping into itself and it's just, ugh. I have a lot of sensory icks. Yeah, we can get into more of my brain if anybody has sensory questions for me. But, you know, you were perfectly fine walking into a dining establishment in flip-flops with your frozen toes. You say dining establishment. I don't know if McDonald's really counts as a fine dining establishment. That's a fair point. Again, I think I've seen somebody have like an overdose at McDonald's before. I saw that this morning. um so anyway back to the future we mentioned uh donations earlier if you head to dumb dash industries.com slash donate we will give you a shout out in the form of one of our patented terrible impressions and we already have a few here so let's uh let's do some shout outs real quick before we start playing it also gave me time to figure out why my xbox controller decided it wasn't going to pair with my computer anymore even though it worked earlier today sounds good uh okay first one here says uh well this is from morbo first of all thank you morbo morbo thank you bud watching live with us tonight um morbo says in the spirit of the evening power of love you can pick the singer Oh, well, you know what one I'm going to pick? Well, first of all, let me go ahead and make sure I have all the lyrics to this down. I'm pretty sure I do. But, you know, when I'm put on the spot, I you never know. You never you never know. But but yes, this is. This is Gollum doing Power of Love by Huey Lewis. So do do do do do do do do do do do. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, More than a feeling, that's the power of love Don't need money, don't need fame Don't need no credit card to ride this train It's strong and it's sudden, and it's cruel sometimes But it might just save your life That's the power of habitus That's the power of mobile Thanks. That was awesome. Thank you, Morbo. Forklift Killer says the Back to the Future soundtrack was the first record I ever bought. Oh, it's the soundtrack to back the first Back to the Future. What all was even on that soundtrack? I think it was just a Huey Lewis album, basically, wasn't it? Well, there was the Huey Lewis song. Because there was Back in Time, and then there was Power of Love. Power of Love, Back in Time, but then they had all the songs that Marvin Barry... Oh, okay. It was like Earth Angel. Earth Angels on there. It's a great soundtrack. Not as good as the Back to the Future III soundtrack with that add contributions from ZZ Top. Oh, yeah. ZZ Top shows up. ZZ Top, as I call them. In the movie as well. All right. We got a couple more donations here. Let's see. Next one comes. Oh, this is what would Mitchell do? Oh, Mitchell. Thank you. And it's what would Mitchell do his birthday? Can you believe it? Oh, happy birthday. Happy birthday. How do we do the... I forget how to do the... Oh, no, it's not that. It's the balloons. How do you get the balloons? Is it two thumbs up? It's something like that. Oh. Whoa, you got fireworks. All right. Well, happy birthday. Happy birthday. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday. What would Mitchell do? Happy birthday to you. Woo-hoo! Happy birthday, What Would Mitchell Do? And also, What Would Mitchell Do says, spending my birthday with my mom in the hospital. Oh, I'm sorry. Well, I hope your mom's okay. But instead of cake, could I get Doc and Marty going back in time to warn Chris and Matt about COVID? P.S. I'll also accept one of those hot new Super Dumb Brothers shirts. Love, what would Mitchell do? Okay, wait. I like how you read that like it was a Casey Kasem letter. Dear Casey, I am Curtis. What would Mitchell do? If you would play Air Supplies Lost in Love, I'd really appreciate that. Yeah, so who's going to be who? Okay, I'll be Doc. You'll be Marty. And then how are we going to talk to ourselves? This might get confusing, but okay. Well, give it a shot. Screw it. Oh my gosh, Doc. Like, what's happening? Marty, I think we went back in time. Or forward in time. I'm not really sure. It's the year twenty twenty. What could possibly be happening right now? Oh, geez, Doc. I'm in the store. There's no toilet paper. And everybody's listening to the guy from Fear Factor about medical advice. What are we going to do? Marty, grab a newspaper. We have to do something important. What does it say on the front page there? It says... Oh, geez, Doc. It says that there's a Chinese virus that's making everybody sick and you have to wear a mask and you can't get near anybody. Oh, geez. Great Scott! Marty, you know what needs to be done. What's that, Doc? We have to warn the people, but we can't do it because then we'll break the space-time continuum. We have to warn someone else. Maybe some people who are just walking down the street right now. Hey, how about these two fellas? Excuse me, sirs! Who are you? Yeah, what's going on here? You have to do something important! There's a virus, you gotta tell everybody! Well, I mean, we have a livestream, we've got a couple viewers, I guess we could... That'll work! That'll work! Just warn everyone! Don't listen to Joe Rogan! It all makes sense. I wasn't planning on it, but okay... Yeah, we have maybe like a solid sixty people that show up. We can let them know. Excellent. Oh jeez, if you could do that, that'd be great. You seem like you're the utmost authorities in broadcasting in this era. Great Scott! Marty! We left the DeLorean unlocked. Oh jeez, get back to the car, Doc! There's no telling what could happen! Who the fuck were those guys? That was a full sketch right there. I hope that was sufficient. That's becoming my new sign-off for all of these. I hope that was okay. It's really hard playing yourself talking to yourself. Yeah, I need to work on a Michael J. Fox impression. That was pretty good. I was kind of just doing like my shaggy from Scooby-Doo, but a little milder and then just sort of putting my hands on my head a lot. Um, okay. We got a couple more here, but I'm really, I'm having trouble connecting my controller. So I don't know, maybe we should start with back to the future too, because unless you want to play the first one, I'll try to get the second. I've already got two and three pulled up over here, but, uh, why don't we just go straight to those? And then if I can get my controller to work. Okay, let me get my screen sharing going. Yeah, y'all are about to watch me suck so hard at this. Also, we discussed this earlier, Matt, but... Last week we did, it was really fun, we played Mario Kart, but only with blue shells. All hell broke loose. It was pretty great. So we were thinking maybe we could do that again tonight, or we could play a Jackbox game. We don't know what we should do. So I'm going to make a poll. What should we play as our co-op game? And I'm going to add Jackbox. It could be any of those. It could be that Scribblio game. It's like Pictionary. Rift Tracks game. Yeah, you could do Rift Tracks. Rift Track. That's the game where you are quizzed on a variety of different crackers and you have to... It's a hot new game. It's a hot new game. And Mario Kart. Blue shells only. And I'm going to drop this into chat. So yeah, so while we're playing, y'all can vote on that, and then we will tally the results, and that's what we'll do tonight. Boom. There's the poll, everyone. Let's take a look. I'm going to pin this. Yeah, while you're doing that, I'm going to take another sip of my Smirnoff Ice screwdriver I picked up from the deli before the show. They still make Smirnoff Ice? That they do. I haven't drank alcohol in so long. I just assumed it became a thing of the past. Nope, they still make it. It's not like Four Loko where they just gave up on it. Alright, back to the future. Because it was killing people. Okay, does that sound okay? Do I need to adjust the volume anymore? Maybe turn it down just a smidge. Okay, how about this? That's good. I feel like I'm like a guy at a pasta place doing the cheese, like, say when. I think that that was back in time. Oh, that was playing at the beginning of that? I'm pretty sure. Oh, interesting. Should I reset? Yeah, reset it, because I just want to... We were saying that Huey Lewis didn't license any music for this, but we could just be wrong. Well, Huey Lewis didn't license any music for the first one, which we'll see in a little bit, but this is from the I kind of don't remember how that song really goes, so it's a... I don't know. It sounds like it's... Oh, okay. I guess that technically qualifies. Yeah, this was... And also, that technically qualifies as back in time. Yeah, this is the era, you know, like we played Michael Jackson Moonwalker where they finally had the technology to kind of make songs that sound like the one from the movie. Right. Or album or whatever. The year of the year. Oh, what a great year. That was the year I came to New York. Your archenemy Biff stole Doc's time travel car and a sports almanac. He then traveled in nineteen fifty five and gave the book to his younger self. By the end of the year, Biff, using the information in the Sports Almanac, became the most powerful and corrupt man on Earth to protect the Almanac. Biff scattered objects throughout space and time and locked them behind closed doors as a result, and the space-time continuum is falling apart. Oh my goodness. Your quest, Marty, is to travel through time and space, find and eventually return those objects to their correct locations. The Almanac will then be destroyed and the future restored. You'll also need to find a remote controller which will allow you to call the DeLorean. I don't remember all that in the movie. I got my controller working, by the way, so we can dive into the first one when you get bored with this one. And I have a feeling you're not going to beat enough of this to get into Back to the Future Part III, but... I mean, probably not. Oh, you can go right in this game. I didn't realize that earlier when I was playing. Maybe this will yield some results. I like that I'm wearing surgical scrubs in this game. That's a famous outfit Marty wore, as we all know. And there's, like, Mario turtles. Uh... Mario Turtles. Can I not go in this door? Apparently not. Why is there a platform to it, then? What is this game? Who are you, people? Yeah, and, like, what part of the movie is this even supposed to be? Like, when he's... He's at... He's in the alternate, and he's... Biff is... Is this, like, the building of Biff's casino? Oh, no. It does say Biff's in the background. But in the background? So what is he... Are these, like, bottles of malt liquor I'm picking up? I don't understand what's happening in this game. We got raiders? Did we just get raided? What's up? What's up, raiders? What's up, room raiders? Where are you raiding from? We just got raiders. Hello, raiders. Welcome. Give us a follow. We are Dumb Industries. Oh, I've missed the key. We're playing Back