Super Dumb Bros. | Here Lies Glennis | Eco Tote Bag

The year is 1848 and Glennis, Jimothy, Bort, Jedward, and Rustopher are set to leave Independence, Missouri to head west towards Oregon. The trip would not be easy. Loaded with enough food to feed the family for just several hours and enough ammunition to arm a large militia, the group quickly fell ill or otherwise had a really lousy trip.

Jedward caught measles. Jimothy got lost in the woods for at least a week. Bort caught cholera. Then Rustopher caught a fever, broke his leg and died. It wasn’t long before both Bort and Jedward also died. Jimothy soon followed.

It was up to Glennis, the sole living member of the group, to float down the Columbia River with all of the party’s belongings or it all would have been for nothing.

Then Glennis’s raft hit a rock and he drowned. What a piece of shit.

Say goodbye to plastic, and bag your goodies in this organic cotton tote bag. There’s more than enough room for groceries, books, and anything in between.

• 100% certified organic cotton 3/1 twill
• Fabric weight: 8 oz/yd² (272 g/m²)
• Dimensions: 16″ × 14 ½″ × 5″ (40.6 cm × 35.6 cm × 12.7 cm)
• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)
• 1″ (2.5 cm) wide dual straps, 24.5″ (62.2 cm) length
• Open main compartment
• Blank product sourced from India