to the Future II and III. We're going to play Back to the Future I. In a while, we're going backwards for reasons unknown. For logistical controller related reasons. Well, this is the more impressive of the two games, I think, which is really saying something. It's charm. It's just, I don't understand. It literally has nothing to do with the movies you'll see in a moment. He's not even on a skateboard. Who are these like tiny piss jugs just walking around? It's like, like, how do you make a game with Marty McFly in it and not put him on a skateboard? Oh, here we go. Oh yeah. Hoverboard. That's it. It was the whole thing. They don't go over water. You need power. The DeLorean looks like a shoe. Where are the raiders coming from? What channel? Let's see. We got some raiders from MC Grim. Oh, very nice. Thank you so much, MC Grim. If you're still listening. What the? I cannot get on the stupid platform. just stop stop putting me here just take me to the other side change the category on twitch to back to the future part two and three there's two hundred thirty nine followers of that game so who knows who knows all right we got some more shout outs here nice sounds good oh I okay this is a good one this one comes from our good friend misty jamie thank you so misty jamie thank you uh misty jamie says colombo investigating the theft of randy macho man's favorite flip-flops oh my god so am I I'm macho man I guess yeah so you let's just say like you're in the locker room and I'm coming in you just finished a Uh, excuse me, uh, Mr., uh, Macho, uh, Mr. Man, uh... Please! My fans call me the Macho Man. You can just call me Randy Palofo if you care. Well, I really appreciate that, sir, and great fight out there. Oh, Mrs. Columbo's a huge wrestling fan. Oh, yeah! Listen, I am sorry to bother you. You're obviously very busy, but I am investigating the theft of your flip-flops for you. I know you put in a report, and I'm going to get those flip-flops back to you. I am so thankful you're here, brother. Those are my number one pair of flip-flops. I like to wear them out going to the McDonald's. I like to wear them going out to the store. The macho man doesn't always have time to put on his shoesies. And it's, uh, when you're as jacked on the roids as I am, it's, uh, sometimes you can't bend down too well, so you gotta have some flippity-floppies! They're my favorite pair. They come from the Rainbow Corporation. Oh, yeah. They're quite expensive, so if you could track them down, the Macho Man would appreciate it. I did not know that flip-flops were that near and dear to you, but it makes total sense. Flip-flops are life. Flip-flops are love. Ooh, there's an entire room full of malt liquor. Just one more thing, sir. You are aware of an invention called shoes, correct? The macho man doesn't have time for closed-toed shoes. The macho man's toesies need to be free to wiggle around and explore the space. Well, good day to you, sir. You too, Detective Columbo. Find my shoes and tell that son of a bitch Hulk Hogan I fucking hate his guts. All right. Thank you, Mr. Jamie. End scene. Thank you, Mr. Jamie. Let's see. We got another one here. I need to work on my macho man. We got another one here from Melissa M. Thank you, Melissa. No prompt here. We can just go crazy. You want to get nuts? Let's get nuts. You want to get nuts? Let's get nuts. Do you think that that was a direct reference to Prince's Let's Go Crazy song, because he says, let's get nuts. You want to get nuts? It's possible. I think it's more just that Michael Keaton probably wanted to do some real acting out of the suit with Jack Nicholson. And so they just had to come up with some stupid ass scene for him to. Hey, I love that scene. it's just so goofy. It's like, stop it. That movie's pretty Batman. But when I watched that scene, I'm like, that's not Batman. Uh, what's, what's something good we can do for, for this one. Thank you for watching. Yes. Thank you, Melissa. Uh, I could do, uh, uh, here's, uh, here's Randy Newman singing, singing the song Chattahoochee by Alan Jackson. Uh, Well, way down yonder on the Chattahoochee It gets hotter than a hoochie-coochie We made lover on the Georgia night We got a little crazy but we never got caught Down by the river on a Friday night Pyramid of cans in the pale moonlight, talking about cars and dreaming about women, looking for a plan just to live in for the minute. Way down yonder on the Chattahoochee, never knew what Melissa really meant to Randy. Wow. I think that was most of the words to Chattahoochee. I got a couple of them wrong. Well done. Thank you, Melissa. Thank you, Melissa. Matt, we have our first question of the evening. Oh. I like this. Shout out to Scribbler Johnny. Thank you so much, Scribbler. Thank you, Scribbler Johnny. Thank you, Mr. Scribbler. Scribbler Johnny asks, what was the first album you ever bought? Ooh, interesting. I'm trying to think, like, first album I bought with my own money, it might have been, like, the Wayne's World soundtrack or something. Yeah, like, well, I mean, the first albums I ever got as a kid, I think my parents got me Weird Al's Greatest Hits Vol. II, and then my dad was always trying to, like, buy me, like, Christian albums. which never took. I had a couple of the wow compilations, which were like the now that's what I call music, but for Christian music. So would you open those and just be like, oh, cool. Pretty much. Yeah, I'm like, oh, thanks. I guess I'll give this a shot. I learned a lot about Stephen Curtis Chapman from those. But the first I ever bought with my own money was in two thousand four. Sammy Hagar reunited with Van Halen for a horrible tour and they released the best of both worlds, which was a compilation album that had the best Sammy Hagar, Van Halen songs and David Lee Roth ones. So I bought that. It'd be great if it was like the best of both worlds, but it was all just David Lee Roth. It was all just the David Lee Roth ones. But what was weird was like, it's because I'm not as much of a Sammy Hagar hater as some people are. I think the first Sammy Hagar Van Halen album is quite good, but none of the songs on that album were really from that one, except for like the radio ballads. Because that's the one where like Dreams comes from and Love Walks In, which are fine, I guess. But that album has like Get Up is from that album. That's a great song. Good Enough is a great song. You could tell they started writing that when David Lee Roth was still in the band. It still has that kind of vibe to it. And then after that's when they started making like the Crystal Pepsi music and everything. There's some viewers who have like cool responses. Like our responses are kind of like run of the mill. It's either the Wayne's World soundtrack, but I bought that on cassette. I'm trying to think of the first CD I bought. Who the fuck is this guy? I can't remember. Commando Crow first was Faith No More. Oh, that's a tight one. Was it the one with Epic on it? You want it all, but you can't have it. First Violent Femmes album was Bekdu's first album. Very cool. Nice. That is a cool. That's a good thing to tell people because then you're instantly like, whoa, you must be cool. You must have a cool uncle who's like, you have to listen to this record. Were you ever into the Violent Femmes, Matt? I mean, I know that one song, but other than that... You never went through a Violent Femmes phase? Nah. Because most people do at some point in their life. I heard Blister in the Sun on the radio a lot, and like most people, when they started playing guitar, that was an easy one to figure out, so I learned that, but... Yeah. Outside of that, not so much. Nothing against them, I just never really... That's just one I never really dipped into. Ellie Mena says, the first I bought was No Doubt. That might have been a pretty early one for me, too. Tragic Kingdom. I know I had that. I just don't know when I bought it. Eric McKeddon, the first one I personally purchased was Mudhoney on LP. That's a good answer, too. which album I love mud honey I've I don't know if we've ever discussed mud honey matt we don't really ever discuss music at all we're too busy talking about all of our fairly are fairly kind of different from each other like yeah but yeah but but I mean like you know we understand the good and bad music you know type of thing yeah at the very least you're not like a fan of um I almost said Creed, but that's like too, that's like too cliche. Well, I do have to say when I was in high school, I've told the story before. I went to see Motley Crue in concert and it was very disappointing, but they were opened for by Papa Roach. And that concert kind of converted me to liking them because I'd never thought twice about Papa Roach, but they put on a surprisingly good concert. Cut my life into. like it had a lot of energy that guy he's a great showman so I did go through the the briefest of Papa Roach phases this was after they were new metal this is when they they started like flat ironing their hair and they did like that scars song tear my heart open uh so I I mean I have bought some lame albums in my time for sure uh I don't know I feel like when we talk music that really is where uh the age difference between us really becomes yeah becomes more apparent one of the first cassettes I bought was dukey yeah that was one of my first cds too oh american idiot was an early one that I bought too that's uh What was interesting with Dookie was, like, it came out on CD, but, like, there was, like, three different... What are these little guys? There were, like, three different copies you could get. One, remember, like, CDs would have the spine? One of the CDs just had a black spine, right? One of the other ones had, like, a see-through spine, and there was, like, a little design in the spine that you could see through. And then the one that I had was, like, a brown case on the other thing. Oh, brown. That's very creative. I know. But I wonder if, like, that was... Was that a special edition? Did I get, like, a first one? The special poop-colored album? Special shit album. Thanks for the question, Scribbler Johnny. We have a couple more donations here. Very nice. Lay them on me. Sock it to me. Next one comes from Spirocite. Spirocite, thank you so much. I look forward to your weekly meme if you're feeling up to it. No pressure. I have a feeling the weekly meme is going to involve your toes in some way, some fashion. Well, now you put ideas in their head. You've corrupted the purity of the art. If anyone hasn't heard the story yet, we uploaded the story Matt told on Thursday to our YouTube channel. It's sadly one of our better performing videos currently. Yes. So go to our YouTube channel. Yes, but long story short, I walked to McDonald's and flip-flops and nearly had an altercation with the security guard. But not why you might think. Not why you might think. I literally have no idea what the hell is happening here. Yeah, I wonder if... I mean, you're obviously still in Back to the Future, too. I'm, like, stuck. I can't... But anyway, did Spiroscythe have a prompter or anything? Spiroscythe. Oh, you can get those guys. It says, can you act out Huey Lewis selling encyclopedias door to door and meets Palpatine who asks for a Sith edition? What does Huey Lewis sound like when he's just a dude? I don't know. The only time I've ever heard him talk is when he goes like, you guys are just too darn loud. Yeah, I'm afraid you guys are just too darn loud. That was pretty good. It kind of sounds a little bit like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs too, but that's... Maybe I should start doing Buffalo Bill for impressions. Puts the lotion on the skin. Puts the lotion on the skin. Puts the lotion on the basket! Puts the lotion on the basket. That's a good precious. Ding dong. Yes, hello. Who is at my door? I have no solicitation signs all over the place. This better be good. Oh, I'm sorry, sir. My name's Huey Lewis, and I've been ordered by the court to go door-to-door to sell encyclopedias, and I was wondering if perhaps you would like one of my encyclopedias. Hmm, I like the idea of a man being punished by forcing to sell encyclopedias door-to-door. That is so evil, I should have Lord Vader do that soon. I would perhaps be interested, what do these encyclopedias have inside of them? Well, like this one right here, we have, uh, A. Anything you can think of that begins with the letter A. You'll be able to look up and find out all about it. So I can learn about aardvarks? Yes. Or, uh, agriculture? Yes, agriculture is in there, yes. Or, uh, the Anasazi Indians? Native Americans, I'm sorry, I'm trying to be more woke. I'm watching my language. Yes, and, uh, sir, I, uh, don't want to pry, but you are a Sith Lord, is that correct? Yes, I am a Sith Lord. So, do these have any information in them pertaining to the Sith? Could I look up the story of Darth Plagueis the Wise in one of these? Yes, in fact, uh, we have an entire Sith edition of our encyclopedia collection. Might you be interested in that? I would perhaps be interested in that. How much does this cost? Six hundred, sixty-six dollars and sixty-six cents. Hmm, that is quite steep, but I like the... the cheap symbolism that you're using. I'm perhaps interested in that. Triclops' college does not start back for another semester or two, so I have some extra scratch around. Do you have a payment plan, perhaps? No, but we do accept Venmo. What is your at? I will look into it. At Power of Love. Okay, let me get this together. Triclops, do you remember what my Venmo password is? I have an important purchase to make. Someone in the chat said this is becoming improv. It became improv kind of a while ago. We need to take an improv class. That would be a good company expense. We'll just go down to the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater. Does that even exist anymore? I don't know if it does. I thought that they went out of business, but then I thought that they reopened. But aren't they like a weird cult? I mean, every comedy theater is kind of a weird cult in a little way. Kind of, but I just feel like after, you know... Attempting a career in show business the past ten years it I would hate to like Sign up for improv one-on-one, although Could be beneficial. I don't know what I'm talking about. Yeah Well, I think it's it's only like really cultish if you're planning to go through the whole program If you if you just did like a class to just learn some some skills, I don't think that they would Oh God, but then but then the thought of having to interact with improv people is harrowing Aaron M. says, the Huey Lewis concert at Universal Studios during Mardi Gras were some of the best concerts I've ever been to. I believe it. Huey Lewis, I'm sure, puts on a good... He's a showman. I bet you those shows are tight as hell. The eighties was a great time to be just like a middle-aged white guy who wanted to make soul music. Huey Lewis, Hall & Oates. Yeah. And others? Mainly those two, I guess. Mainly those two. Those three, really. Or Robert Palmer, that's another one. Oh, yeah. His cover of Mercy, Mercy Me is one of the most obnoxious things ever. My dad loves that song. He played it like three times in a row on a car trip, and my mom at a certain point was like, fucking turn that off. Uh, Danny says you two literally do more improvising every night than most improvisers do in a month. Is that true? Well, I don't know. We're not very good at yes-anding, really. I've never been involved in improv. I went to, like, I did, like, a sketch show once, like, nine years ago. I got my start in comedy doing Christian improv. Yikes. There's videos of this online. If I'm feeling bold one day, I will tell you what the name of our improv troupe is. And you can look up the results of that because it wasn't even like long form improv. It was like short form improv. So it was like Christian. Whose line is it anyway? There was an improv troupe at my college and I was still trying to do like music back then. Like I was in high school, I played guitar and was in like, you know, several crappy punk bands that played like, you know, one party and then promptly broke up. Mm hmm. And then one day my neighbor at the time in college across the hall from me in my dorm was like, hey, there's like an improv troupe that they're putting together. And I was like, well, I'm not going to get this, but you know, it's something to do tonight. I'll go and hang out at this audition and just like fart around. And then they liked me so much that I made the team. And, uh, and then my senior year of college, I led the team and I made it not a Christian improv troop anymore. I mean, I guess, I guess it technically was by just by virtue of, you know, it was a Christian university. It happened at, well, it was, it was created the first year I was on it. So it was, you know, only like three years old by the time you have to release like a press statement, say, um, That we're no longer affiliated with Jesus. Christian improv troupe breaks up with Jesus. No, we just started making more of our comedy, just more and more general. And that made us more popular, though. That's part of why I decided to start pursuing comedy, because doing that really inflated my ego. Because I'm like, wow, a lot of people are showing up for this. And in hindsight, I just realized that it was the only activity on campus that didn't directly involve Jesus in some way. So it was just... People were just desperate for things to do. And then I tried to do comedy out on my own and was humbled very quickly. Oh, yeah. Stand-up is... It's not easy. I don't want to say... It takes a very disturbed person to excel at that between just, like, the amount of just hustle you have to have to make it happen and then, like... there's that but it's uh even when you're an amazing comic you still have bad nights and you know it's not like I've ever really like ever killed or anything but bombing is like literally the worst feeling in the world you know yeah it's it's pretty sticks with you for days it's real and when you do it all the time you start getting to a point where it's like yeah like your self-worth just becomes like how well you did on your last set and it doesn't matter how many good ones you had in a row and then you have like a bad one and you're just like failure and it's like And then if you take like, you know, a week off from doing an open mic, you just feel like you've like quit it forever. And it's like, it was just... It's, uh, I would love to start doing comedy again. It's just like a, like a fun on the side thing to do. But when I was like seriously trying to pursue it, I was just like, it was not enjoyable. I was just like spending all my time on trains and like doing, you know, like the eleven thirty Mike at Creek in the cave and then like waking up exhausted to go to my day job. And it was. Yes. Yeah. I don't even remember. I don't think I've ever seen you do just like stand up, not as Ichabod. Not as Brother Ichabod. It wasn't very good. it was uh yeah like I I mean you all have seen me talk it's uh oh wow penguins says everyone bombs at some point I saw daryl hammond bomb at the comedy cellar and he started going off on you I'm not doing great at this do you want to switch over to the other one let's do it Let's do it. Back to the Future II, everybody. I'm sorry that I could not figure out what the hell was happening in this. It's a very confusing game. I really should have looked up a walkthrough on it before we went live. But yeah, sometimes you see really good people bomb. I don't know. I've seen Dave bomb before, I think. I've seen Dave bomb. I've seen... I mean, everyone, everyone bombs. I don't even want to name names because it sounds like. Well, no, it's you're naming names in a way where it's like, you know, it happens to everybody. It's not like you're trying to be like, oh, they fucking sucked. It's just, you know, it just it just happens when you do this. You know, it's a. Can you hear that? Yeah, I can hear that. I'm going to reset it just so we, you know, get the full get the full experience. Uh. Michael Richards bombed J-Pose. Yeah. Yeah, that was... I feel like if that had happened today, he'd be on Joe Rogan tomorrow, probably. You know, Michael Richards, that wasn't good, but he's owned up to it and been like, I fucked up. When that happens to most people these days, they just pivot to being a right-wing weirdo now. Exactly. At least he took a step back and He was like, yeah, I fucked up, and I'm just going to go away for a while. Yeah, and then he came back on curb, and he made fun of the whole situation. It was very funny. And then he didn't really do anything else. He stopped doing stand-up after that, though. Yeah, that's probably a good call. I mean, come on, you know how much that cast was making on Seinfeld by the time it ended? Yeah, he shouldn't have had to have done anything else after that if he was playing his money right. What was so weird, though, about Seinfeld, to kind of pivot off that a little bit, is how none of them really did... They all had problems with their follow-up shows for the longest time, like... What is the most popular Seinfeld follow-up? Veep and Curb, probably, and it took like, you know, fifteen years after, before, you know. Well, Curb is like right after Seinfeld. So, yeah. But they don't consider Larry David being a part of that. yeah well yeah as far as like the main cast goes yeah like uh yeah yeah jason alexander had like so many failed sitcoms there was like what was it bob whatever yeah he played like a motivational speaker yeah I can't even remember bob patterson I think that's what it was called uh yeah but veep veep is so good that it kind of makes up for yeah all the fat all the past you know jerry seinfeld made the b movie oh my god the b movie So what is this supposed to be? This is Back to the Future. You look like you're dressed like a member from Sha Na Na. You don't look like Marty McFly. You look like Bowser. I'm not even hitting things. I'm just falling. Like that. Why did that happen? Yeah, this is... I think you said it earlier, this feels more like the Paperboy than it does, like, a Back to the Future thing. This feels like a different game that they had already made, and then Back to the Future came out, and they tried to just slap that theme on top of it. They were like, we'll put some clocks in it, and that'll make it Back to the Future-y. But that's literally the only thing. Everything else, like, the girls on the... Yeah, none of this makes sense. Speaking of bees, there's some bees. You get chased by bees in this. You know what, Poopy? And you get beat up by village people. Yeah, you get beat up by Harvey Fierstein or whoever that's supposed to be. Yeah, this is like the My Girl video game. You're getting chased by bees. Wise Twin Sailor says Jason Alexander was married to Britney Spears for two days. Oh, yeah, that other guy named Jason Alexander. That is technically true, but it's a different Jason Alexander. Yeah. That just reminded me, though, speaking of people that were married to Britney Spears, you just reminded me of Kevin Federline and Popo Zhao, the greatest song of our generation. Popo Zhao. Can you put that in one of the pre-show reels? Is there a music video for that? I don't even know. There's a video of him playing that in the studio to MTV News. And it's so hilarious. I can track that down. He's like... He's so proud of it. He's so proud of Popo Zhao. Just imagine being the guy filming that. You're like... I don't even know what that means. Is this guy for real? Does he really want us to film this? He's still in the news every now and then because, you know, the whole free Britney thing. Yeah. I'm pretty sure he still has, like, shared custody of their kids or something. Yeah, you know he's gotta be, like, at least a little set on money. Like, you know. Dude hit the jackpot. I kinda hate this game. Yeah, this song is not anything from Back to the Future. I like the guy's just moving glass that you can run into like it's a Buster Keaton film. I don't understand why they didn't put him on a skateboard. Come on. This also just needs a guy with a big bunch of eggs in his hands that you can run into or a guy with a fruit stand. I'm trying to think of what this song reminds me of. Ah. Yeah, Beckdew says this looks like Paperboy. Yeah, this is like a weird Paperboy clone that they tried to say was Back to the Future related. But they forgot to give him a skateboard. I had Paperboy. Did you have Paperboy? I never played Paperboy. I know what it is, but... It's pretty fun. Nemesaur Kobo says, Bees, my god. Yeah, this is more of like the Wicker Man video game. Not the bees! Not the bees! This is what's so frustrating. So you beat that level. You're like, oh cool, now I've got to change the scenery. Nope. Yeah, at least the Hill Valley map does vaguely look like it does in the movie, I guess. That back lot that they also shot Gremlins on. That's all I can ever think of when I watch Gremlins. And Forrest Gump. Oh, yeah. Every time I watch Gremlins, I'm just like, this is just the town from Back to the Future, but with fake snow on it. So I wonder, did they do Back to the Future II there, too? They must have. Probably. They just featured it up a little bit. I mean, those are all Spielberg-affiliated films. So, yeah, it's Gremlins and Back to the Futures. and Forrest Gump, of course. Forrest Gump, yeah. I forget that he had something to do. No, he didn't. I was just joking. It was Robert Zemeckis. He might have produced it, though. Who knows? Zemeckis has a weirdly kind of James Cameron-esque career arc where he was doing really good stuff and then he just went all in on his weird CGI movies and then just kind of dropped off the face of the earth after that. like he thought that that like polar express uh like christmas carol technology was gonna be the next big thing and with him I think it's like he you know roger rabbit was like really oh yeah that was incredible that movie's great yeah that movie's still great I watched that again not too long ago and it's I think he made that movie and it was such like an amazing technical achievement that he was trying to break new ground and it just never really took off you know yeah well he was always trying to yeah push stuff technologically and uh yeah but then he kind of flew too close to the sun with Polar Express and then it was all just downhill from there but yeah it reminds me of James Cameron because yeah James Cameron was also pushing the envelope for a long time and doing stuff and then he just went all in on those blue people movies and now that's all he's interested in Yeah, it's, like, what's funny is, like, Jurassic Park was, like, the first big CGI movie, and Spielberg, like, those special effects don't hold up, right? Yeah, well, they did a very good job of disguising those effects with, like, the dark and the rain and stuff, because they knew the limits of the technology back then, so they didn't just, like, you know... But you would think Spielberg would have gone crazy and started just making all CGI movies after that. He really didn't. Well, have you seen Ready Player One? Well, yeah. But I mean... But yeah, you're right. It wasn't... Yeah, that was much, much later. I was joking. But yeah, after he did all those, he started going... He wanted to be a serious filmmaker when he started... yeah you know like because did he do band of brothers he did yeah he started doing stuff like that and did he do munich too am I imagining that yeah like it's warhorse who could forget warhorse the adventures of brinton tintin is that weird tintin rin tintin was a dog oh right tintin Yeah, Spielberg has an interesting kind of career trajectory. He also made The Lost World, Jurassic Park. Maybe that was his last kind of hurrah for trying to do a big blockbuster like that. And he was just like, yeah, I think I'm done after this. That is a bad movie. I was so excited for that. And then I was never excited for another Jurassic Park sequel ever again after that. It just killed my entire interest. They're never good. Every Jurassic Park sequel is the same thing. Well, yeah, every Jurassic Park movie, I always post the same joke on Facebook and Twitter when a new Jurassic Park movie comes out. Spoilers, the dinosaurs get out in this one because it's the same movie every time. The new one, it's like the dinosaurs are filming one right now. I don't know if you knew that. Yeah, like Scarlett Johansson's in it or something. The last Jurassic World movie was more about bees than it was about dinosaurs, speaking of. Or locusts or something. There's a whole locust subplot. At least it's not the dinosaurs got out again, I guess. If I want to watch a movie about locusts, I'll put on The Exorcist II. Watch James Earl Jones turn into a leopard or something. That is the weirdest movie. All those Exorcist sequels are awful except for the third one randomly. And that's because that one basically is a different movie that they slapped the Exorcist onto. Oh, by the way, I watched Nosferatu the other night. Oh, nice. The new one? Yeah. Nice. What'd you think? I loved it. I thought Skarsgård was amazing. And nothing like what I even was expecting. He really did a cool thing with that. Yeah, I really liked it, too. I only just wish I hadn't gone to see it with my mom. Yeah, well, that's insane. I told Jen that while we were watching it. Especially when you see his pee-pee. Yeah, when you... Little pee-pee. You see Nosferatu's pee-pee. Every time you say pee-pee like that, I just think of the one, isn't there like a Talking Heads David Byrne song or something like that? Little pee-pee. Little pee-pee. I've hated that since I was a kid. Little hands, little pee-pee. Little pee-pee. But yeah, I did go unfortunately watch that with my mother and it was, we were falling asleep through the first half of it and then we felt horribly awkward for the second half of it. We have a bad track record of going seeing movies like that together. We also saw Rob Zombie's Halloween in the movie theater together, which is also another one that you don't want to. Because we love the Halloween movies, but we were not familiar with the vibe of Rob Zombie. Where it's just all just like crass hillbillies yelling at each other. It's basically like, yeah, it's like, oh, you want Michael Myers origin story? Here's your fucking Michael Myers origin story. Ha ha. I don't know. What do you think is worse, Rob Zombie or Zack Snyder, like as a director? Oh, Zack Snyder, a hundred percent. Rob Zombie's made a couple okay ones. I really, really like Devil's Rejects. That's a good movie. I haven't seen any of those. House with a Thousand Corpses is a guilty pleasure of mine. It's basically just a Texas Chainsaw Massacre ripoff. But yeah, I like those okay. Lords of Salem is alright. But yeah, those Halloweens he did were... I think those might be the only movies I've ever seen of his. Oh yeah, well that's... That's, yeah, go watch House of Thousand Corpses, and then especially watch Devil's Rejects, because it's basically, Devil's Rejects is basically, like, a road trip western starring, like, knockoff Texas Chainsaw Massacre characters, and it's, uh, Brian Posehn is in it for a little bit. Oh, weird. Uh... It's, uh, it's not bad. It's got a lot of good licensed, uh, Walton Goggins shows up in those, uh... No, Zack Snyder is awful though. Like Rob Zombie, even though he makes a lot of trash, you can tell that he's like capable of like trying to make, you know, justifications and stuff for his, for his choices. Whereas Zack Snyder, you can tell he just went like, well, that looks cool. And just, you know, so I just died and, uh, Oh, let's, let's see what the poll is at. Yeah. Are we at that point of the, I think we're at that point. Guys, we asked you what co-op game you wanted to play tonight. We've reached that time. We've reached that time. Well, for this game coming out in eighty five, it's, you know, pretty technically all right, I guess. I think that's just the copyright on the movie, though. I think the game came out in eighty nine. All right. So we asked, what should we play? Jackbox, Pictionary, Mario Kart, Riff Trax. See where everyone's at. Riff Trax. OK. By a large margin there. I'm into that. All right. I am into that. Yeah, let me go ahead and get my my dual window set up going here. It's time for riff tracks. Are you familiar with the riff tracks website, Chris? Very familiar. Very, very familiar. That's an inside joke. I just got a new email. Oh, there it is. It'd be funny if it was someone complaining because you just made a joke about something they emailed me. Yeah, that was a reference to an angry email that Chris received about the quality of our website. I get angry emails every now and then. It's very rare. Everyone watching tonight in the chat, you're all You're all good, yeah. Cool. Trust me. And email me whenever you'd like, really. But sometimes people send really mean emails to me about things that I have no control over. Like somebody was just being really mean to you about the quality of our website, and they kept going like, have you ever been on the Rift Tracks website before? Yeah. It was weird. I was like, buddy, I don't know what to tell you. So if you ever hear me go, are you familiar with the Rift Tracks website? That's what I'm referencing. Oh, wait, I got to take this off. Oh, yeah, so we can get the code up. In the meantime, you guys will look at Matt. Let me go. Let me go look through the chat here. GB and he says, I think the problem with this Halloween is that Rob Zombie loved the original so much that he couldn't look at it from a distance to see what made it work. That's fair. I actually I don't mind the origin story part of that Rob Zombie Halloween movie. If you can divorce it from being a Halloween movie. What I don't like is the second half of that, which is just the original Halloween again, but sped up because the movie's halfway over. Right. That's where it really kind of falls apart. It's got pacing issues for sure. All right, I'm putting this in the chat. Everyone get ready. Head to rifftracks.games. And his Halloween, too, is actually kind of interesting if you just remove all the Michael Myers stuff from it. Like, if the movie had just focused on Laurie and Dr. Loomis, it would have been great, because the movie's basically about how everybody just deals with the fallout from the first Halloween, and Laurie deals with it by being just incredibly traumatized, and a lot of it's just about her trauma, and then Dr. Loomis deals with it by just his ego goes to his head, like he writes a book about it, and... And it's what's his name? Malcolm McDowell plays him and he's just like a like an egotistical shithead. And then he has like this moment where he goes on a talk show with Chris Hardwick and Weird Al and he has like the Troll Two documentary moment where he realizes that he's only popular because people like laughing at him and he kind of has a meltdown. But what's bad about that one is they had to put Michael Myers in it because it's a Halloween movie and it's like this whole weird thing where he sees his mom and there's like a white horse and it's like, if somebody could just make a fan edit of that movie and remove all the Michael Myers stuff and just make it all about Laurie and Dr. Loomis dealing with the fallout from the first Halloween, it would be decent, I think. Matt, I tuned out thirty seconds ago. Anyway, let's... Thanks, bud. Let's start this game. Sorry, I was just trying to get the thing started, and then I just kept hearing you go like, Loomis, Loomis, Dr. Loomis, Dr. Loomis. Let me turn the volume up. Here, let me get my keyboard where I can access it a little better. Was that too harsh? People in the chat are saying that that was harsh. Look, people send me mean emails and then I have to take it out on Matt. You see the cycle of abuse? The cycle of abuse, yeah. Don't send me mean emails. I end up abusing Matt. This is a great movie. I think I spelled this right. You know what? I've got time. Let me just... Oh. Add it right except for one letter. Okay. We good. We good, Holmes. Speaking of the Halloween movies, Inga and I have been working our way through Twin Peaks again, which we had been doing even before David Lynch passed away, and we just got to the point where Andrew Martell comes back, and I completely forgot that he's played by the bad guy from Halloween III. And all I can think of when I look at him is like, they called it Sam. Newt Gingrich, off. not the carrot nose penis how could she not realize my nose isn't the only thing made from a carrot uh I don't know why I'm questioning jack frost can you hear me chris yeah okay just making sure The problem is that Matt needs it to cover his feet. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. That got my vote. Take a drink every time my feet are brought up tonight. Um, you people are obsessed with my feet. Marla then developed scarphobia, an irrational fear of scars. Time to pick the funniest riff. Uh... I mean, usually I'm easy to, uh, ego manipulate and that I'll click on anything that has my name in it, but should I? Yes. Uh, all right. Hey guys, if you didn't, I begrudgingly gets my vote. If you didn't make it into the game, you can, uh, still vote and help pick clips directly in the Twitch chat. Pretty cool technology. Quite amazing, this computer magic, to quote Spinal Tap. Hey, tomorrow's the mid to late evening show with Mary Jo Peel. Don't miss it. Tomorrow night, APM. Putting together the last final touches on my pre-show for that. Yeah. We have such an amazing show. You guys are going to love it. Yeah, of course. It had to. It had to happen. Now, if you try to force beat references into things that they don't belong, it has to be a nice organic reference. I made this a seven-round game, by the way, because... I don't know if I have two games. Are you the next top riffer? Enter your riff. All right. We still have Christmas mode turned on, I see. Oh, shit. Is that what's going on? Yeah, that's why all these are... That's okay. It's still January. I'll allow it. Is it specimens or specimen? Dude, that's just lazy. Nice. She drove me crazy. Golly Davey, I've never been eaten by lions before. Fine young specimens, Martha. They'll do. Golden Corral will pay us handsomely for this meat. Yeah, golden corral me. I like the bababooey sound effect. I have a broken sense of humor that appeals to me. Yeah, is it specimen or specimens? I feel like the grammar is wonky there. Specimens? Specimen. That's another one of those words, the more you say it, the less it sounds like a real word. Specimen. Specimen. Doctor Specimen. Doctor Specimen. I just got a news alert. Roseanne Barr wants to return to TV with offensive new show featuring a lot of swearing. No one's ever done that before. Maybe it'll be good. I don't, like, I don't know. I've talked about this before. It feels like when people try to make something offensive, it always just comes across, like, I mean, there's some people who are just naturally just offensive people, and that's one thing, but, uh... Yeah, anytime you try to be edgy, it just always comes off like you're a kid smoking in front of a no-smoking sign, you know? You're like, whoa! It's like, what? Is she gonna do her terrible rap song? Nice! Yeah, she was in that terrible music video where her and that other guy looked like characters from Spring Breakers. It's awful. And what do you want? Santa, I brought you a new song. A new song. And what do you want? Santa, I brought you a new song. A new song. It's that time again. Enter your riff now. Oh, I disappeared. Where'd I go? While there's a lull, we don't have any more donations, do we? Sick. Sick. Is that a clip from, like, a cannibal holocaust at the top corner? What is that? It's all Christmas movies and then a snuff film. Admiral Ackbar, maybe? Or is it a bear? I can't tell. It's a trap! Our guns can't repel fire of that magnitude. Maybe I should do Admiral Ackbar for our impressions. It's a trap! You'll need to take your space cruiser through the middle of the new death door. I can do Bolo from The Mighty Boosh. I've got a bad feeling about this. That almost kind of sounded like the new Nosferatu a little bit. Yeah. Oh, his is all about the rolling of the R's. The rolling of the R's and the weird breathing. I need you to bounce on it. What? I love the entire plot of that movie is Willem Dafoe just being like, you need to have sex with this Dracula man to save all of us. Willem Dafoe is great in that. He's great, yeah. Santa, I brought you a new song. A new song? It's Detachable Penis by King Nyssa. And what do you want? Santa, I brought you a new song. A new song. It's Johnny B. Good. And what do you want? Santa, I brought you a new song. A new song. Yes, it's called Closer by Nine Inch Nails. I love how we all just made basically the same joke or different weird songs. A new song. I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm stooping your mom. Stooping. Santa, I brought you a new song. A new song. It's a duet. I'll need to pleasure mouth to sing along. And what do you want? Santa, I brought you a new song. Is that Spanky from the Little Rascals? A new song. It's by a new group called Limp Bizkit. You'll love it. Time to place your vote, fellow rippers. I like the one with Closer in it. That's a good one. I was trying to think of a good song to use for this, and I think that one wins. Yeah, that new Nosferatu is pretty good. Oh, we got a couple more donations here. Oh, nice. Next one. Ryan S., who says, Michael calls Paul Stanley. Okay, we'll have to wait. We got like twelve seconds. I don't know if we can. Yeah, we'll do it the next part. Time's almost up. So I'm going to take a liberal drink to be able to pull off Paul Stanley tonight. My throat is sore. Might be a champion river in the making. Nice. So you can get just two first place votes and win the round. Apparently. Apparently. That is worse than heading off a stampede. How was I? All right. That is worse than heading off a stampede. How was I? All right. Time to bring the funny to your rift now. Let's see how this goes. Uh oh. I didn't know what to do quite for this one, so I'm getting experimental over here. experimental oh paul stanley so uh ring ring hello oh uncle my paulie I strapped here downstairs in your basement and I need to get out who is this I don't know who you are who you're calling for it's michael Are you one of- I mean, I've been with a lot of ladies, but I don't know all my children, but I'm not sure who you are. You'll have to refresh my memory. That is worse than heading off a stampede. Good one. To be continued. Gotta get this. You're fired, by the way. Hello? That is worse than heading off a stampede. How was I? All right. Yes, is this the Cocksucker residence? Okay. Ah, Serial Mom. That's pretty good. Oh, wow. Well, now that two people have made it, it seems kind of hack. Wow, the same joke was made. Two jokes were made by two people. My options are so redundant. We'll do that one. We'll do that one. And then we'll do this one. Get a good variety and spread. All right. All right, Michael, I'm coming to free you from the basement. I'm coming down to you, baby. Oh, be quick, Uncle My Polly. I'm really scared down here. Let me hop on my flying ring and I will be there. Thank you, Uncle My Polly. And scene. All right, we got another one here. Oh, we got like six seconds. Should we wait for the... Yeah, let's wait. I don't want to wait. If you don't get the cocksucker resonance reference, go watch Serial Mom. That's probably my favorite John Waters movie. It's pretty great. Bad and Desperate Living. Pussy willows, daddy. Well, if there was a Santa Claus, And he did bring you a big brother. You know what your big brother would tell you? You've seen the clip. Now enter your riff. Let's see how this does. Let's see how this one performs. Okay, next one. Oh, oh, well, okay. This is like off-brand Charlie Brown. I'm being trafficked by Santa. Well, if there was a Santa Claus, and he did bring you a big brother, you know what your big brother would tell you? In the future, do not, I repeat, do not vote for the guy from The Apprentice. Well, if there was a Santa Claus, and he did bring you a big brother, you know what your big brother would tell you? He did tell you that Nie Elftedele was an inside job while he smoked with next to a blacklight poster in his room like a loser. Well, if there was a Santa Claus, and he did bring you a big brother, you know what your big brother would tell you? We're what you get when you order a Charlie Brown Christmas from Temmel. Well, if there was a Santa Claus and he did bring you a big brother, you know what your big brother would tell you? Probably something like good grief, but that won't get us sued. Well, if there was a Santa Claus and he did bring you a big brother, you know what your big brother would tell you? Big brother will tell you. I'm reporting you to the Trump administration as a day higher. Here we go again. Time to vote. Let's do this one. Let's do this one. And this one. I picked these in no particular order. Sure. I had no favorites in this one. They were all similar in my eyes. Oh, okay. So anyways, the nation comes from Daedra. Daedra, thank you. deidre says having a rough week with an overly aggressive and angry boss would be nice to hear how brother ichabod would chew them out for being shitty okay uh here should I wait to tackle this in the next break or I feel like I'm gonna yeah a second okay but thank you deidre we will get to your request in just a moment that'll give me some time to brainstorm as well Well done. Way to go. Caffeinate a little bit. I just have a series of drinks over here. I'm in second place, debasers. Alright, this is the next to last round. He is stuck. Hey, do you think if we stick around a while, we'll find out what happened? Yeah. Okay. Take a deep breath and enter your rift. Okay, I've submitted mine already. Uh, so, Deidre yelling at Deidre's boss as Brother Echabod. Let me back up from my mic a little bit. Uh... Hey! Fuckhead! Wait, hold on. Oh, I still... Okay. Yeah, I gotta... Alright, do it now. Hey! Hey, fuckhead! You enjoy screaming at people in your office? Well, you must have a little penis! Or perhaps... Uh, a little... little nipples, whatever the female equivalent of the tiny penis is. Uh, I'm not sure if Deidre's boss is a man or a woman, so I'm covering all my bases. Uh, yelling at people who are under you will get you nothing but the worst treatment in hell, just ask Jackie Gleason. He has been made to be a lifeguard in the pool of piss down here in our water park. He just has to spend all of his time swimming in a giant pool of pee, rescuing toddlers who can't swim, and telling people not to bring their inner tubes in. It's a horrible existence. Don't do it. No yelling. Shut up. No eye contact. Oh, God. Santa just shit himself. I can smell it from here. This is the worst episode of Heho I've ever seen. Nice. Oh no, not Mr. Tampon. Let's get him unstuck. Hee-haw babies, they'll make your dreams come true. Two hee-haw riffs, very nice. It turns out he drove a cyber truck into an inch of water. He is stuck. Hey, do you think if we stick around a while, we'll find out what happened? Yeah. Maybe he'll shriek until his heart stops beating. Okay, we all had a good laugh. Now time to vote. dangerous says thank you so much guys I actually do feel better well I'm glad I'm glad to help I always feel bad when I do the ichabod impression on the stream it's not as good as when I do it for the show because I have to like warm up my voice a lot when we record it to be able to to do that well like when I do it just cold it doesn't always come out as good as it does when we do our actual recordings but uh but I'm glad I'm glad you dug it uh you know what I'm gonna vote for the other hee-haw riff because I wrote the first one I'm glad I'm not the only piece of white trash you watched a lot of hee-haw did you watch hee-haw I don't even know what what is hee-haw is that a sitcom or something it's like it's like if saturday night live was made by hicks basically it's uh there was like there was good music on it uh I think whenever I was on it I just heard the name hee-haw like yep not watching that It's not a name that appeals itself a lot. It was one of those things that came on, like, PBS a lot, like, when I was a kid. Yeah, I'm looking at it. There was twenty-five seasons. Yeah, it was on for a long time. Morbo says it sounds like we need a Hee Haw Mystery Hour. Oh my god, yeah, we should do a special Hee Haw episode of Mystery Hour. To show Chris. It was weird because it was all the worst comedy, but then Roy Clark would play guitar and he would be amazing. Wow, DeBaser's killing it this game. Bart Fargo says, I don't recall it being on PBS. I think it was syndicated. Maybe that was it. I thought it was on PBS. It seemed like it came on the same type of channel where I'd see Monty Python's Flying Circus as a kid, which I thought was also PBS. But I could be wrong. This movie. You love me, don't you? Say you love me, Santa. It's go time, mama jama. It's in your ribbon now. I gotta say uh second place tonight was more mario kart blue shells only oh god that would have been chaos Okay, let's see how that does. Santa Claus, you love me, don't you? Say you love me, Santa. And then a loving Santa carried little Timmy over the threshold for their honeymoon night. Santa Claus, you love me, don't you? Say you love me, Santa. Ho, ho, ho. I have been trying to reach you about the expiring car warranty. Nice callback. Santa Claus, you love me, don't you? Say you love me, Santa. Now that you've licked my boots clean, you can get started on the top half of me. Santa Claus, you love me, don't you? Say you love me, Santa. Do you like gladiator movies? Santa Claus, you love me, don't you? Say you love me, Santa. No, I don't. And now I'm gonna feed you to Blitzen. Good stuff. Oh, my God. First, second, third. I'm trying to think of something good to put on when we go off the air here in a little bit. Look around a little bit. We get caught up on all the donations and everything? Yeah, we're good. Okay, good. Thank you so much, everybody who donated. That's awful sweet of you. Yeah. Awful Christian of y'all. Don't forget to join the Super Dumb Bros Super Club. Totally free to join. Watch ad-free on our website. You'll get email reminders whenever we're about to do a show. And you can always watch our most recent live stream on demand. Yeah. Whole week we leave it up till a new one takes its place. Don't do don't don't don't don't don't don't don't. Well, look at this hot shot. Look at this. Oh, I think Matt, I think you just won it. What? No, I think you just took the game. And the winner is. Wow! I didn't see that coming. I don't think I had, like, a top rift the whole game. I was just... I was just slowly just, uh, practicing the fundamentals in the background. That's, uh... Well, thanks so much to everybody who voted for me. I would like to thank the Academy. You like me. You really like me. Uh... Wow. Uh, maze balls. Well, everyone, that was great. That was a fun time. I enjoyed myself quite a bit. Uh, same Z's same Z's. Thanks so much for, for hanging out with us tonight. This has been a blast. Uh, I think I've settled on what I'm going to put on dumb television after we go off since the Mary Jo Peel shows tomorrow. I thought maybe I do a little marathon of some of our, our weird clip episodes. So I've got the weird music videos episode queued up and then the weird trailers episode after that. So, uh, Do it. Do it. So if it takes me a second to update the schedule because I'm holed up in the bathroom like I tend to be after these go off the air, just let everybody else know that that's what's playing. Hold up in the bathroom? Why are you holed up in the bathroom? Because I'm taking a shit. You brought it up. I'm just curious. Is that your post-show ritual? You go into the bathroom for twenty minutes or something? Yeah, you know, it's like Frank, you know, like it's you get done for a while and you hole up in the bathroom. Wait a minute. Are you saying like you spend like an extended period of time in the bathroom, Matt? I mean, like, I have been known to bring my Nintendo Switch in with me, yeah, sometimes. My legs have fallen asleep on the toilet more than once. We have one of those toilets, like, from the late eighties where it's, like, a complete right angle. So it's, like, sometimes I have to, like, regain the ability to walk when I'm done, you know? It's your post-show shitchewel. Ah, love it. Yeah, is this another story? Let's just stream for another hour and just break down Matt's post-show rituals. Chris is now like, this is the most fascinated with my life I've ever seen you. Well, I feel like because you brought up this whole story on Thursday. I've known you for what, like nine something years? For a while, yeah. Like seven, eight years, something like that. I think until now, I never... question how I live my life yeah it's just always kind of like oh that's kind of weird but I you know really don't spend a lot of time thinking about it but now I'm going to pay attention a little bit more and you know because I don't want to like I wouldn't like just like embarrass you like I notice you no you would never do that Well, not without warning, but no, yeah, no. Yeah. It's a, yeah, no, you, you like to bust my balls. It's a, we, we have a fun back and forth. Uh, do I wear shoes in the bathroom? Uh, uh, not really unless, uh, you know, just being holed up in the bathroom is, uh, it's a, it's a nice turn of phrase. You lock the door. You have roommates, so you must lock the door, right? Yes. Yes. Though we do have one of those bathrooms where it's very small, so you can just hear everything that's happening right on the outside of the door. So it's like if anybody's in our kitchen, I'm just self-conscious about just the massive shit I'm taking while they're, you know, cooking food nine feet away from me on the other side. And that's our show, everyone. Good night, everyone. We love you. Stay tuned for Mary Jo Peel show stuff. Bye. Bye.

Matt & Chris turn to their favorite fictional savior Superman to provide some much-needed distraction for the latest Super Dumb Bros., playing Superman for NES, Superman 64, Superman for Atari, and finally, The Death and Return of Superman. Then, Chris goes insane and challenges several viewers to a round of blue-shell-only Mario Kart!

Matt & Chris dive back into the world of Arkham Asylum as Chris attempts to not suck at finding Killer Croc’s lair, and Matt somehow plows through several levels with great ease, all before the Super Dumb Bros. play some scribbl.io with viewers!

It’s the first Super Dumb Bros. of 2025 and the perfect time to revisit a classic 3D Mario game, Super Mario Galaxy, which Matt has a hard time quitting which enrages Chris. Then the Super Dumb Bros. play a round of Jackbox’s Trivia Murder Party where everyone discovers they don’t understand blood types as well as they thought they did.

It’s the final Super Dumb Bros. of 2024 and Matt & Chris are here to play as much of the original Resident Evil game as their impatient brains can handle, which is about 20 minutes, all before playing a few more rounds of Tetris 99 with viewers!

It’s Christmas Eve Eve and the Super Dumb Bros. are here to play through a bunch of crappy games featuring Santa Claus, including Daze Before Christmas, Elf Bowling, and The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause, all before playing a round of RiffTrax: The Game featuring ALL Christmas clips!

Matt & Chris put their differences aside in the spirit of the holiday season, this time to fire up some truly awful adaptations of the famous DIE HARD franchise, including NES’s Die Hard, Playstation’s Die Hard Trilogy, Die Hard: Arcade, Die Hard 2: Die Harder for PC, and other unplayable titles! Then, the Super Dumb Bros. play some Fall Guys and Quiplash with viewers!

Matt & Chris made their families disappear so they can spend time playing various iterations of video games based on HOME ALONE and HOME ALONE 2, which they can definitively say are all objectively awful, all before playing an epic round of RiffTrax: The Game with viewers!

Matt & Chris are here to kick-off the Dumb Holiday Season® on Super Dumb Bros. by playing Christmas-themed Batman games, including Batman: Arkham Origins for Wii U and Batman Returns for SNES, all before playing an epic round of Quiplash with viewers!

Matt & Chris gear up to play some of the earliest entries in the classic RPG franchise Final Fantasy, followed by a couple of hilarious rounds of the JackBox game Guesspionage!

Matt & Chris are back with an all-new Super Dumb Bros. to play the classic 1999 3D platformer Donkey Kong 64, a game that’s as problematic as it is delightful, and then follow it up with a few exciting rounds of Tetris 99 with viewers!

Matt & Chris go live for a special BONUS episode of Super Dumb in which they play through the story mode of Mortal Kombat 11, a story so silly we’re pretty sure the game developers are trolling us. Nonetheless, the Super Dumb Bros. have a lot of fun trying to make sense of it.

Matt & Chris are in the mood for some forced learning, so they fire up the classic school computer game The Oregon Trail with the intention of getting to other educational games. However, Chris gets so caught up in his journey they barely even have time for Mavis Beacon. Then they close it out with some RiffTrax: The Game. Glennis lives!

It’s Election Day Eve and Matt & Chris are here to distract you by playing the N64 platformer Banjo-Kazooie, a game Chris seems somewhat adept at despite barely being able to control! Then the Super Dumb Bros. continue to play The Walking Dead TellTale Game, which mostly involves Chris looking for a band-aid.

Matt & Chris close out Spooky Season by playing the excellent Telltale Game The Walking Dead, a game that legit freaks them out at times and also provides plenty of riffing fodder. Then it’s onto a round of Trivia Murder Party with viewers!

It’s still Dumb Spooky Season and the Super Dumb Bros. are here to play through the iconic horror beat-em-up franchise SPLATTERHOUSE, including Splatterhouse: Wanpaku Graffiti, Splatterhouse 2, and Splatterhouse 3, followed by some truly epic rounds of Fall Guys with viewers!

Matt & Chris continue their bonus episode of Super Dumb Bros., featuring the Super Dumb Bros. playing ALL co-op games with viewers, which very quickly devolves into chaos! Part 2 of 2.

Matt & Chris present a special bonus episode of Super Dumb Bros. that was unlocked thanks to our supporters during The Dumb Telethon, featuring the Super Dumb Bros. playing ALL co-op games with viewers! Part 1 of 2.

Dumb Spooky Season rages on and once they get all those wacky knobs and levels worked out, Matt & Chris take a deep dive into the world of Luigi's Mansion with Luigi's Mansion 3 for Nintendo Switch! To close things out, the Super Dumb Bros. play a few rounds of Mario Kart 8 with viewers!

Matt & Chris kick off sPoOoOoOkY season and take a trip down PC memory lane with the text-based adventure game Maniac Mansion, which is shockingly fun as long as you follow the walkthrough! Then they close things off with a few rounds of Tetris 99 with viewers. Yes!

BOOMSHAKALAKA! The Super Dumb Bros. revisit one of the most popular video games of all time, NBA Jam, and reflect on childhood memories of playing endless hours the game in the nineties. Chris loses to Dallas three times in a row in some real nail-biter games before he rage quits to play Quiplash 2 w/ Matt and viewers!

Matt & Chris, hot off their success of The Dumb Telethon, decide to play Michael Jackson's Moonwalker for some reason, a decision they almost immediately regret, so they play a little Shaq-Fu to cleanse their palette and wind up in the same state of confusion and frustration. The cure? A few rounds of Fall Guys with their viewers!

Matt & Chris present a live bonus edition of their retro gaming livestream Super Dumb Bros. to play through the first couple words of Super Mario World, then are joined by RiffTrax's Peter Hunter to play some RiffTrax: The Game! They also unlock several forthcoming bonus episodes!